Steady Now
by Muffy the Dough Slayer
Summary: Sequel to Hear Me Now. Please read that one first. AU. Dean and Cas are dating, Anna's making new skits, Hunter's planning spork domination, Sam's being a whiney teen, Jimmy's an annoying brother, and life in general is going alright. Except it's not. Slash Dean/Cas
1. Chapter 1

Yep, here's the sequel! I guess you don't have to have read Hear Me Now to read this, but I think you should ;) Because I can't promise I will explain everything. Anyway, though, hopefully you guys like this one as much as the first! This takes place a little over a year after the events of Hear Me Now, so Dean and Cas are seniors, and it's like, just after New Year's. They are both eighteen but Dean's birthday is coming up. Yes, the puppy-now-turned-dog is mentioned in here and has been given a name! haha ;) Like I would forget the puppy. It is kind of based off of what my old dog, Kodi (short for Kodiak, or Kodiak Bear) who was a mixed breed and was completely black in color and had blue eyes. He looked like a little bear cub when he was a puppy and so I called him Kodiak, but Kodi for short. Sadly, after I had him for a few months, someone poisoned him, and so he is no more ;( I have really bad luck with dogs, and he's not the first one.

Anyway! On a lighter note...

I have no idea where I am going with this story. Don't expect much of a summary, lol, because I'm kind of running blind. I just know I was in the mood to start writing it today and so...yeah...here we are ;) I hope you enjoy this one as well! Hope it lives up to the first one, haha. John actually is present in here! Gasp! In the first one, he was present but only in mentionings, not really in person, except at the trial but he never said anything. Anyway, hopefully I will make him into more of a character here.

Don't worry, the Drama Club is still present! I would never get rid of it! haha. It's still there, and yes, Dean and Cas are still in it. The characters are all still there.

Some people mentioned bringing in Gabriel? I might. If I do, he will be Cas's cousin or something that comes to visit, and maybe Michael will too. But anyway, thanks for reading, and I hope you like it! Please review!

Onward! ...or rather, let's start! ;)

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**Steady Now**

_Sequel to Hear Me Now_

**Summary: **AU. Takes place a year after the events of Hear Me Now. You should probably read that first but you don't have to and I'm not going to make you, but yeah. To get some references in here that I might not explain, you might want to read it over or something. Anyway. Castiel and Dean have been dating for a year now, and now that Justin's gone and behind bars like he should be, things seem to be going easy. Dean is working two jobs and Castiel is working at the local library until they have enough money to buy a place of their own where they can live together. Meanwhile, Anna is making plans for new skits, Sam is being a whiney little (tall) teenager, John is generally nice, Jimmy is a normal annoying brother, and the dog is just happy to be a part of a family. (Horrible summary but yeah, I don't really know where I'm going with it yet. If I think of something, I will add a new summary to the chapter I'm working on, promise! Please give it a shot at least!)

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Chapter One

Dean didn't like his second job. That much was pretty obvious by the way he was scowling, but it wasn't like anyone would see him up in this stupid, dusty attic. He felt his nose twitch, his only warning before he was under a sneeze attack, a series of 'ACHOOS' resonating off the old walls. Fixing up a roof he could do, easily. At least then he would be outside. He forgot what the stupid sun looked like thanks to this attic, but he had promised Mrs. Jenkins that he would clean it out for her and help her turn it into a bedroom for her niece, who was to be moving in with her in a month or so. Dean didn't ask for details, just did the work, and she paid good money and she was a really nice lady, but he just _hated_ cleaning attics.

But of course his father knew Mrs. Jenkins and had been talking to her and had heard that she needed help, and he'd felt it his manly duty to volunteer his son to help. Did Dean have a sign on him somewhere that said 'PICK ME, I LOVE CLEANING!' on it or something? No, he did not believe that he did, and yet John kept loaning him out to little old ladies around the neighborhood. Not that he had anything against little old ladies…just that he did not like cleaning, and especially attics of all things.

"But you're so good at keeping this house clean," John had said, hiding a grin when Dean had protested, "that I can't just keep you to myself. Besides, they're old ladies, Dean, they need all the help they can get."

That didn't mean he had to like it, though.

"Everything going okay up there, Dean?" Mrs. Jenkins called up. Her husband was on some sort of business trip, but Dean thought he had just gone away so he wouldn't have to clean the stupid attic. Sneezing again, Dean maneuvered toward the stairs and sighed, feeling his nose twitch again.

"Yeah, it's going fine, Mrs. Jenkins," he called back, kicking a small ball into the corner of the room. He had no idea how to make this place into a nice room, but he figured he was going to have to at least try. John wouldn't let him stop.

And besides, he needed the money if he was going to get his own place by his birthday, which was nearly three weeks away. John could do to have one less kid to feed, anyway. The money they were getting for John's eyesight disability only went so far, after all, and Dean figured it would be better for Sammy if he moved out. Then Sam could have his room, which was bigger, and he'd be happy about that. He was always complaining about his room.

He complained a lot these days, but Dean figured that was just because he was fourteen. People thought being thirteen was bad, but really fourteen was worse because then the teens in question thought they knew everything because they had been a teenager for a year. Honestly Sammy got on his nerves a lot these days, but he would let the kid have his freedom for now, unless something happened or Sam went too far. Until then, the kid had done nothing wrong except annoy his big brother, but then wasn't that what pesky kid brothers were supposed to do?

There were other reasons Dean wanted to move out, as well. A smile flittered across his face as he thought about it, and it was at that moment he lost his footing and toppled over some old box. As he fell, he mentally cursed all the many boxes of the world, damning them all the fiery pits of hell for making him fall. Grimacing, he sat up and rubbed at the back of his head.

"Dean? Everything okay? I heard a thump," Mrs. Jenkins called up to him worriedly. He could hear her moving up the stairs, and he jumped to his feet.

"Everything's fine, Mrs. J, I just tripped," he told her quickly. She had bad knees so having her come up would probably be a bad idea. The stairs probably wouldn't agree with her.

"Call me Janice," she told him, "you're too formal."

Dean smirked. "Alright, Janice." He turned and went back to stacking boxes in the corners of the large attic. This would make a nice room, if it were to ever actually be cleaned out.

This was going to be a long day. Sighing, his nose twitched again and he sneezed violently.

"God damn it," he cursed the dust in the air. "The last thing I need is to be known as Sneezy." He shook his head and sighed. "Great, now I'm talking to myself. This damn attic is making me crazy!"

He jerked in surprise when his phone rang shrilly in the silence of the attic, blaring out his chosen rock tune. Sighing, he pulled his phone from his pocket and flipped it open.

"Yeah?" he asked in his usual greeting.

"Hey," Sam said, "I'm hungry and Dad's sleeping. When are you coming home?"

"Uh, maybe about an hour?"

Sam sighed that annoying 'that is not good enough' sigh and Dean repressed the urge to roll his eyes and mimic the sound just so Sammy could see how very annoying it was.

"Anything else?" Dean drawled. "Because I'm kind of busy getting eaten alive by dust bunnies."

Sam snorted on the other end of the line. "Your boyfriend called."

Dean smiled. "Alright, thanks. Anything else?"

"I'm bored."

"Noted. And?"

"I'm hungry."

"There's bread and I believe there's cheese and ham, make yourself a sandwich."

"I don't want a sandwich."

Dean sighed. "Eat mayonnaise."

"Gross!"

"I think there's old, fifteen-year-old tuna in the-"

"Nasty!"

Dean chuckled. "You're not giving me a lot of options here, Sammy. Wake Dad up."

"I can't, he's grumpy when he's woken up."

"Order a pizza."

"I have no money."

"Get a job."

"I'm only fourteen! You know I can't!"

Dean sighed. "I think Dad should have made _you_ come over and scrub dusty attics."

"Nah, that job totally has your name written all over it."

"Whatever, oh lanky one."

"Hey!"

Dean chuckled. Sam had grown a little over this past year…okay, a lot. He was nearly as tall as Dean and he was very thin and lanky, and Dean took every opportunity to tease him because of it. "What do you want me to do, Sam? I'm busy."

"But I'm hungry and you're the big brother and I'm the little brother and you're supposed to feed me," Sam said in that soft, 'please! I'm giving the puppy dog look!' sort of voice that Dean could never deny.

He sighed. "I'll try to get out of here in the next half hour, okay? I'll pick up food on the way home. Will that suffice, oh lanky ruler?"

"Thanks!" Sam said, suddenly all cheerful.

_Damn teens and their mood swings,_ Dean thought with a sigh. "Uh huh, but if I'm going to get out of here by then, I have to go and do my work. 'kay?"

"Okay! Thanks! Bye, Dean!" Sam hung up without letting Dean reply.

Shaking his head, Dean pocketed his phone.

Well, saved by the little brother. Less time today of being in the stupid attic, but more time tomorrow of being in it to make up for today.

He didn't know whether he should thank Sam or smite him.

* * *

Castiel was woken by the wet tongue that lapped happily at his face. Groaning, he threw a pillow over his head, his head still throbbing. He'd had a headache all day and thus had been lying in bed the whole time, even though it was already six in the evening.

He was soon smashed by a large, overgrown black dog who yipped happily and tried to tear the pillow away from him. "Go away," Castiel griped, holding the pillow tighter to his head. "Who let you in here anyway? Jimmy. I'm gonna kill him." The dog nudged him with his head, his floppy ears cold to the touch. "Nngh. Stop. Sleep." More nudging. "You really don't get the concept of sleep, do you?"

A bark, loud and in his ear.

"Okay! Okay! I'm up! Sheesh." Castiel threw the pillow away from his head and shoved the dog off of him, sitting up slowly as he rubbed tiredly at his eyes. He glared at the black dog who was watching him with happy, wide blue eyes. The dog, in return, moved forward and licked his face, causing him to grimace. "Soldier!"

Soldier was the dog's name. He wasn't necessarily sure why he had named him that, but as a puppy, the dog had been somewhat serious and reserved at times, eyes alert as though on guard, and Castiel had called him Soldier only one time and yet the name had stuck. Now the dog was an overgrown lump of black fur, some kind of mix between a black lab and some other kind of big dog, Castiel wasn't sure what kind. He had a somewhat curly tail, kind of like a husky, so maybe that was it, but Castiel didn't know. The dog still had floppy ears.

"You wanna go get me some aspirin?" he asked the dog hopefully.

Soldier sniffed at his face and sneezed, pulling away.

"Yeah, didn't think so," he murmured, shaking his head as he crawled out of bed and stretched. Normally Soldier slept in his room but he had let Soldier out earlier so Jimmy could take him outside. Jimmy must have let him back in.

Shaking his head, he climbed down the stairs, Soldier quickly following after him. Soldier liked him the best out of his family, which made Castiel happy. After having been second to Jimmy for most of his life, even though the two were twin brothers, it was nice to have someone pick him.

Of course, Soldier wasn't the only one.

Dean had picked him too, much to Castiel's surprise, but he couldn't have been happier. Thinking about his boyfriend made him smile, and as he entered the kitchen, Jimmy looked up from the kitchen table.

"What're you so smiley about?" he asked, narrowing his blue eyes, identical to Castiel's, suspiciously.

"Nothing. Did you let Soldier into my room?" Castiel asked, grabbing for the aspirin bottle on the counter next to the refrigerator. He filled up a glass with water and swallowed the pills.

"He was scratching at your door, didn't you hear him? I had to do something before he scratched off the wood."

"The door is made of wood…I highly doubt he could have scratched it off," Castiel felt the need to point out.

"Whatever! You know what I mean," Jimmy said, sighing. "Where's Dean today? He hasn't called."

Castiel didn't bother telling Jimmy that Dean usually didn't call until the evenings, and that was it Castiel didn't call him first. Instead, he shrugged. "I heard he's working on an attic today." At least that was what Sam had told him when he'd called the house a few hours ago.

Jimmy nodded and then frowned at Soldier, who was sitting on the ground and staring up at Castiel. "I think he wants you."

"I know. You should take him for a walk."

"Nuh uh, he's your dog, man."

That was true. Dean had gotten him for Castiel for Christmas last year. It had been a wonderful Christmas present.

"Please? My head hurts."

"Still?"

"What, you think I _like_ taking aspirin?"

"Okay, sheesh, snippy."

Castiel sighed. He usually got a little snippy, as Jimmy put it, when he had a headache or wasn't feeling good. "Sorry," he murmured, "just…could you?"

Jimmy nodded. "Sure. Go lay down, you're getting grouchy." He stood and grabbed Soldier's blue leash from the counter, fastening it to his equally blue collar. Soldier whined happily as his tail started to wag, beating against Castiel's leg. The dog knew he was going to get to go for a walk and he liked it.

Castiel shook his head at his dog and then left the kitchen to head back upstairs and to his room.

He was just starting to lay back down when the phone rang. He picked it up, knowing that Jimmy was now out with the dog and his parents were working the late shift tonight. "Hello?" he answered.

"Hey."

Castiel smiled. "Hey," he said back. "What's up?"

"Just got done eating. Sammy got me out of there quicker," Dean said with a chuckle. "I don't know whether to thank him or smite him, because yeah he got me out of there earlier, but now I have to go back tomorrow and do even more work."

"Ah, little brother strikes again."

"Yeah, you're telling me. So, feeling better? Sammy said you had a headache."

"Oh, uh…yeah. A little. I guess." He did feel a little better, but his head was still pounding. He absolutely hated headaches, but then, didn't everyone?

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I guess I'll let you lay down-"

"Nah, it's okay," Castiel said, shaking his head even though he knew Dean couldn't see. "I like talking to you."

"Oh, um, well…"

Castiel chuckled. "Sam annoying you again?"

"God, yes," Dean groaned. "He's getting worse! I'm gonna have to lock him in his room or something, but then he'd just make so much noise that the neighbors would call the cops, and then he would be even more insufferable."

"Have you tried talking to him?"

"He's a teenager, Cas."

"So are we."

"Barely."

"Dean."

Dean sighed heavily on the other end of the line. "He's not gonna talk to me and I really don't want to instigate a talk about our _feelings_ or even how he's annoying the hell out of me. It's just a phase, it'll pass. Besides, it's not like it's _all_ the time, just…mostly."

Castiel sighed. "If you say so."

"Are you going to go watch the last showing of Anna's play?"

"I don't know. Maybe."

"I might go. I haven't gone since the first one and that's just because he threatened to never give me back my keys."

Castiel grinned. "Yeah, I remember." Watching Dean fume over they keys to his 'baby' was a rather funny memory, especially with Hunter poking him in the side every few seconds.

"I think I might go to the last showing. There's always a little party afterward, and you know what that means."

"Pie?" Castiel guessed, seeing as how Dean loved pie.

"And cheesecake!" Dean declared, a grin obvious in his voice. "I could die happy."

Castiel shook his head. "Your obsession with pie is bordering on crazy."

"I knew it! I knew that attic made me crazy! I was sneezing and talking to myself and everything."

"Uh, that's nice to know."

"Mmm, I thought so. Damn dust bunnies of hell live there, and those evil boxes! They tripped me."

Castiel smirked. "Like the covers did that one time?"

"Exactly! I knew you would see my side of this! It's obviously a conspiracy."

"Sure it is."

"It is!" Dean declared. There was a slight pause. "So I'm thinking I can make enough money by my birthday to move out."

"Cool," Castiel said, smiling. Once they got enough money, they were going to get some small apartment or something and move in together. Castiel had a job - Dean had made him get his license - working at the local library, which was better than it sounded. It paid fairly decent money, and Dean had a job working as a part-time mechanic and also helping people around town, like he had been doing today.

"Yeah. Ugh, I have to go, Sammy's being a whiney little bitch again, something about fried eggs? We don't even _have_ any eggs." He could almost picture Dean shaking his head. "Anyway, I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"

"Alright," Castiel said slowly. "Love you."

"Love you too, get some rest."

The two hung up and Castiel fell back onto his bed, bringing his pillow back up to smash onto his face, hoping to somehow crush the headache.

He had to work tomorrow and he hoped the headache was gone by then. Sure, the library was quiet, but that still meant a lot of reading and locating books on shelves, and numbers and letters and…

Just thinking about it was making his head hurt.

* * *

Dean yawned as he lay awake in bed, absently fingering the pendant that was hanging around his neck. It was a necklace he'd gotten for Christmas last year as a gift from Castiel. He never took it off, if he could help it, but he to in PE class. He liked gym but he didn't like playing dodge ball every damn day. It got really annoying.

There was a soft knock at his door. "Dean!" Sam called.

Sighing, Dean rolled out of bed and opened his door, frowning down at his little brother. Or rather, frowning _at_ him because Sam was practically his height and he was only fourteen. It was sad, really, but he would never tell that to Sammy and let him gloat about it. Never. "Yeah?" he asked, reaching out to ruffle the shaggy strands of dark brown hair. Sam's hair had definitely grown darker this past year. He was looking more like their father every day.

Sam scowled at him, narrowing his hazel eyes. "Dad wants to talk to you in the kitchen."

"Alright, thanks. Shouldn't you be getting to bed?"

"Shouldn't you?" Sam shot back.

"How do you know I wasn't sleeping?"

"Because you answered the door right away," Sam said, smirking as he bounded down the hallway and toward his room.

Shaking his head, Dean headed toward the kitchen and found his father sitting there with those bandages around his eyes. He didn't need them all the time, but at night he liked to have them on. It made it easier, he said, but Dean wasn't sure. He probably meant it was easier to sleep because the burns weren't itching when his face touched the pillow.

"You wanted to talk to me?" Dean asked, sitting down at the kitchen table. John was drinking a steaming cup of coffee but he lifted his head at the sound of Dean joining him.

"How did the attic go today?" John asked.

"Fine. I was attacked by dust bunnies and I started talking to myself like a crazy person and I had a sneeze attack, but it went fine," Dean said with a chuckle.

John smiled. "I see. You still planning on moving out on your birthday?"

"Yes, sir," Dean told him. "If that's okay. I could…always stick around and help out…if that's what you want…"

Except that he and Cas had plans, but still…if his family needed him…

He was sure Cas would understand.

"Nah, that's okay," John said, "I was just checking. Been looking into places?"

Dean shook his head even though he knew his father couldn't see. "Not yet, sir."

"Well, I guess there's still time."

"Yeah."

Awkward silence.

"Is that all you wanted?" Dean asked.

"Sure. Want some coffee?"

' "Um…okay." Dean stood and fixed himself a cup and then sat back down again, sipping at it quietly.

"Your brother has been rather snippy lately."

Dean nearly choked on his coffee as he laughed. "That's putting it mildly," he said, grinning.

"I don't know whether I should yell at him or just sigh."

"Same here. It's just a phase, it'll pass," Dean told him.

"I know, but still."

Dean shrugged and smirked as he drank his coffee, sitting in the kitchen with his father. This was something he hadn't done in a long time, probably years, ever since his mother's death. Thinking about it made him grimace. The fire that had killed her had also taken away John's sight and permanently scarred his face, putting him on disability, which was how they were able to keep the house and everything after Justin was put away for murder, attempted murder, possession of a gun without being able to own one, and drug possession. Needless to say, he was gone for life, or at least Dean hoped so.

Dean had doubted he would ever be able to hate someone this much, but he was wrong.

Because he hated 'Uncle Justin' with everything he had.

His hands tightened around the coffee mug.

"Take it easy, kiddo," John said as though sensing what he was feeling.

Dean nodded and finished his coffee. "I'm going to bed…night, Dad," he said, standing to leave the room.

"Night, kiddo," John said back.

Sighing, Dean stalked down the hallway and toward his room.

He was right…it had been a long day.

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...well...how does it sound? Good, bad? Like it, hate it? Hmmm? Please let me know! And if you have any suggestions, PLEASE LET ME KNOW! Because otherwise, as I said, I'm running blind with this story ;) Hope you like it! Please review!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	2. Chapter 2

Sorry the chapter is short, I just didn't want to keep you guys waiting much longer, lol. Not too much happens in this chapter but hopefully things will start picking up soon ;) Anywho, wow! Thank you all so much for the wonderful reviews! I really appreciate it, honest! And the suggestions are nice ;) Thanks!

I won't say too much here, just that if there are any typos, it's 'cause I'm tired but I wanted to go ahead and write this anyway. Thanks again!

Onward!

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Chapter Two

Dean felt like crying, he was so relieved that he was finally done with the attic. It was all clean and things were in their rightful places, and he had to admit that it looked pretty nice, if he said so himself, and he did. He stared at the attic momentarily and felt himself start to smile, admiring his handiwork. Whoever Mrs. Jenkins' niece was would enjoy this room, he was sure. Chuckling, he finished shifting a few things around, gladdened that there were no more evil dust bunnies. No, they had gotten sucked into the vacuum, which Dean had run with a vengeance.

"Dean," Mrs. Jenkins, or Janice, called up to him. He sighed and moved toward the stairs, hearing them creak as someone started to climb them.

"Yeah?" he asked.

"You have a visitor."

He chuckled. "You make it sound like I'm some sort of prisoner, you - Cas," Dean said happily, seeing his boyfriend enter the attic from the stairs. Castiel grinned at him, his blue eyes sparkling, and Dean moved toward him in two steps and pulled him into his arms, smirking. "What are you doing here?" he asked, giving his boyfriend a brief kiss before pulling back.

"I was bored."

"Oh?"

"And Jimmy kicked me out of the car."

"Oh really?" Dean chuckled. "Why?"

"I was critiquing his driving skills."

Dean laughed warmly, throwing an arm around Castiel's shoulders. "I've taught you well," he declared with a smile.

Castiel grinned. "If you say so. Wow, this place looks great," he said, looking around the room.

"Thanks - it took _forever_ and I thought at one point that I was going to die of dust bunnies, but I survived."

Castiel chuckled. "Well, it looks amazing. I'm sure her niece will like it."

"She'd better, I put a lot of time into this place." Dean shook his head. "Wanna get out of here?"

"Absolutely."

"Cool - let's go, then. Where do you want to go?" Dean asked as they headed toward the stairs. He kept his arm around Castiel's shoulders, liking it there. He loved holding Cas, his Cas, close to him, no matter what mood he was in or where he was. The people at school knew about them, and even though they had never come out and told it directly to their parents, he was sure they knew about them on some level. Someone surely had let it slip.

"Wherever you want to go," Castiel told him with that warm smile of his, the kind that left Dean's heart racing. It had always managed to have this effect on him, he knew, but he had at first tried to ignore it. It was why he used to keep touching Cas every chance he got so long ago, before they had ever even kissed.

Dean would never admit it, but he had felt himself start to feel things for Cas the first day they had met, when Dean had accidentally crashed into him…literally. The memory always managed to make him smile fondly.

"I say we get cheeseburgers," Dean said as they moved toward the front door. He paused and looked into the living room, keeping his arm around Cas's shoulders, not caring what Mrs. Jenkins saw or thought of them. "Mrs. J, I'm done with the attic. Cas and I are gonna go now, okay?"

"Wait, let me pay you," she said, standing from the couch, her eyes warm and inviting. He had always liked her eyes. They kind of reminded him of his mother's, which always left him a little nostalgic, wanting desperately to see her again. "Here you go, Dean, you have been working so hard." She pulled out a hundred dollar bill and Dean's eyes flew open wide while Castiel stiffened next to him, staring at the money as well.

"Mrs. J, I can't take that," Dean told her honestly. "I didn't do that much, just cleaned it up."

"I insist," she said with a laugh. "A man refusing money. I never thought I'd see the day."

Dean shrugged. "I can't take it. It's too much."

"Nonsense," she said, shoving it into his hand. "Maybe then you can take your boyfriend some place nice."

Dean grinned and held the money while Cas stiffened next to him again, probably from her admission that she knew about the two of them being together. "Thanks," Dean said sincerely before he turned and opened the front door, pulling Cas a little closer toward him. "If you need anything else done, don't be shy. Just ask me."

"Thank you, Dean," she said as he and Castiel exited the house. They moved toward his beloved Impala, which was parked just outside the house, down the front cement path which had flowers lining it. Mrs. Jenkins liked flowers and she was always messing with them if she could, or at least she did with those in the garden. These flowers were fake, Dean knew because it was still the middle of winter. A light sheet of snow covered the ground in all its glistening glory.

"How did she know?" Cas asked as Dean opened the passenger door for him. He always opened the door when he could, even though Castiel had tried to beg him off the idea. Dean just liked doing it for some reason, liked seeing the way it either made Cas blush or smile warmly. Cas's smile could melt glaciers, Dean was sure. It was even better because Castiel didn't smile all the often, and he seemed to always reserve that particular smile for Dean.

It made Dean feel special, and he liked it. A lot.

"I dunno, she's perceptive, I guess. Plus I had my arm around you." Dean shrugged and then went around to his side of the car. He climbed in and revved the ignition, locking his seatbelt across his chest. "So where would you like to go?"

"I believe you said cheeseburgers."

Dean rolled his eyes. "That doesn't mean we have to get them, Cas, c'mon. I say a lot of things I don't necessarily mean."

Castiel smirked faintly. "I got that, yeah."

Dean grinned. "Good." He moved down the street, stopping briefly at a stop sign, and then he rolled across an intersection. "So where to, Cassie?"

Castiel scowled. It was adorable, Dean had to admit. "Don't call me that," Cas sighed.

"Alright…Cassie."

"Dean."

"Fine, fine. Sheesh. Alright, I guess we'll get cheeseburgers with my brand new money."

"We should use that for the savings."

The savings referring to the money they were saving up to get an apartment soon.

"Yeah, about that," Dean said, pausing slightly as he bit down on his lower lip. He could feel Cas's bright blue eyes on him. "When do you want to start looking at places? My dad thinks we should start soon."

Castiel paused. "That sounds like a good idea. We can start tomorrow, if you want."

"Sure, that sounds great…and no more dusty attics."

"Of course, Dean." There was a smirk in his voice, the kind that made Dean smile.

"Glad to know you're on my side."

"I'm always on your side."

Dean grinned and shifted his gaze toward him. "Even in bed," he said with a snicker, just to see the way Cas's cheeks flushed deep red as he looked away with a scowl. "Kidding. I'm kidding."

But it was fun.

Shaking his head, the two rode in a comfortable silence, the music not even turned on. Dean found Castiel's presence to be calming and warm, which he greatly liked and was overly fond of.

They ate at the small café on the corner, which was where they used to go to get milkshakes after Drama Club when they were practicing their lines. Dean wondered what sort of plays Anna was going to make him do this next semester, the final half of his senior year.

Already, he was a senior. Wow, how time flew! He never would have thought he would have made it this far. Sure, he knew he could probably get great grades if he actually tried, but then that would take away from the reason he preferred to remain at a C average in the first place, and so he didn't do it. It was just easier this way, as he kept telling himself. Or, at least, it used to be easier this way, before Justin had admitted to killing his mother in that fire years ago. Justin had even tried to kill him - twice! Once with a truck and again with a gun. Dean was happy to say that both times, he had failed epically, otherwise he wouldn't be here now, with Cas next to him in the Impala.

His two favorite things - alone time with Cas and his beloved car.

The thought made him grin.

The waitress promised to bring their food to them in the next few minutes, and then she hurried off to attend to other people, appearing annoyed, probably because she seemed to be the only waitress here today. Had the others called in sick? But then Dean decided it really wasn't any of his business.

"So, how's Soldier?" Dean asked casually, leaning back in his booth seat across from Castiel.

Cas shrugged. "He's a heavy blanket in the morning, and he likes to lick my face too much, but other than that, he's fine," he said with a smirk.

Dean nodded. When he had found that dog as a puppy in an alley, alone and afraid, he had immediately thought of Cas, be it because of the dog's shy nature or the fact that it had black fur and bright blue eyes, he wasn't sure. The dog wasn't nearly as shy now, though, but it wasn't necessarily very outgoing, either. It really only liked Cas's family…and Dean. But that was probably because he was over there a lot. He liked Cas's house and his family, but lately he had been staying home more often to help his dad and Sammy.

"You ready for school to start back up?" Dean asked as he sipped at his drink.

Christmas Break would be over in about two days, on a Wednesday, and they would have to return to school. Dean wasn't particularly fond of school, but it was something to do through the week, and it let him see his friends that he wouldn't normally see outside of school.

Plus he and Cas shared about five classes. How that had wound up working out for him, Dean had no idea, but he was grateful.

Cas shrugged. "I guess so. But I'm fond of sleeping in."

Dean chuckled. "Aren't we all?"

Castiel smirked. "Yeah, I guess."

The waitress brought them their food and then hurried off again, leaving them to eat. Dean quickly dug into his cheeseburger and then his fries, slurping up the last of his drink afterward while Cas took his time and ate.

"You're going to choke eating like that one day," Castiel told him.

Dean grinned. "Then at least I'll day happy. That's a way to go though, huh? Death by cheeseburger."

Castiel rolled his eyes and finished eating his food.

* * *

Castiel's parents were gone for the day, so he and Dean went to his house for the time being. Jimmy was in the living room watching TV, and he looked up as they arrived and smiled at the two of them. "Hey, Dean," he said in greeting.

"Hey," Dean said in return, smiling back. Immediately, he was attacked by Soldier, who jumped up to greet him. It was strange, because he never jumped up like that for anyone else, not even Castiel. He would just sit there in front of him and whine until Castiel petted him, but he jumped right up to greet Dean, licking him on the face as Dean struggled to regain his balance.

"Whoa, nice to see you too, Soldier," Dean said with a laugh, scratching the dog behind the ear as Soldier went back to his normal height, getting off of Dean.

"He doesn't do that with anyone else," Jimmy said.

"I know," Dean replied, grinning. "I guess I'm just lucky."

Castiel grinned and moved toward the stairs, where the two went up to Castiel's room.

"So how much money do we have so far?" Castiel asked as they both sat down on his bed. Dean paused thoughtfully for a moment before he shrugged.

"Not enough, I know that. We're still about a thousand or so short of anything decent."

Castiel released a breath. "Well, that sucks." It was only three weeks until Dean's birthday - how were they going to get a thousand dollars? Their jobs didn't pay that much. Plus, Dean's mechanic job only paid him about three hundred dollars per two weeks. They still had a while to go and they were running out of time.

"Yeah…don't worry, we'll get it…eventually," Dean said, sighing heavily as he reached over and grabbed Castiel's arm, pulling him toward him. Castiel felt a spark of warmth and obliged, grinning to himself as he rested his head on Dean's shoulder.

"Hope so," he murmured. "Wanna move in with you…"

Dean chuckled. The sound rumbled through his shoulder and into Castiel's head, which felt nice. "Same here, Cas."

Castiel sighed.

Hopefully they would somehow manage to make the rest of the money they needed in three weeks.

* * *

Sorry it's not that long, but hopefully I will have the next chapter up soon ;) Thanks again, and please continue to review! Also, which story would you like updated first? Steady Now, Green Eyes, Reverberating Footsteps, Bobby Plus Three, or Wrong Number? Let me know, please! Thanks again!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	3. Chapter 3

Sorry this chapter is fairly short as well. I just felt bad for taking so long to update, haha, so I decided to just go ahead and post it since I was at a fairly decent stopping point. In the next chapter, they're back in school. And there's a few visitors, hehe. Anywho, thanks for reading, and thank you all _so_ much for your wonderful, awesome reviews! I really, truly appreciate it! It makes me want to write quicker ;) So thanks!

Also, would you guys like a few one-shots centered around the time between Hear Me Now and Steady Now? I had a few ideas, which are listed on my profile as Hold Me Now and Be Here Now (and if you haven't noticed, this has been called the Now 'verse). Anyway, thanks, and please let me know! Also, let me know if there are any other one-shots you want me to include? And what you want to happen in them? I like this 'verse so I will gladly do it!

Anywho, hopefully the next chapter will be up soon ;) Sorry for the wait.

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Three

Castiel rolled over and slipped his arms around the warm body pressed next to him, imagining that it was Dean even though he knew it was only his dog. Dean hadn't been able to stay the night in a while, and Castiel had to admit that he missed having him around. They could still see each other during the day, when they both didn't have to work, but other than that, they were apart. It sucked, really, but at least Castiel didn't have to worry about Justin and his 'friends' being over, like last year. No, he didn't miss those days…except for those times when Dean had snuck over during the night and had stayed with him. He missed those parts.

Now he lay awake in bed, listening to people yelling out in the hallway. It was nearly five in the morning, way too early for anyone to be awake on a Saturday of all days, and all he could think was, _Here we go again_.

His parents had been fighting on and off for about a month now. At first, it had startled him, and he guessed that maybe it still did, but mostly it just made him want to sigh. He was sure they were going to be getting a divorce soon, and he couldn't deal with them always fighting all the time. It was one of the reasons he couldn't wait to move out and get a place with Dean. He didn't want his parents to get a divorce, but he hated the way they had been fighting recently.

Jimmy had stayed the night at his friend's house last night, and so that left Castiel as the only one here to listen to the argument growing outside his bedroom door. Sighing, he buried his head under his pillow, trying to drown out the sound of them fighting, but it seemed impossible.

Before he knew what he was doing, he was picking up the cordless phone in his room and dialing in that familiar number. A rock tune played while it rang, and just as he was about to hang up because it was stupid calling someone this early anyway, a sleepy voice answered, "Hello?"

"Dean," Castiel murmured, feeling guilty for waking him. Why had he called? He wasn't sure, he just knew that he really wanted some kind of distraction from the sound of his parents fighting. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you-"

"Cas?" Dean interrupted with confusion. "What the…why are you calling? It's like five in the morning."

Castiel sighed. "I know, I'm sorry…I'll hang up now, go back to sleep."

"Wait," Dean said, "what's wrong?" The concern in his voice was touching.

"I just…Mom and Dad."

"Fighting again?" Dean asked sympathetically, and Castiel nodded even though he knew he couldn't see it.

"Yeah…it's loud."

"Want me to come get you?"

"What? Dean, it's early - I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. Go back to sleep," Castiel said, feeling guilt gnaw at him for waking his boyfriend so early. He had just felt like he needed a distraction, like he needed to talk to someone, and Dean always seemed to manage to calm his racing nerves. He seemed to be the only one who could do it so easily, so flawlessly and without even trying. His presence alone was calming.

"It's fine, Cas, I'm awake now. Why don't I come get you and we can go out for a drive? Just get away for a while? Then we can go get breakfast if you want."

Castiel paused. That sounded nice, really, and he felt a little excited as he thought about. After all, he and Dean didn't get to do as much together these days, what with work, school, and life in general. It had gotten a little better since they were on break, but that would be over on Wednesday, which was only a few days away, and then they would be back to how they had been before. Alone time with Dean at the moment sounded wonderful. "Really?" he asked slowly. "Are you sure? You can go back to sleep if-"

"I'm sure," Dean cut in with a chuckle. "I'll be there in about twenty minutes, okay? Let me change into some decent clothes."

Castiel was going to tell him that he could make anything look decent, but he held his tongue. "Alright…thanks, Dean."

"No need to thank me. Be there soon," Dean promised.

"Okay…love you."

"You too, Cassie. See you in a few." Then the line went dead before Castiel could protest the use of that horrible nickname. Oh, if only Dean had never heard it from his family! It was his parents' version of a 'cute' nickname for him, but really it was just annoying as hell. It also managed to make him blush whenever Dean said it, which was also kind of annoying. Damn Dean and his use of words!

Sighing, Castiel crawled out of bed and patted Soldier on the head. Soldier licked his hand and went to the bedroom door, but Castiel ignored him for the time being. He couldn't let him out until Dean was here, otherwise his parents would know he was awake and they would want to 'talk' to him about how they 'weren't fighting, were just in the middle of some misunderstanding', which he totally didn't buy. The two of them had been steadily growing apart for years now, always busy with work.

They must have thought it would get better if they moved out of the city, which was why they had moved here, to Lawrence, but obviously they were wrong. Castiel was glad they had moved, though, otherwise he wouldn't have ever met Dean. Now that he had the green-eyed Winchester in his life, he couldn't imagine life without him.

He quickly slid into a light blue hooded-sweatshirt and a pair of faded blue jeans. Absently, he sat on his bed and fingered the large front pocket of the hooded-sweatshirt, which most people just called a 'hoodie'.

The sound of shouting in the hallway grew louder. Honestly, how his parents thought anyone could sleep through this was beyond him. He couldn't wait to get out of the house, and he silently wished Dean would hurry.

Soldier whined at the door and scratched against the wood. Castiel narrowed his eyes and the dog stopped and marched toward him, sitting next to him on the ground, staring up at him with wide blue eyes. Castiel scratched him behind the ear as he listened to the sounds in the hallway die down a little, probably from the noise Soldier had made, but the shouts quickly came back to their original volume.

He knew both of his parents loved him and Jimmy and wanted what was best for them - honest, he did, but sometimes he just wished they would fight somewhere else. Sometimes he wondered if maybe there was something he should have been doing to make the fighting stop, but every time he wracked his brain for some sort of answer, he could never find one. He didn't know how to make the yelling stop, aside from joining in himself.

It was strange…for so long, he had been silently screaming to be heard, and had wound up finding Dean because his parents had forced him into Drama Club because he was so shy. And now, he was probably going to have to actually scream aloud to be heard in this house, which he hated. All along, he'd had his family and he'd known they were there for him, but now he wasn't so sure. Now, they seemed content to keep fighting and arguing and yelling, and Jimmy was getting out of there every chance he could, which left Castiel alone on most days and nights with them arguing in the hallway or downstairs. It didn't matter where they argued - it was the fact that it was so loud and that Castiel couldn't get away short of walking out of the house, and he felt guilty for doing that. Plus it was freezing outside, a light sheet of snow covering the ground, and his jacket wasn't that thick. He'd freeze if he just walked off.

That was why it was so nice that Dean was doing this for him, that he was coming to get him.

Because for the time being, he just needed and wanted to get away.

And what better way to get away than with his boyfriend?

He heard the sound of the Impala pulling up outside and he practically lunged for the door, eager to get away. He pried the door open and peered into the hallway. His parents were down the hall, in their bedroom, arguing, but they were so loud that he could hear it clearly from where he was. Sighing, he shook his head and left his room. Soldier followed him down the stairs but Castiel ordered him to the kitchen as he moved toward the front door. Soldier did so, thankfully, and Castiel threw the door open to reveal a startled Dean standing there, his fist raised as though to knock.

"Well," Dean drawled, "hello."

Castiel threw his arms around him. "Thanks for coming," he murmured quietly, shivering from the cold of the early morning air. Dean was warm in his grasp, though. One of Dean's arms came around him and kept him close, allowing him to snuggle into that warmth, for which he was grateful.

"No problem," Dean said easily. "Where do you want to go?"

"Can we just…go?"

Dean paused. "Want to get out of here that badly, huh?"

"Yes." Castiel was a little ashamed of this fact but he couldn't help it. He was just so sick of the fighting and he needed to get away for a while. He didn't care where they went so long as they got away.

"Alright, let's just go for a drive, okay?"

"That sounds good," Castiel said as they moved toward the Impala, Dean's beloved car. Dean opened the passenger door for him and allowed him to slide in before he shut it behind him. The inside of the car was warm, the heat blasting from the vents, and Castiel relaxed in his seat, his shivers dying down.

Dean got in and put the car in gear before they pulled away from the curb and away from the house that held all the shouting.

"Sorry for this," Castiel murmured guiltily from the passenger seat, allowing his gaze to wander out the window.

"For what?" Dean asked as though confused.

"For making you come get me."

"Cas…you didn't _make_ me do anything," Dean told him with a heavy sigh. "I wanted to. I'm happy to do it, okay? Stop apologizing all the time. It's not your fault your parents are yelling all the time."

Castiel shrugged and said no more, leaning comfortably in his seat, allowing his eyes heavy eyelids to slide closed. He just needed to rest his eyes for a minute, as he told himself.

* * *

Dean hated that Castiel's parents were fighting all the time. He had been there a few times when the shouting had started, and he had to admit that sometimes it got pretty bad. Why they were so angry with each other, he didn't really know. They had always seemed so happy, the perfect married couple, but he supposed nothing was perfect. There was no such thing as the perfect couple - everyone had their problems.

He just hated that Cas had to be around them when they argued, which was why he hadn't minded coming to get him, even though it was so early in the morning and he was tired. Cas came first, after all. He could sleep when he was dead.

Or he could be like Castiel and sleep in his car. Whatever.

He smiled at the peaceful, content expression on Cas's face, allowing himself to reach a hand out and brush aside a stray black strand of hair while they were stopped at a red light. Then the light changed and he pulled his hand back as he coasted through the intersection.

The country seemed like a good idea at the moment. It was peaceful and it would be nice to watch the sun rise from there, he decided. So he started driving out of town, humming quietly to himself.

He liked to hum when he was in the mood. He would have normally had his music on, but Castiel was sleeping and he looked so comfortable that Dean didn't want to chance disturbing him with his music, so he just hummed quietly and tapped his fingers against the steering wheel in rhythm with the beat in his head.

Dean hoped things at Cas's house would settle down soon. He hated that it was having such an effect on Cas, after all. He seemed more agitated lately, and more tired. Dean didn't like that.

Cas had been there for him when things had been wrong at his home, what with Justin and all, and he was going to return the favor and be there for Cas when he needed him.

Sighing, he continued driving until the lights of the town were long gone, and only the darkness of the open country road opened before him.

* * *

Again, sorry it's so short. Also, let me know! Thanks, and please continue to review!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	4. Chapter 4

I'm so sorry for taking so long! I don't know what happened, really. I just lost motivation, I guess, haha. Got stuck for a moment. I know what's going to happen next chapter, mostly, so hopefully it will be up soon. Anyway, sorry this chapter is so short...I just wanted to go ahead and post since it's been so long. Plus it was a good stopping point. Anywho, thanks for reading and reviewing, you guys! You make me so happy and make me want to continue this story! I might write another one-shot for this 'verse but I make no promises. Hehe, thanks again!

Onward!

Oh...and sorry for any typos...I'm very tired at the moment, hehe.

* * *

Chapter Four

Well, this week was starting off nicely. Could anyone hear his sarcasm? The first day back to school since before Christmas Break and Dean was late. Technically, it wasn't his fault. He'd plead blame-little-brother in a court of law, but he doubted that would go over very well. Grumbling to himself, he hurriedly ran through the halls even though he was already late. He held a tardy pass in his hand, which completely sucked out loud, the red notice seemingly sticking out in the air around him. He kept catching sight of it when he glanced around. He just wanted to get this day over with, and the best way to not make his first period teacher mad was to be not-completely late to his class. A few minutes, sure…but twenty? No. So it'd been twelve already…big deal. Dean just had to hurry…

_Don't send me to the office, don't send me back to the office…can't I just get through this day in peace? Damn it, Sammy, if I get in deep trouble, I am so blaming you, you bitch,_ he thought to himself as he thought back on that morning. He and Sammy had been halfway to the middle school when Sam had decided he was hungry and had demanded pop tarts, forcing Dean to stop at the nearest store to buy said pop tarts. Little brother had still complained, stating that there was no chocolate frosting. Dean had told him to shove it and had hurried him to school on time. Unfortunately, he himself was late. Figures.

He opened the door and entered his first period. Thankfully, Cas was in this class, which made the start to each morning better. At least now he had something to look forward to, right? Not to mention they had Drama Club after school today. Even though Dean often argued that he hated it, he actually rather enjoyed it. The people were friendly, the scenes were fun, and it was just an easy-going atmosphere that he loved. Not to mention, it was how he'd first met Cas, and anything that brought the two of them together couldn't be bad, right?

Castiel smiled at him as he handed the teacher the pass and hurried to his seat in the back of the classroom. Mr. Freeman, his English 12 teacher, scowled at him before returning to writing things on the board. "Where were you?" Castiel asked in greeting as Dean took a seat next to him.

Dean sighed. "I'm fine! How are you? Thanks for asking!" He grinned to let Cas know he was kidding and then he shrugged. "I have an idiot for a brother. I blame him."

"What'd he do this time?"

The humorous tone in Castiel's voice made Dean's lips lift upward in a brief smile.

"He wanted freakin' pop tarts and refused to go to school without them. So I stopped to get him some…and he bitched some more. And now I'm late and it's all his stupid fault." He shook his head and sighed. He didn't really blame Sammy…not really. After all, he'd been Sammy's age once, and he'd been moody then too. Sam was just going through a phase, like all teens. Right? It was nothing to worry about and he'd grow out of it one day.

Dean just hoped that day was sooner rather than later.

"Maybe you should talk to him," Castiel suggested…for about the hundredth time. Dean shook his head and opened his mouth to answer but stopped when the teacher sent him a stern look, clearly telling him to be quiet. He shrugged and turned so he was facing the front, like the good little student he clearly wasn't. Innocently, he smiled at the teacher and nodded.

"Continue," he said, "I'm listening."

The teacher rolled his eyes and continued speaking. Honestly, what was so interesting about learning where to place a comma was beyond Dean. Even so, he forced himself to focus today. Maybe, at least then, it would distract him from the rotten morning this had already been.

Except for being with Cas, of course. That part could never be bad.

* * *

Lunch was loud, as always. Castiel had almost forgotten how loud it actually could be, with so many students crowded into one place, each trying to be heard, their voices raised over the roar of the others. Yeah, it was definitely loud. Sighing, he glanced at Dean, who was sitting to his right. To his left sat Anna, who was grinning.

"I have something very special planned!" she gushed, causing Dean to pause and look at her, his fork hovering a few inches from his mouth, laden with food, specifically what looked like mashed potatoes and gravy, but with cafeteria food, Castiel could never be completely sure.

"Should I be scared?" Dean question, quirking a brow.

Anna shrugged and giggled, not answering him. Instead, she turned to the girl next to her, Kelly, and started talking animatedly. Castiel sighed. Kelly and his brother had been dating on and off for a while now, but they were currently off. She was supposedly dating that guy, Logan, from Drama Club. Castiel didn't really care. Personally, he didn't think Jimmy and her were very good for each other. They struck him as just close friends, which Jimmy had agreed with the last time they'd broken up. Things seemed better this way, or so Castiel thought.

Besides, Jimmy was currently interested in that new girl, Amelia, who had just arrived about two weeks before Christmas Break. To Castiel's knowledge, he hadn't even spoken to her yet but he'd been watching her, trying to get Dean to dig up information on her. Dean seemed to know a little about everyone in the school, therefore Jimmy seemed to think that he magically immediately knew all there was to know about Amelia. The thought made Castiel want to roll his eyes, but he successfully managed to suppress that urge.

He couldn't quite wait to go to Drama Club after school today. He actually missed the gang of people there, since he hadn't seen them since before break. Sure, at first, he'd been rather shy around them, sure they would ignore him and allow him to become part of the background like everyone else seemed to do, but now, they were actually his friends. Him, Castiel…he had friends. That thought was still a little foreign to him but he was growing very, very fond of it. He wasn't the background anymore, wasn't the one forgotten or left behind by the others. No, this time, he was a part of what was happening. He was important.

And he loved that feeling…a lot. He liked knowing that there were people who cared.

His eyes landed on Dean, who was currently swallowing down the last of his water. He never got milk, claiming that he couldn't trust the school's milk after a fiasco in eighth grade, but due to the burst of laughter the statement had gotten out of Hunter, he wasn't so sure he wanted to know exactly what had transpired back then. Either way, Dean always got one of those small, miniature bottles of water when he got food.

Dean grinned at Anna, who frowned at him suspiciously. "If you take my tray up, I will love you forever."

Anna smirked and slid her gaze toward Castiel, who scowled.

"Second only to Cas, of course," Dean said with a smile. "And maybe Sam…and we can't forget about Dad…and Hunter, he's clearly better than you…and, dare I say it….Ruby."

Anna narrowed her eyes. "You sure know how to ruin your own kind words, Dean." She smirked and shook her head. "But don't worry, I'll get back at you later for it." She grabbed his tray and stood, moving to get rid of it. Dean smirked after her and turned his attention to Castiel.

"I was thinking milkshakes and cheeseburgers," Dean told him seriously, as though handing him the world's secrets on a silver platter. Castiel stared at him momentarily and then rolled his eyes.

"Again, Dean, there's more to life than cheeseburgers."

"I very seriously doubt it," Dean told him. "So, we good to go after Drama Club?"

Castiel nodded and smiled at him. It wasn't like he could say no, anyway. He didn't want to go home and listen to his parents argue all the more. It kept getting worse and he seriously wished they would stop, but he figured the odds of them doing that were slim to none. Plus, he liked going places with Dean. He enjoyed being with Dean period, after all.

Plus, who was he to turn down a good milkshake?

* * *

"We are going to be having one more major play for this year, as a sort of last hurrah for the seniors," Anna announced first thing in Drama Club. Dean and Castiel were barely through the door when she started speaking, seemingly too excited to hold it in any longer. Hunter was at her side, forever the loyal boyfriend, and he was grinning from ear to ear. Clearly he was pleased too. Ash had graduated and so he wasn't around anymore, putting Anna in complete control of the group, along with Hunter since he was dating her.

There were a few groans but mostly people cheered. The groans were from the newest members, who had joined shortly before Thanksgiving for some strange reason. Dean had a feeling they'd lost a bet or something, but he wasn't sure.

"I will need as many people as I can to be in it," Anna continued, that large smile still plastered on her face. Her cheeks were going to start hurting if she didn't stop soon, Dean was sure. "I want every senior to sign up. We need to make this play count!"

There were a few cheers, mostly from the girls. The guys just stood there and watched.

"What's it going to be about?" Kelly asked, looking surprised. Clearly Anna had kept this a secret from her. Huh. And here Dean had thought that girls couldn't keep their mouth shut about anything, especially when talking to other girls. They certainly talked enough, after all.

Anna grinned. "I will let you know that when I cast the lead roles. So everyone sign up! Here is the sheet, pass that around." She handed out a paper and a pen and it started moving through the crowd. Dean looked at Cas, shrugged, and signed both of their names before passing it on. "Since this is the first day back, I thought we could just relax a little. Do homework if you need to, or just relax and talk."

She hurried off with Hunter, leaving them all standing there, clutching at the piece of paper as it continued to move around.

Dean shrugged again and sighed. "Sometimes, that girl really scares me."

"Same here," Cas told him, grinning.

Dean loved his grin. In fact, he loved it so much, he was going to kiss those lips. And he did.

Several times.

Until someone cleared their voice, forcing them apart for the time being. Joy.

Sometimes, people could be very annoying. Like Sam.

But at least there would be milkshakes later. And cheeseburgers…and Cas.

Three of Dean's favorite things. Cas ranked first, of course. Along with Sam, but who was counting?

* * *

Anywho, thanks for reading! Hopefully the next chapter will be up soon! Please keep reviewing! Thanks!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	5. Chapter 5

Hmm seems this story is destined for short chapters ;) No different than most of the chapters of the first one, eh? lol anyway. Sorry it's taking me so long to write this story! I know what I want to have happen throughout it...it's just getting to those spots that's the problem ;) hehe anywho. Thank you all so much for your wonderful, inspiring reviews! It's what made me want to write this chapter. I'm also working on another one-shot for this 'verse, so be looking for that. I'm not sure what it will be called, mostly because I have conflicting name ideas. Anyway, thanks again for reading, and please continue to review! The reviews keep the story going!

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Five

Dean prided himself on the fact that it was kind of hard to startle him, mostly with anything. Loud noises didn't necessarily bother him unless he was distracted when he heard it, and who could forget the annoying sound of Sammy's teenage voice? If that couldn't startle him, he wasn't sure anything could. So when he came home that day after taking Cas home, he was more than a little shocked when there was a police officer standing in his living room, talking to his father, who was seated grimly on the couch. Due to the wrapping around his eyes, he couldn't necessarily tell what his father was feeling, but he had a bad feeling about all of this. He didn't like cops in general, after all.

Swallowing, he hoped to mostly blend into the background as he eased past the officer and toward the hallway that would lead to his bedroom. Sammy wasn't here, since he'd declared quite loudly yesterday that he would be going to Josh's after school for some school project they had to do. He was to call Dean when he was ready to come home. Dean wondered when he had become the family chauffer, but he didn't really mind. He liked helping his family.

"Dean," his father said. Damn him and his excellent hearing! Dean sighed and turned, facing him and the officer. He walked back into the living room and frowned.

"What's going on?" he asked, trying to keep the worry out of his voice. The last time he had dealt with police officers, they'd decided to practically use him as bait to get Justin to admit to his crimes so they could throw him behind bars. So maybe it was plausible as to why he was more than a little uneasy as he stood there in front of the tall officer. "Something wrong?"

John took a slow breath and gestured at the spot next to him on the couch. Dean slowly walked toward him and sat, looking from him to the officer. "I'm afraid I have some bad news," the officer said, looking apologetically at him as though sorry for the words he would soon have to speak. Dean never had understood why the officers said or looked as though they were sorry. It wasn't like they could really feel the depth of their words, after all. No matter what they said.

"What do you mean? What's going on?" Dean asked, his frown deepening as his heart sped up a little in the worry he was struggling to hide. "Dad?" He looked at his father as though for answers, but John's head was bowed toward the ground. A somber silence surrounded them and Dean really did begin to worry. Had something happened to Sammy? Was that why they were both behaving like this? Had something happened to his little brother while he'd been out with Cas, having milkshakes and cheeseburgers? The raw twisting of guilt gnawed painfully at his stomach and he swallowed thickly. "Is something wrong with Sammy?"

"No," John said with a heavy sigh. That painful knot loosened and Dean felt like he could breathe again.

"Then…what's going on?" he asked, wishing they would just spit it out already. "Dad, why is there a cop here? What are you doing here?" He looked at the officer. "What's going on?"

"Son…" the cop said as they shook their head.

"I'm not your son," Dean said heatedly, narrowing his eyes at the guy.

"Dean," John chided. "Please don't be rude."

Dean would have argued, but John had said please, and his father rarely ever used that word. Only when he really meant it, and that was the only reason Dean snapped his mouth shut and watched the cop with narrowed eyes.

"It's about your uncle…Justin Winchester."

Dean swallowed thickly and closed his eyes. He had always feared that something like this would happen. Had his uncle gotten free or something? Tendrils of fear, cold and slick as ice, curled tightly around his heart like a dreadfully tight hand that refused to even allow him room to breathe. Justin couldn't be free…right? He prayed not.

Because he couldn't go through with that stuff again. He couldn't. And he couldn't put Cas through it again, either. Once was bad enough, and he could have potentially put him in danger, and that simply wasn't an option.

"He was found dead in his jail cell this morning…" the officer continued, and Dean stared at him, his heart racing and silence ringing loudly in his ears. Had he heard the guy right?

"Dead?" Dean asked, frowning.

The cop nodded. "Yes. We don't know what caused his death, but we are looking into it. We just thought we'd tell you before it hit the papers…"

"Papers?" Dean echoed, his frown deepening. Why would his uncle's death be put in the papers? Justin was just another criminal, right? Dean had thought all of this was behind him, so why was this cop bringing everything back up again?

"We suspect foul play," the officer said slowly, as though Dean were some fragile little boy that couldn't hear any of this news of his uncle's death. Dean would have scoffed if it weren't for the fact that the cop was potentially talking about murder. "It's being put in the newspapers…there's no way we can stop it. Word got out. We just thought you should be the first to know…before you read about it in the papers tomorrow."

"Thank you," John murmured with a heavy, sad sigh. Sure, Justin had murdered Mary, blinded John, and tried to kill Dean twice, but he was still a member of the family. He was still John's brother, his only brother, and Dean could relate to that. Even if Sam had been convicted of doing all those horrible things, he would still love him, would still root for him and pray and hope for him…so he knew a little of what John was feeling.

But in his own mind…he felt mostly numb. He didn't really care, and that thought hurt him. He always cared about family, right? Justin was still family. However, after all the guy had done, after he'd taken his mom from him and Sammy and had tried to kill him on separate occasions…Dean just couldn't find it within him to really give a damn about the man's death. Sure, he didn't necessarily like that it was murder…that someone else had taken his uncle's life…but he couldn't really feel overly sad about it. He had stopped caring when his uncle had been put in jail.

Maybe that made him a horrible person, he didn't know. He felt guilty that he couldn't find it within him to care, but…he just didn't care. For all intents and purposes, Justin was dead to him.

And now, he literally was. Dead. Gone. Murdered in jail…

Dean released a slow breath and tuned the conversation back in as the officer began explaining how his uncle had been found early this morning in his jail cell. All the while, his mind kept wandering back to Cas…his Cas. Castiel could make things better, could make everything seem like it was going to be okay. Everything was warm and inviting with Cas.

And that was exactly where Dean wanted to be.

* * *

Castiel was getting ready to go downstairs and fix something to eat, since both of his parents were working and Jimmy was taking a nap upstairs, when he heard someone knocking lightly, almost hesitantly, on the front door. Soldier darted toward the door, happily wagging his tail, and Castiel followed after him more slowly. He pulled the door open and frowned. "Dean? What's wrong?"

Dean didn't look that great. His eyes were downcast, his expression mostly slack and blank, which Castiel didn't like at all. A muscle in his jaw kept jumping, meaning he was upset about something, Castiel knew. Frowning, he grabbed Dean's arm and pulled him inside, dragging him toward the couch while Soldier padded around them happily.

"Sit," he said.

Dean sat on the couch and Soldier sat at his feet, licking at his hand. Dean scratched him behind the ear and sighed heavily. "Sorry, Cas," he mumbled quietly.

"What's wrong?" Castiel asked, frowning in concern. He didn't like it when Dean was so quiet. It wasn't like him at all. "Is everything okay?"

"Everything's all messed up."

"How so?" He sat next to Dean on the couch, wishing he knew what was wrong. Soldier seemed to sense that something was amiss, because he rested his head on Dean's lap, watching him with wide, understanding eyes. "What's going on? What's wrong?"

Dean sighed heavily. "Justin."

Castiel frowned, stiffening. Dean didn't mention his uncle much, but Castiel didn't blame him. He actually preferred it this way, really. He didn't like Justin at all, after the times when the guy had tried to kill Dean. After all he'd done, Castiel was certainly glad he was behind bars. He knew Dean sometimes felt a little conflicted about it, because Justin was still his uncle, but he was where he was supposed to be.

"What about him?" Castiel asked slowly, frowning.

"He's dead."

Castiel blinked in shock. He hadn't been expecting those words, not at all. For a moment, nothing was spoken between the two of them as Castiel tried to wrap his head around the words. Justin was dead? That didn't settle well with him, not really, because how? He'd been in jail, sure, but he'd been healthy…

"Oh," he said stupidly, but that seemed to be all that he could come up with at the moment. "What, um…what happened?"

Dean shrugged. "They don't know. They just found him dead this morning. An officer was out my house when…I went home." He shook his head. "Everything's all messed up."

"How so?" Castiel asked again, resting a hand on Dean's shoulder. Dean finally glanced at him and then averted his gaze once more.

"I mean…I just…I don't know, Cas." He shook his head. "I just…had to get out of there for a while, you know?"

"Yeah," he said, because he did. He knew what it was like to feel the need to leave the house, to have that urge when things became too much.

"I just…I'm confused."

"How so?"

Dean paused, hesitating, before he shrugged. "Do you think I'm a bad person?" he asked quietly, looking at the ground as though it were the most interesting thing in the world.

Castiel blinked at him in confused. "What? No! Why?"

"Because…I don't…care."

"Huh?"

"That he's dead. I don't…" Dean shrugged. "…care."

"You don't care?"

Dean shook his head slowly. "I just…I don't."

Castiel paused. "That's just because of what he's done to you and your family," he told him reassuringly. "That doesn't mean you're a bad person, Dean. People can only be pushed so far, after all."

"I mean…I don't like that he's dead…or murdered, or…"

"Murdered?" Castiel chimed in, frowning greatly.

"Yeah…the police suspect 'foul play' but they're not very forthcoming with answers."

Castiel frowned. "Why would someone kill him?"

"I don't know…drugs? Money? I honestly have no idea, Cas," Dean told him with a heavy sigh.

Castiel nodded. "Okay. But…you're not a bad person for not caring. People can only be pushed so far, and he did try to…well…um…kill you, right? Not just once, but…" He trailed off, not wanting to finish that sentence himself. Flashes of that night shot through his mind and he suppressed the urge to shudder at the thought of himself waiting in that stupid police car while Dean went in with a wire. That was such an idiotic idea…it could have gotten Dean killed. Almost had. "You're not a bad person," Castiel said, snapping himself out of his thoughts as he looked at Dean.

Dean smiled at him faintly. It wasn't much but it was better than that blank, slack look he'd had when he'd come in. "Thanks, Cas."

Castiel smiled back. "No problem. Hungry?"

"Aren't I always?"

"Since I've known you, yeah," Castiel said with a smirk as he stood and led Dean into the kitchen. Soldier followed after them happily.

It did worry him that Justin had been murdered…but he figured he could worry about that later. Right now, cheering up Dean was his main priority, and he knew just how to do it.

He put a newly bought apple pie on the table and watched happily as Dean's eyes lit up.

He was going to be there for Dean like Dean was always there for him, as he vowed to himself.

* * *

Sorry if there are any typos...anywho, I'm on Christmas Break now, so hopefully I will be able to write more! Thanks again for reading and please continue to review!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	6. Chapter 6

Sorry it's so short ;( I didn't wanna get into what happens next just yet, hehe, and I figured Dean and Cas could use a break...and some fluff ;) And Twister, of course. Anyway, thank you all so much for reading and reviewing this story! You make me want to continue ;) Hope this makes you happy! Three stories updated in one day! hehehe...but yeah. Lol anyway.

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Six

Practically everyone knew Justin Winchester had died in prison. They also knew that there was suspected foul play but the police thus far had nothing concrete. That was what all the papers were saying, after all, and all it did was complicate things, at least in Castiel's eyes. He knew Dean thought that everyone was just being nice to him and looking at him out of pity, and he knew his boyfriend hated pity, absolutely loathed it. He tried to be there for him as much as he could in the next few days, but it wasn't easy. Dean seemed more quiet than usual, and everyone was taking notice of it. Castiel wished he could help, but he didn't exactly know what to do to really cheer him up. Pie had helped to some degree, and things had seemed to be going fine for a little while, until they went to school and people came up to ask Dean about what they had read in the recent papers. That had only made things worse.

To cheer Dean up, Castiel had invited him to dinner at his house, since he generally didn't go to Dean's. He wasn't sure why, but he had only been to Dean's house a rare few times, and never for that long. He'd never stayed the night there or anything. He thought that maybe it was just because of the memories of Justin Dean had when he was there or something, Castiel didn't know. He didn't worry about it much, though.

Dean was to be arriving any minute and Castiel hoped things went well. He hoped his parents didn't start fighting again, like they had been doing lately. They both seemed to be in a good mood today, though, so he was hopeful. Jimmy was also to be on his best behavior, as Castiel had told him - more like snapped at him when he got up this morning, but whatever.

When he heard the sound of the Impala pulling up, he moved toward the door and happily threw it open to reveal Dean standing there, smirking at him. Well, he appeared to be in a somewhat better mood, which was nice. Maybe, since it was the weekend now, he would have time to adjust without people at school questioning him about it. Honestly Castiel just wanted to smack them or something, because couldn't they see that obviously Dean didn't want to talk about it? How dense were they? No one in Drama Club had brought it up, thankfully, though.

"Hey," Castiel greeted warmly as he grabbed Dean by the arm and pulled him inside, instantly pressing his lips to Dean's. His parents were in the kitchen already, getting ready and hopefully not arguing or anything, and Jimmy was still upstairs, talking to his friends or something online with his gaming system.

"Hey," Dean said back, applying more pressure to the light touch of their lips in a gentle, loving kiss that brought with it more care than Castiel had felt before. He pulled back happily and kept a hold of Dean's arm as he led him toward the stairs.

"Dinner's not quite done yet," he said with a shrug. "You're a little early."

Dean grinned at him. "I figured it was better to be early than late," he said with a nod of his head, as though he were happy with himself, which Castiel was glad to see. It was definitely a nice change from his attitude these past few days, ever since the news release of Justin's death in the papers.

"I guess so," Castiel agreed as he pushed open the door to his room and he and Dean entered. Dean grinned at the sight of the Twister game which was rolled up in the corner. Castiel grinned because he'd thought that would cheer him up. Dean seemed to love the game, if the way he played it last time was any indication. "I thought we could play later, if you want."

Dean happily slid an arm around his boyfriend's shoulders and nodded. "Nice thinking, Cas. Knew I kept you around for a good reason."

Castiel rolled his eyes. "You've said that before, you know-" he started, but was cut off by the warm feel of Dean's soft, pliable lips pressing against his. Grinning, he kissed back in kind and then sighed when they pulled apart. "There are much nicer ways of getting me to shut up."

Dean shrugged. "Would you _rather_ me smack you upside the head, or would you rather have a kiss? Because if that's what you want, I can stop kissing and go for the head." He grinned at him and Castiel rolled his eyes again, shoving lightly at Dean in good humor.

"Jerk."

Dean stuck his tongue out at him. "Just wait, Cassie, I'll whoop your ass at Twister. And Jimmy's too, if he decides to rear his head in this game of champions."

Castiel held back a snort as there was a knock at his door. Sighing, he moved away from Dean and pried the door open to see Jimmy standing there in the hallway, smirking at him. "Dinner's done, lovebirds," he said in a sing-song voice before he hurriedly darted away before Castiel could retaliate.

Damn annoying brothers…now Castiel knew what Dean was talking about when he complained about Sam. Shaking his head, he looked at Dean. "Your food awaits," he said with a grin.

Dean nodded. "Hurrah for the King." He followed Castiel out of the door and down the stairs. They entered the kitchen to find that everyone was already seated.

Castiel's mother, Bethany, smiled kindly at Dean. It still made Castiel think of cookies, her smile and voice. Sweet, warm cookies that could never do any wrong…

"Nice of you to join us, Dean," she said warmly as he and Dean sat at the table, across from her and Jimmy. Castiel's father, Mark, sat on Castiel's other side, at the head of the table, the man of the house.

"Thanks for having me," Dean said politely. It sometimes surprised people, but Dean could be polite and kind when he wanted to be. He wasn't always just rude like people thought. People just got the wrong idea, which Castiel knew about all too much. People used to think him weird and wrote him off before they ever even got to know him, before he'd come to this school and had met Dean. He felt warm inside just thinking about it. It must have been obvious because Dean kicked him under the table. Damn perceptive boyfriends…

"So how have you been, Dean?" Mark asked kindly as he cut into the meat on his plate.

"Pretty good, sir," Dean said.

"I told you, you don't have to call me sir," Mark told Dean like he always did.

And Dean replied how he always did. "Okay."

Why Dean kept calling him 'sir', Castiel didn't know. He didn't really think about it too much, though. Maybe it was just how Dean treated older male figures. Maybe that was what he'd learned from his father or something. Some ingrained instinct.

Jimmy giggled which completely caught everyone off guard. He cleared his throat and went back to his food. Castiel and Dean shared looks and then shrugged simultaneously before going back to their own food. The food was good and dinner went by nicely, without any arguing or raised voices. It was turning out to be a good day.

When dinner was over, Dean, as always, offered to help with the dishes and Bethany, as always, declined and told them to go along with their business and be boys. Castiel led him back up to his room and Soldier obediently followed after them. They caught up to Jimmy in the hallway.

"We're playing Twister," Dean declared as though he was the master of said game, "do you dare take on the challenge?" He quirked a brow at Jimmy as though this were the call to destiny.

Jimmy grinned. "You're so going down."

"Very unlikely," Dean said as they all entered Castiel's room and put out the Twister game.

Castiel resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

"Who's on the board and who's spinning?" Jimmy asked.

"Dude, I'm _so_ spinning," Dean declared as he jumped, literally, onto Castiel's bed and sat Indian style, pulling the spinner toward him.

"Fine…but nothing crazy like last time! We're playing fair this time," Jimmy said with a grumble as he kicked off his shoes and socks so he wouldn't slide easily. Castiel did the same and the two of them stood on opposite ends of the game.

"Aw, but that's not fun! That's boring," Dean said.

"I don't care, play fair."

Dean rolled his eyes. "Whatever. Boring guy." He shook his head and spun the pointer. "Hmm…left foot red."

They moved accordingly, which was easy enough.

"Right hand yellow."

They bent down to do as he said.

"Can I be fun now?" Dean asked innocently. "Pweeeeeze?"

How the hell was Castiel supposed to be able to resist _that_? Simple, he couldn't. So he sighed and nodded. "Fine…"

"Don't give into him! Resist!" Jimmy snapped. "He'll make us do something crazy…again!"

"Oh, you big baby, you'll be fine," Dean said with a scoff. "Hmm, okay, let's see here…right index fingertip green."

Sighing, they moved accordingly, stretching when they had to.

"Right earlobe grellow."

Green and yellow. Great. Why had he given in again? Oh yeah, because he couldn't resist. Damn. He was going to have to work on that or something.

"Left eyelash blue."

How was that even possible?

Yeah…it was going to be a long game.

But at least Dean seemed better now.

* * *

Dean wound up staying the night, which wasn't surprising. Castiel liked this, he had to admit. It was his favorite way to wake up, wrapped in warmth with the person he loved next to him in bed, the sound of their combined soft breaths filling the room. It was nice…no, it was great. Smiling to himself, he blinked his eyes open to see sunlight filtering into the room through the blinds.

He moved closer to that wonderful source of warmth and closed his eyes, hoping to fall back to sleep even though he was sure he was already awake. He was far too comfortable to get up, though, and there was no way he was going to disturb the moment. Dean didn't get to stay over that often, not lately what with their jobs and everything, and he was going to enjoy it while he could.

The Twister game last night had been amusing, to say the least. Dean, as always, had won. Honestly, Castiel wondered how anyone was that flexible, but he wasn't complaining. Jimmy had lost yet again and had gone to bed with his ego bruised, which was also rather amusing. There was no harm in it, though. No one meant anything by it, it was just a game, and they all knew that. But it was fun to play it…just not all the time. Castiel wasn't so sure he could take the craziness all the time. Every once in a while, though, it was fine. And it was a good way to cheer someone up. He liked to think that he'd helped Dean, anyway.

Dean shifted against him and Castiel opened his eyes in time to see Dean blink his open as well. "Mmm…could get used to waking like this," Dean murmured with a heavy yawn.

Castiel nodded with a smile. "That can be arranged…when we get an apartment or something."

Dean sighed happily. "Can't wait…" His eyes slid closed again but opened a moment later, signaling his tiredness but his willingness to stay awake. "It'll be…awesome…" He yawned again.

"Yeah…"

Castiel couldn't wait. He hoped they made enough money so they could actually move in together. The thought was so nice…He would be away from his parents and their fighting, away from nosey Jimmy - he loved his brother, but that didn't mean Jimmy wasn't nosey - and best of all, he would be with Dean. Sure sounded like paradise to him.

He smiled at the thought and sighed happily.

"What are we gonna do today?" Dean asked quietly, his voice shrouded in sleepiness.

"Dunno…thought we could just lay here for a while," Castiel said truthfully. He didn't want to get up yet. He was comfortable.

Dean smiled. "Ah. A lazy day, eh?"

"Yes."

Dean nodded. "I can go for that. Alright, let's lay around like lazy teenage boys…but wait, that's what we are. Let's be ourselves then, yeah?"

Castiel smirked. "Sounds good to me."

In truth, it all sounded good to him, so long as Dean was there.

* * *

Thanks for reading! Please continue to review!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	7. Chapter 7

I am _so_ sorry it's taken me so long to update! I knew what I wanted to happen next, it was just a matter of sitting down and writing it, haha. But here it is! Finally! I really am sorry for the wait...hopefully it won't take so long next time, haha. Yes, Gabriel is introduced in this chapter and Michael is mentioned. Except, I made Gabriel a year younger than Castiel, mostly so it would fit better into the story, lol. Anyway, thank you all so much for your wonderful, inspiring reviews! Please continue to leave them, they keep me going!

Haha this song is awesome...it's What are You Looking for by Sick Puppies. ;) it's in my head lol.

Yeah...I'm really tired right now...so if there are mistakes, I apologize! Influence of sleeping pills and all that...school tomorrow...ugh. Hate school...haha and the mentioning of the sewage problem...the middle school in my town recently got out due to a sewage problem but the high school was still in 'cause they are separate sewage things or whatever, lol. I was so mad! I was like "why can't we get out too?" sigh.

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Seven

The next weekend, Dean woke to a grumpy Sammy stomping through the halls. For a brief moment, he tried to ignore it and get back to sleep, but Sam just kept doing it, right in front of his door, and he had to know that Dean could hear him, that he was awake. Groaning to himself, Dean rolled out of bed and moved toward his door, combing his fingers through his unruly dark blonde hair. He pried his door open slowly and peered at Sam, who was still pacing. "Okay, I'll bite," he sighed, causing Sam to stop and look at him. "What?"

"Where would you like me to start?" Sam shook his head like the annoying teenager he was and Dean scrubbed a hand over his face. "Dad went to talk to the police."

"What?" This was news to Dean. His eyebrows rose in question. "What do you mean? Why?"

"I don't know." Sam shrugged. "He didn't tell me, just said it was something about Uncle J-" Sam broke himself off and glared at the ground. Dean knew that Justin's betrayal had stung savagely at Sammy, as the kid had really looked up to him. Hell, Dean had too. It had been hard enough on Sammy when Justin had been put in jail for trying to kill Dean - twice - and killing their mother in that fire, but now that he was dead, too? Murdered, no less? It was really taking its toll on his little brother.

Dean rested his hands warmly on Sam's shoulders and tugged his little - and growing - brother close to him, hugging him. It wasn't often he did this, rarely felt the urge to really do so, but he could bend every once in a while. Sam buried his face in his shoulder and for the first time in what felt like years, he took notice of the dampness of Sammy's face as it began to coat his shirt as well. Sam was crying, his shoulders beginning to tremble, and Dean kept his arms wrapped tightly around his little brother as though daring for harm to rear its ugly head, because he wasn't going to let anything more happen or disturb his brother.

"It's okay, Sammy," Dean whispered softly, running his fingers through the back of Sam's hair. "Everything's okay."

"How?" Sam whispered back shakily, taking a precarious breath. "Everything's so messed up…Why is this happening?"

"I don't know," Dean answered honestly, because he really didn't. He didn't know why any of this had had to happen, or why this was still happening, why Justin had been murdered. As if the guy hadn't taken enough away from this family…

Dean shoved his anger down. It wasn't right to hate a dead guy, but Dean felt the urge just the same, which made him really feel like an increasingly horrible person. Dean closed his eyes, resting his chin on the top of his brother's head as Sammy leaned into him like the clingy five-year-old he'd once been.

"It's okay, Sammy," Dean uttered again, the mantra from after Mary had died. "Everything will be okay. Promise."

And if there was one thing he was good at, it was keeping his promises. He kept his arms wrapped around his brother like a safety blanket as he maneuvered the two of them into his room and sat them comfortably on his bed. He wondered, briefly, how their father had gotten to the police station, but probably either an officer had come to get him or he'd called someone to take him. He could have woken Dean, though. Dean would have taken him, even though he certainly hated the police.

"They say it was murder, Dean," Sam murmured, pulling back as he rubbed at his eyes. "Someone killed him. Someone managed to get into _jail_ and kill him. What if…" His brows furrowed worriedly, his lower lip trembling somewhat. "What if they come after _us_, too?"

"Why would they?" Dean asked, frowning, even though he had to admit that the thought had definitely crossed his own mind more than once. It just wasn't right for his little brother to think that way, to be this fearful. "We aren't connected with him in any way but blood. We didn't do anything wrong, Sammy."

He was adamant about that. Sure, he'd gotten Justin locked away…but it had been his uncle's own doing that had ultimately led to his downfall. And Dean certainly wasn't going to hold much sympathy for the guy that had killed his mother and had tried to kill him on more than one occasion.

Sam nodded slowly and then paused. "But what if?"

"Don't be so negative," Dean chided lightly, nudging his brother with his shoulder. "Everything's going to be okay, you'll see. I promise."

Sam nodded again, tears still gleaming in his dark eyes. They were red and somewhat puffy from his crying, and Dean's shirt had a damp patch on it, but he didn't mind. He would gladly hold his crying brother, as it was his duty as an elder brother to calm his brother's fears and help him when and if he could.

And that was what he did.

It was what he did best, being a brother.

* * *

Castiel lay in his room, thinking. Dean's birthday was nearly there and they still didn't have enough money. He was sure they were going to have to put things off for a while, until they had enough money to get a decent place and they could afford everything. He didn't like that they had to put things off but he knew it would most likely be necessary. Hopefully, though, they would get enough money soon enough and then they could be together all the time and Castiel would always wake up to Dean's amazingly wonderful warmth, a sensation that could only be classified as _Dean_.

A faint smile ghosted across his face at the thought, the memory of the feel of Dean's body against his. He thought back, for some reason, on the first time the two of them had ever been together in a sexual way, how nervous he'd been and how gentle Dean had been with him, letting him pick the pace. Dean had been wanting to get into it for a while but had been patient with Castiel, for which he was grateful. Still, though, the first time with Dean in such a way had been completely wonderful and it still sent tendrils of want and pleasure racing through him at the mere thought of it.

He shoved the thoughts away for the time being, though, as a car pulled up outside. It wasn't Dean's - no, Castiel knew the distinct sound of the Impala and her fine engine, the engine Dean liked to tune up himself when he could. Dean was a great mechanic, after all, which was partially how he'd gotten his mechanic job in the first place, even if he'd been a little young for the mechanic shop's tastes. John had done a little talking, though, and then Dean had been in and he'd gotten a job that he actually liked and was pretty damn good at. At the time, Castiel had been happy for him…but he'd also been a little dismayed because, unfortunately, it had definitely cut into their time together.

And Castiel loved being with Dean. He loved the feel of Dean against him, the warmth of his lips, the rumble of his voice…everything. He loved everything, and maybe that sounded rather corny, but it was true.

He could hear people talking downstairs. The people must have been here for his parents, then, which made him sigh. His parents were still fighting, more and more all the time, but they'd been relatively getting along lately…but maybe that was just because they'd learned to keep their voices lower when they argued because they'd taken notice of the bags under Castiel's eyes from his many sleepless nights. Maybe Jimmy had said something - Castiel didn't know.

He wanted to call Dean, but it was still early and Dean had worked last night. He'd probably be sleeping in, since it was Saturday.

There was a knock at his door. He stood to answer it when the knob twisted and the door opened. "Cassie!" an enthusiastic voice cheered, and he found himself enveloped in a massive bear hug, his arms held hostage at his sides.

"Gabe?" Castiel murmured when he was released. Gabriel Ramsey was his cousin, a year younger than him. It had been a while since Castiel had seen his cousin, since he lived halfway across the United States - what had it been? Years? He wasn't too sure but it felt like it. Gabriel was a short guy, a few inches shorter than Castiel, with longish, shaggy brown hair not unlike Sam's, his brown eyes watching Castiel with amusement.

"Haven't changed much, have you, Cassie?" Gabriel asked, chuckling. "How have things been? What's it been, two years?"

"Probably," Castiel told him. "I'm pretty good - what are you doing here?"

It wasn't like Gabriel would just randomly come up for a visit, after all.

"Is Michael here?" Castiel asked.

Michael was Gabriel's older brother, who was two years older than Gabriel and a year older than Castiel. The four of them - him, Jimmy, Michael, and Gabriel - had grown up together and he'd been stuck as a middle child, along with Jimmy. It certainly hadn't been that fun, being the middle child, but being with his cousins had been rather enjoyable. There was always someone to hang with, after all.

"Yeah, can't go anywhere without Mikey," Gabriel said, chuckling. "He, Mom, and Dad are downstairs. Your mom said you were up here." He shrugged.

"…What are you guys doing here?"

"Well, my school had a sewage problem so we're out for a few weeks. Awesome, huh? And since Mikey graduated already, he's free. So we decided to come for a visit and visit the new town. How do you like it here so far?"

"It's fine," Castiel said.

"I hear you've got yourself a boyfriend." Gabriel winked at him.

Castiel narrowed his eyes. He was going to have to seriously kill Jimmy.

"Relax," Gabriel said, smirking. "I'm not going to tell anyone. So who is? Huh? Details! But wait, I need sustenance." He whipped out a candy bar quicker than a gunman could pull a rifle. Castiel suppressed the urge to roll his eyes, because Gabriel always came prepared. He always had candy on hand yet he never seemed to gain any weight with his freakishly high metabolism.

"What do you…want to know?" he asked, shifting a little uncomfortably. It felt weird to be talking about Dean to his cousin, but it was obvious Gabriel wasn't going to let the matter drop. He never did once he got started on something, as Castiel had found out the hard way while growing up.

"Name?"

"Dean."

"Just Dean?"

"Dean Winchester." Castiel scowled. Gabriel was so nosy, but then, he always had been, even as a little kid.

"Cool, like the gun," Gabriel said, smirking as he chewed at his candy bar. It was making Castiel hungry, watching him eat the delicious chocolate. "He in your grade?"

"Yeah, he's a senior too."

"How long have you two been together?"

Castiel paused and listened to make sure his parents weren't coming by. He was sure they already knew - Jimmy had a big mouth - but just in case, he didn't want to let them know until the right moment. He would officially let them know one day, when he and Dean moved in together. "A little over a year," he told his cousin.

Gabriel's grin grew wider, if that were possible. He looked like a manic version of the Cheshire Cat. "Done the deed yet, Cassie?"

A blush tore violently across Castiel's face and he quickly looked away.

"Really?" Gabriel laughed. "Aw, little Cassie's growing up!"

"I'm older than you," Castiel said. "And besides…what does it matter if we have or not?"

"But you have," Gabriel said, smirking. "It's written all over you face. Was it good?"

"I'm not going to bother answering that."

"Ah, so it was, then. Cool. Can't wait to meet him!"

"What?" Castiel blinked at him stupidly.

"Well, I _am_ going to meet him, aren't I?"

"…How long are you guys staying?" Castiel asked.

"I don't know. Few weeks, maybe? Until they decide to clean up the school." Gabriel chuckled loudly, his candy bar now gone. "You should call him and have him come over. I need to interrogate him."

Castiel frowned. "Now it's the cousin-lecture?"

"But of course, Cassie," Gabriel said, grinning.

"Stop calling me that." Castiel scowled heavily at him.

"But you know you love it."

"Liar."

Gabriel shrugged. "So when am I gonna meet him? Do your parents know?"

"I, um…I don't know," Castiel told him honestly. "I haven't told them, but…"

"They might know?"

Castiel nodded slowly.

"Well…I won't tell them, just in case. When's he coming over?"

"Um…maybe tomorrow. After Drama Club."

If Castiel could convince him to come meet his cousins, that was.

"Drama Club?"

"Yeah…"

"Do you like it?" Gabriel asked, producing yet another candy bar. He tore into it immediately, not even bothering to ask if Castiel wanted any.

"It's pretty fun."

"Dean in it?"

"Yeah…it's where I met him, actually." Memories of his first day played through his head, of how Dean had crashed into him while trying to escape a scene where Ruby had to slap him. He mentally chuckled at the thought.

"Cool." Gabriel grinned. "Happy for you, Cassie."

"Stop calling me that."

"Okay…Cassie."

Now he was starting to sound like Dean.

He thought the two of them would probably get along.

Which would mean double, hyper trouble for Castiel. Joy.

* * *

So...good, bad? lol I tried to make Gabriel's character somewhat like the Gabriel in the show and yet also of my own creation...? If that makes sense? lol anyway. Thank you for reading and please continue to review! I will try to have the next chapter up sooner! Thanks again!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	8. Chapter 8

Sorry it's taken me so long to update! I was just too lazy to write it, haha. I still don't think this chapter's that great...I'm very tired at the moment, and so...yeah, lol. But anywho, I know where I want to take this story, it's just a matter of writing it down and getting there, lol. Thank you all so much for reading and for your lovely reviews! I hope you will continue to leave them! They are what make me want to update :D

Thanks again!

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Eight

Dean's hands flitted across his chest slowly, a seductive twist of his lips causing Castiel to feel hot all over as he swallowed thickly, immediately following after his boyfriend as Dean walked away, toward Castiel's bedroom. Dean pulled his shirt off to reveal his finely toned chest and arms, the brilliant tan hinting at his time spent in the sun. The tan even lasted through the winter, which Castiel found amusing and intriguing at times. As their mouths met in a light touch, Castiel let his hand trail-

_BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP_

Castiel's eyes shot open as he quickly sat up in his bed, his heart racing wildly as he swallowed, glaring at his loud alarm clock for interrupting such a wonderful dream. He combed his fingers through his hair and scrubbed his hand across his face as he struggled to gather his thoughts. What the hell had he just been dreaming? He hadn't had a dream like that in a while now, he had to admit. He wasn't sure what it meant but he figured it had something to do with the fact that he and Dean rarely got to get together anymore, what with the jobs and their families and everything. It was grating on his nerves.

He didn't like being deprived of his Dean-time for any reason, after all.

Sighing, he got out of bed and shut off his alarm clock, wishing he could have slept in for just a little longer so he could finish the dream. It seemed to have been going in a pleasing direction, after all. Grumbling to himself, he dressed and combed his hair before he went downstairs to eat some breakfast. He always set his alarm clock so he would wake early and have time to relax and eat before Jimmy took them to school. Jimmy wouldn't be up for another twenty minutes yet, after all, unless he decided to shower before they went to school.

He had just entered the living room when there was a knock on the door. Soldier jumped up from the couch, where he'd been sleeping, and ran toward the door, happily wagging his tail as he whined slightly, clearly liking whoever it was that was there. Castiel frowned because why would anyone be here so early? He shrugged to himself and strode toward the door, slowly prying it open. Then a wide grin spread across his face as he leaned forward and pressed his lips against Dean's.

Dean grinned and kissed back in kind, sliding his arms around him. "It's always nice to be greeted like this," he commented with a chuckle, causing Castiel to roll his eyes as he stepped back to give Dean some room.

"What are you doing here so early?" Castiel asked, a little confused, but he had to admit that he was happy to see him.

Dean shrugged. "Sammy didn't wanna be stuck at the house…" He bit down on his lower lip and then shook his head. "He's been in a bit of a funk, I guess, and I just thought I'd take him out for breakfast or something before school. And since I was already out…" He smirked at Castiel. "I thought I'd come and get you too, since I know you get up early anyway."

It was nice that Dean knew him so well. Castiel grinned. "Sure, I'll grab my jacket. Hold on." He grabbed onto Soldier's collar and began leading his dog toward the kitchen, where he quickly poured him some food and then grabbed his jacket from where it was hanging on one of the chairs around the kitchen table. He swiftly left the room and returned to Dean, who was standing in the doorway. "I'm ready," he announced with a smile.

Dean nodded. "C'mon, before Sammy changes the music or something."

Sam was always complaining at Dean's music, even though Castiel knew he liked it anyway. He nodded and followed after Dean, climbing into the passenger seat of the car while Sam relocated to the back, fastening his seat belt. Castiel did the same as Dean revved the engine and pulled away from the curb.

"Morning, Sam," Castiel greeted.

Sam nodded. "Morning," he said back, sounding tired. Dean had said he'd been in a funk, after all. Plus he was a teenager…and was apparently going through a phase, as Dean kept saying.

"Where to?" Castiel asked.

Dean shrugged as he stopped at a red light. "Doesn't matter to me," he told them. "Name the place and I'll drive there."

Sam just shrugged in the back seat, looking sullen as he kept his gaze locked downward, away from prying eyes. Castiel frowned and then shook his head at Dean. "I don't care," he told him. "Wherever is fine with me."

Dean sighed and nodded, turning up the music a little as they drove through town.

They wound up stopping at the local café they frequented. They got their usual table and sat there quietly as they ordered. Dean looked out the window and into the darkness, since it was too early for the sun to be up. That was one of the reasons why Castiel hated getting up for school, especially during the winter. The sun was never up then.

Plus it was cold. He didn't much care for the cold or the snow.

"So," Dean started casually, obviously not caring for the silence that was surrounding them at the moment, "what's new?"

Castiel shrugged slowly. "My cousins came for a visit…"

"Really?" Dean's eyes shifted toward him, giving him his full attention.

"Yeah…I don't know how long they're staying, but…" He paused momentarily. "Gabe, my cousin…he wants to meet you, if that's okay."

"Uh, sure," Dean said awkwardly, shifting a little uneasily. "When?"

"Um…today after Drama Club?" he asked.

Dean sighed. "I'm not going to be able to go to Drama Club today," he said apologetically. "Sammy's got something going on at school and I promised I'd be there." He smiled fondly at his little brother as he lightly rested his hand on his shoulder, causing Sam to look up at him thankfully.

Castiel nodded slowly. "That's fine." He knew family was important to Dean, especially Sam's school functions and everything. "Another time, then."

"Sure," Dean said, "I'd be happy to the meet your cousin."

"I'm sure you two will get along nicely."

"What's he like?"

"Gabe is…friendly, I guess you could say. And he always has chocolate stashed somewhere on his person."

Dean chuckled faintly. "Sounds like my kind of guy. Maybe we can get together this weekend or later in the week or something," he suggested.

Castiel nodded again. "Sure, that sounds fine."

He was a little disappointed that he wouldn't get to see Dean outside of school for a little while, but it wasn't like there was much he could do about it. He would take what he could.

Gabriel would just have to meet Dean later.

* * *

Dean cheered loudly as Sam nailed the final question at his academic meeting, bringing his school and his team to victory. His little brother was so smart! He simmered with pride as he watched one of the judges hand his baby brother a medal. Sam grinned wider than he had in a while now, which made Dean happy. Sammy deserved a little happiness, after all.

He moved through the crowd and approached his brother as Sammy got off the stage, thrumming with excitement, that wide smile plastered firmly on his face. Dean wrapped his arms around his little brother and murmured, "Congrats, man. You did a good job."

Sam beamed at Dean's words. "Thanks!" he said happily. Dean chuckled and released Sam, ruffling his little brother's hair as he did so. Sam scowled at him and pulled away, fixing said hair. "Jerk," he said lightly.

"Bitch," Dean returned with a smile. It was good that some things could still be normal even though what was happening around them, what with Justin being murdered and the worries that went with it.

He slung an arm around Sam's shoulders as he began leading his brother out of the crowded area. Their father rarely ever came to any of these events, mostly because he couldn't see and since that fire, he'd mostly been closed off. He didn't like going out unless necessary and he especially didn't like being in rooms full of people, crowded and everything. Dean could understand it, but still. Sam was only going to be a kid for so long, and John really should come and see him, or at least that was what he thought.

"Go out for a victory dinner?" Dean asked, smiling at his brother as they climbed into the Impala.

Sam nodded and opened his mouth to reply but was interrupted by the ringing of Dean's cell phone.

Dean sighed and looked at his brother apologetically as he pulled the phone free from his pocket, brining it to his ear. "Hello?"

"Dean."

Dean frowned. "Dad? What's wrong?"

"You need to come home immediately. Drop Sam off at his friend's - we have a lot to talk about. It's important."

"What? Dad, what's going on? What do you mean?" Dean asked worriedly, shifting his gaze toward Sam, who was frowning at him in return. His father was really beginning to make him nervous. There was just something off about John's voice, something he couldn't quite place, and he didn't like it, not one bit.

"It's about your uncle," John told him seriously, his tone grim which only made Dean worry all the more.

"What do you mean? What about him?" he asked quickly, wanting and needing an answer as his heart started to race in his chest.

"We'll talk when you get Here. Drop Sam off first and then come straight home."

John hung up on him and Dean slowly pocketed his phone, frowning.

"What's going on?" Sam asked. "Is everything okay?"

"I honestly don't know, Sammy," Dean replied honestly as he swallowed thickly. "But I don't like it. At all."

* * *

Dean entered the house slowly, wondering what was waiting for him. He'd dropped Sam off at his friend's house and had taken his time in driving home, wondering what was going on and why John had sounded as he had. What did he want to talk about that Sammy couldn't be there to hear? It didn't quite make sense but it put a bad taste in Dean's mouth and left him with a tight knot in his stomach.

"Dad?" he called as he entered the living room and found John on the couch, looking solemn as he held his hands together in his lap as he sat hunched forward. He turned his head up as Dean entered the room. "What's wrong?"

John sighed tiredly and Dean sat down next to him.

"What's going on? What about Justin?"

John bit down on his lower lip. Dean knew all of this was hard on him as well. Justin had been his brother, after all. He himself couldn't imagine if it had been Sammy to do those horrible things and then get killed while he was in jail. The thought sent a shiver coursing through his body.

"Dad?" Dean murmured with a frown. "Talk to me…what's going on?"

"I have some bad news."

"Bad news?" Dean repeated. "Like what?"

"The police are afraid that whoever killed Justin…" John bit down on his lower lip and sighed heavily. "They're afraid that they may come after us. They received a letter two days ago that they think may have come from the killer or someone close to them. They don't know who it is or why, but…The bottom line is, they think they may come after us. They are willing to bring us into protective services but that would requiring leaving everything behind here and moving."

Dean stared at him. What his father was suggesting was crazy! There was no way he was moving or leaving everything behind! Cas was here…his life was here. He didn't want to go anywhere. "Dad…"

"I told them I didn't think that would be such a good idea," John said, cutting him off, "but they're being rather persistent. They have agreed to see how things go for the time being, and if they're wrong and the killer…doesn't take an interest in us, then everything's fine. But…if…They might make us move."

Dean bit down hard on his lower lip. He was right - he didn't like this at all.

"So just…be ready, okay? If they make us move for our safety, there's not really much I can do about it, Dean. And you can't do anything either. I know you love it here and your life is here, but…there are some things we have to accept because we can't change them."

Dean knew, on some level, that his father was right. And maybe moving would be what was best for their safety, for Sammy's safety, but…Dean wasn't so sure he could do it. He didn't _want_ to do it. He didn't want to move and leave Cas. _Cas_. He couldn't do that. He loved Castiel, after all, like he had never loved anyone else before in his life.

And he couldn't leave that behind.

He prayed it didn't come to that, because he wasn't so sure what he would do if it did.

"So prepare yourself," John cautioned. "Because you never know…And if we stay, Dean…you may be putting Castiel in danger…I just want you to think about that."

Dean swallowed thickly. He knew John was right and he in no way wanted to _ever_ put Castiel in any kind of danger, but to just leave…? Even if it was for the safety of his friends and people he was close to, he wasn't so sure he could do it…

But what if he didn't have a choice?

* * *

Sorry if it's rushed...I just really wanted to get this chapter written since it's been so long, haha...and I'm really tired...heh...anywho, thanks for reading and please continue to review!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	9. Chapter 9

Haha you know what I noticed? Every time this story is updated, it's the same day one of my favorite stories is updated on this site...haha connection? Probably. Every time that story is updated it puts me in a really good mood, haha. So, if you want this story to get updated soon, go pester them, yeah? lol.

Haha anywho...

Sorry for the wait, I guess.

This chapter came out differently than I would have thought, but I guess it's still okay, lol. Thank you all so much for your lovely reviews! I really appreciate it and it makes me want to write more!

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Nine

"Sit down," Castiel said with a scowl as he grabbed his cousin's arm and tugged him down so he would sit properly on the bed next to him. The two of them were waiting for Dean to arrive, and Gabriel was being his usual hyper-active self. He wouldn't sit still and even though Castiel was sure he had some chocolate stashed somewhere on his person, he wasn't pulling it out and he wasn't sharing.

"Sorry," Gabriel said with a wide grin. "I'm just excited to meet your boyfriend! This is like your first relationship ever, right, Cassie?"

Castiel shifted a little uncomfortably because that was mostly true. Unless the girl in first grade counted when she'd kissed him on the cheek and had stated that they were going to be wed by the second grade. Of course that had failed to happen, but still. He was sure it didn't count, and that did mean that this was his first real relationship.

"Aw, don't be embarrassed about it," Gabriel chuckled, lightly nudging him with his elbow. "So, tell me, how awesome are the sexy times, exactly?"

Castiel quickly flushed red. "Gabe!" he hissed, shoving at him lightly.

"What? I'm curious! It's not often I see you this interested in someone, Cassie!"

"God, you're just like a teenage girl," Castiel grumbled, scrubbing a hand over his face as he tried to hide his embarrassment. He couldn't wait for Dean to arrive, but he hoped that his face would go back to its original pale color by then. He didn't even want to think about what would happen if Dean were to find out about his embarrassment.

"What's to be embarrassed about?" Gabriel asked with a casual roll of his shoulders. "You love him, right?"

"I am _not_ talking to you about this," Castiel muttered, crossing his arms over his chest in an effort to show his stubbornness so Gabriel would end this conversation.

But if there was one word to describe Gabriel, it was 'determined'. He didn't stop until he got what he wanted.

"Why not? I'm your favorite cousin, right?"

"Michael's looking pretty good to me right now," Castiel told him with a sigh.

"Aw, that hurts, Cassie," Gabriel said with mock hurt, placing a hand over his heart. "It stabs right here. You wound me."

"I can't believe I'm introducing the two of you…" Castiel collapsed backward on his bed, sighing as he stared up at the ceiling. "This is going to be a disaster."

"Nah, I doubt that," Gabriel said, smirking as he leaned over Castiel and poked him in the chest. "Get up. We have much to discuss before lover-boy gets here."

Castiel glared up at the ceiling. "Can't we just wait in silence like normal cousins?"

"Pfft, since when is that normal? And if it is, since when are _we_ normal? Me? I'm shocked, Cassie. C'mon, let's talk and gossip."

"Only you would think that was interesting," Castiel grumbled as he sat up finally, knowing a losing battle when he saw one. It was pretty obvious that Gabriel wasn't going to be giving in any time soon.

Soldier stood from where he'd been laying on the floor and approached them, wagging his tail as Castiel put a hand down to trail across his head.

"So, I hear Dean gave you dog for Christmas, yeah?" Gabriel inquired, hiding a smirk but Castiel could see it nevertheless.

"Um. Yeah."

"Aw, how cute."

Castiel shook his head. "Are you sure you're not some teenage girl in a guy's body?"

Gabriel rolled his eyes. "So, are you going to start talking or what?"

"Or what."

"Cassie."

"Don't call me that."

"C'mon. Otherwise I will just have to bring this up while Dean's here and embarrass the both of you."

Castiel narrowed his eyes. "You wouldn't."

"I would," Gabriel said smugly. "So talk."

Castiel sighed heavily, his shoulders slumping in defeat. "Fine," he mumbled.

"Goody." Gabriel whipped out a candy bar and tore at the wrapper, quickly opening it to gnaw on the fine chocolate. As usual, he didn't offer any to Castiel.

Figures.

"What do you want me to talk about?" Castiel asked uneasily, feeling nervous. He didn't want to talk to Gabriel about Dean. It felt strange. His relationship with Dean just _was_ and rehashing over small details wasn't going to change anything, right? So why talk?

But it was clear Gabriel wasn't going to be giving up any time soon, and he also knew his cousin meant what he said. He would do whatever it took to get his way. And thus he would certainly bring it up when Dean was there, so it was better to just go ahead and get it over with before his boyfriend arrived.

He couldn't wait to see Dean - he had been acting strangely the past few days, almost a little distant, like he had something heavy on his mind. He'd always been fine in Drama Club, though, almost as though he could relax there or something. Castiel wanted to ask him about it, of course, but he also didn't want to intrude. Dean had been through a lot lately, what with his uncle dying and having to help Castiel whenever his parents started arguing too loudly, and so he just figured he'd give Dean a little time until things settled down. But if things continued, he was certainly going to talk to Dean about it.

"Details," Gabriel said, wiggling his eyebrows.

Castiel rolled his eyes. "Absolutely not."

That was one thing he was certainly _not_ going to talk about, and especially not with his over-eager cousin.

"Fine. How often do you two talk?"

"Uh…on the phone usually every night and then at school and Drama Club, I guess," Castiel said, frowning at him. "Why?"

"No reason," Gabriel said, grinning as he finished his candy bar. He licked his fingers clean. "What's he look like?"

Castiel flushed. "Why?"

"Well, I want to know what I'm getting myself into when he comes over. I don't want to be shocked, do I? Why? Is he hideous?" He grinned.

"No," Castiel said with a scowl.

"Well then?"

"Why do I have to do this?"

"Because I'm your favorite cousin," Gabriel teased.

"He, um…has blonde hair. Green Eyes. Freckles." Castiel shrugged. "So there."

"That's it? You've been dating this guy for like a year and that's all you have to say about his looks?" Gabriel sighed. "Tsk. I have much to teach you, grasshopper."

Castiel narrowed his eyes at him. "What do you mean?"

"Can you not describe him any better?"

"Does it matter? You're going to see him soon anyway. He should be here any time."

Gabriel shrugged. "So? C'mon."

Castiel scowled at him again. "Can't you just leave this alone?" he complained, scratching Soldier behind the ear. Soldier suddenly perked up and ran toward the window, wagging his tail. Castiel heard the sound of the Impala pulling up outside, and smiled to himself, knowing the questioning would end now. Plus Dean was here, and that was always a bonus in his mind. "He's here."

Gabriel stood and looked out the window, smirking. "Impala, eh?"

"Yeah, he loves the car. Don't trash it," Castiel warned, not wanting the two of them to get off to a bad start. If they didn't get along, then there would be some awkward conversations here tonight. Then again, with Gabriel there, things could get awkward either way, really.

Gabriel was supposed to be staying here tonight. It was Friday, after all. Dean was supposed to be staying, too, if things turned out well. Castiel hid a smirk at the thought. He missed sharing a bed with Dean, after all. He liked waking to that warmth.

Sadly, they'd had to push back the date of when they were going to get their own place. They had agreed to wait for the time being, until things with Justin's death died down and they had more money. It just seemed easier that way. Castiel couldn't wait to move in with Dean, though. To him, it couldn't come soon enough.

"Wait here," Castiel sighed as he slipped out of the room and down the stairs to greet Dean. No one else was down there, thankfully. Michael, his aunt and uncle weren't staying here at the moment and his parents were in the kitchen, he believed. And Jimmy? He was probably in his room playing video games or something, he wasn't sure.

He opened the door as Dean approached the porch. Dean looked up and smiled at him, which in turn caused Castiel to smile back just as warmly. He couldn't help it - it was contagious. He slipped his arms around his boyfriend as Dean entered the house and kicked the door closed behind him. Soldier came barking down the stairs, his tail wagging happily as he jumped up to greet Dean. Dean chuckled and scratched at the dog's furry head.

"Nice to see you too," Dean said with a smirk to the dog, and then he shifted his gaze toward Castiel, letting him know the words were for him as well. Castiel smiled.

"Glad you could make it," Castiel said.

Dean nodded. "So…where's your cousin?"

"My room," Castiel sighed. "I have to warn you, he's a little…um…eccentric…and strange…and he hordes chocolate."

Dean smirked. "So you've said. Let's see if we can make him fork over some of that chocolate, eh?" He winked and moved toward the stairs, carrying his overnight duffel across his shoulder. Castiel quickly followed after him, with Soldier taking the rear as they traveled up the stairs and down the hallway toward his room.

Dean rapped his knuckles twice against the door and then entered the room, tossing his duffel down next to the door like he always did. Castiel entered behind him and found Gabriel sitting happily on his bed.

"You must be Dean," Gabriel said with a grin, holding his hand out to be shaken. "I'm Gabriel, Cassie's cousin."

Dean's lips twitched in a faint smirk as he held his hand out as well and clasped it to Gabriel's. "I'm Dean. Nice to meet you."

"Likewise," Gabriel said, chuckling. "Cassie has told me much about you…though not as much as I would have liked to know." He sent a look toward Castiel which made him flush as he quickly averted his gaze.

Dean noticed and chuckled, rubbing awkwardly at the back of his neck. "Um…well then," he said slowly. "Do I even want to know?" This he directed at Castiel.

Castiel quickly shook his head. "No. No, you don't. Gabriel's just being his usual self, that's all."

"Right." Dean nodded like he understand, and Castiel thought that maybe he did.

"So, is the Impala yours?" Gabriel asked casually.

Castiel bit down on his lower lip, hoping Gabriel didn't say something wrong that set Dean off about his car. Dean was protective of that thing, after all, and he wanted tonight to go smoothly.

"Yeah," Dean said with a nod.

"I see. '67 was a good year," Gabriel commented.

Dean smirked. "Yeah it was. Nice to see you know your cars. I've tried teaching Cas but he seems to enjoy being ignorant about cars."

Castiel scowled while Gabriel grinned. "Yeah, Cassie's always been like that. Him and cars don't mix."

Dean nodded. "I've noticed," he said with a chuckle.

"I'm still _here_," Castiel grumbled. Dean chuckled again and lightly placed a hand on his shoulder. That was actually a more massive sentiment than Gabriel probably realized, because Dean wasn't much of a touchy-feely person when other people were around. Sometimes in Drama Club and at lunch, sure, but that was around people they basically knew fairly well. To Dean, Gabriel was still mostly a stranger. So the sentiment meant a lot to him and made Castiel smile.

"So, Dean, any siblings?" Gabriel asked as he whipped out a candy bar. Dean and Castiel shared looks and grinned at each other while Gabriel watched them in confusion.

"Uh, yeah, a little brother," Dean told him. "You?"

"Older brother."

"Ah."

"Parents?"

"Just…my dad," Dean said, looking a little confused at the questions.

Castiel rolled his eyes. "Just wait and soon he'll be asking you what your blood type is," he promised.

"Lies!" Gabriel said while munching happily at his candy bar. "Any pets?"

"Nope."

"You got Cassie Soldier." It wasn't a question but a statement.

Dean shrugged and nodded. "Yeah…"

"Enough questions," Castiel said with a scowl. Cousin interrogations were lengthy. Was there soon going to be a cousin-lecture as well? First the brother-lecture and now this? "Who's up for ordering pizza?"

"Dude, do you even have to ask?" Dean said with a warm smile.

Castiel chuckled and grabbed the phone to dial. "I guess not."

* * *

Dean lay awake in bed the next morning, looking up at the ceiling. Mostly it was because he couldn't get back to sleep, but also his thoughts were kind of racing at the moment. Absently, he rubbed his thumb across the hand that was held in his as Castiel lay curled against him, nuzzling into him in his sleep. His breath was warm and welcome against Dean's neck.

Waking like this with Cas was always a treat, he had to admit. He enjoyed it, maybe even more than he enjoyed admiring his car. A faint smile crossed his face before it disappeared. He wished he and Cas could just move in together now or something, because he could really get used to waking like this every morning. However, money was an issue, as was the whole deal with Justin and the murderer.

Dean hadn't told Castiel about the murderer yet, or that they might potentially go after Dean and his family. He didn't want to worry him, after all. Plus he didn't really want to tell Cas that maybe they would have to leave. Dean would do whatever he could to stay, he vowed to himself as he listened to Castiel's deep breaths. He would do whatever it took to stay here with Cas, because leaving wasn't an option. Ever since Cas had come into his life that one day in Drama Club, he hadn't been able to imagine himself without him there. The thought took his breath away.

Sighing, he decided not to think on it too much right now. He wanted to just enjoy the moment.

Gabriel had been quirky last night. Eccentric, as Castiel had said, but he didn't seem like a bad guy or anything. In fact, Dean kind of liked him - he was amusing…and the dude always had chocolate stashed in various places on his person, and that could certainly come in handy.

Gabriel had finally been drawn away by the allure of Jimmy's video games across the hall, which had left Dean and Cas alone together, which was just nice.

Dean pressed a light kiss on Castiel's forehead, smirking as Cas nuzzled into him all the more, giving into a contented sigh.

Yeah, he decided.

He could definitely get used to this.

* * *

Haha quirky Gabe, eh? Lol anyway. Thanks for reading and please continue to review!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	10. Chapter 10

Gasp! I was looking at my stories and I realized it's been over a month since I've updated this! That's 'cause I forgot...haha...the story that's usually updated when I update this one hasn't been updated recently, and I usually updated this story after I read that one, haha. But anywho, sorry for the wait! I hope to write chapter 11 soon, hopefully! Haha. And I warned you it was gonna start takin' a dark turn O.o teehee.

Thank you all so much for your wonderful reviews! They keep this story going like you wouldn't believe.

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Ten

Castiel was happily consumed with things at the moment, things being his boyfriend, who was currently kissing him with soft, pliable lips that were full of love and warmth. Castiel happily returned the kiss and wrapped his arms around Dean, pulling him close. Gabriel had left a few hours ago, and while he loved his cousin like a brother, it was nice that it was just him and Dean at the moment. Plus, they didn't have to worry about making too much noise or people interrupting them. Jimmy had gone out with Gabriel to visit Michael at the mall in the town over.

Which meant they had the whole house to themselves, but thus far, they had seemed pretty intent on staying in the bedroom. It had been Castiel who had started it, pouncing on Dean the moment he heard his brother's car pull away from the house, meaning they were really alone. Well, except for Soldier but he was positioned downstairs, probably chomping away on his food or his new bone or something. That meant Castiel could fully focus on what was in front of him at the moment.

Dean's tongue was warm and slippery inside of his mouth, but Castiel found that he rather enjoyed the feel. Lightly, he tugged at Dean's shirt, hinting at what he wanted, but Dean just chuckled and slid his hands up to run his fingers through Castiel's hair. It felt great, really, and there was a burning heat growing within him, making him somewhat breathless as he crushed his lips back against Dean's fiercely.

Skin brushed against skin and in that moment, Castiel lost himself but he didn't care. It had been a while since he and Dean had been able to be this close without worry of interruption and he was going to enjoy it. He tugged at Dean's shirt again, trying to give him a firmer hint at what he wanted, and Dean smirked, seemingly to finally agree with him as he stepped back somewhat and tugged the shirt away from his body, tossing it onto the ground. Happily, Castiel gazed at his boyfriend and then the two connected again, like burning embers in a passionate fire, their lips like warm magnets as they brushed together.

"Missed this," Castiel murmured, blushing faintly as he spoke the words into Dean's very inviting mouth.

"Same," Dean breathed back. "Cas…"

Castiel loved the way Dean spoke his name so lovingly, so affectionately and yet so full of need. They sank down on his bed, tangled in their web of love. Castiel's heart beat furiously in his chest. His body felt overly hot, but it wasn't a bad sensation, not at all. He especially loved the feel of Dean against him.

"How come I'm the only one shirtless?" Dean complained with a delicate, sly smile.

Castiel flushed and tore his shirt off as well, reconnecting with Dean as soon as possible. The brush of their bodies against each other was enough to have him moaning into Dean's mouth, which in turn only made him blush all the more. How was it that Dean was able to have this affect on him without even trying at all?

He put it up there as a part of Dean's wonderful uniqueness and his unbelievable ability to get him all hot and bothered.

* * *

Dean had left nearly an hour ago, and Castiel was sitting up in his room on his bed, a happy smile still plastered on his face despite the fact that he was alone and wasn't doing anything to be smiling about, just mostly staring at the wall. Being with Dean always left him happy, though.

The front door downstairs slammed open and then closed. Castiel flinched at the sound and then frowned as his parents began yelling at each other. He couldn't tell what they were saying, but their voices were loud, growing louder, and the anger in the words managed to travel all the way upstairs and through Castiel's closed door. He swallowed and immediately the smile fell from his lips. He chewed on his lower lip as he got to his feet and slowly moved toward his door, peering out somewhat.

"I can't believe you!" his mother shouted angrily from downstairs. He edged out of his room and down the hallway quietly, standing at the top of the stairs. Hearing them argue was horrible, but maybe if he understood exactly _what_ they were arguing about, things would be better. Maybe then he would _understand_, because right now, he didn't. And it bothered him.

"Well, I can't believe _you_!" his father snapped back in response. "You're such a filthy whore!"

Castiel flinched.

"Bastard! How dare you!" his mother hissed venomously, and he had never heard her sound so angry in his entire life. "Why don't you just leave! Get the hell out of this house RIGHT NOW! GET OUT YOU BASTARD! GET. OUT!"

For a moment, there was a long silence. Castiel staggered back to his room and closed his door, taking shaky breaths as he scrubbed at his face and eyes, feeling wetness begin to gather there. He knew his parents were fighting, but it had _never_ been like this before! What if they split up? They had seemed so perfect together for so long, and Castiel was used to them loving each other…but now, things were so different. It was almost like they _hated_ each other.

And that scared him. Because they had loved each other so much…and if it had happened to them…then couldn't it happen with him and Dean?

He mentally flinched at the thought and picked up the phone in his room, dialing in the familiar number shakily, his fingers feeling somewhat numb due to his racing heart and pumping blood.

_Pick up, pick up, pick up, please pick up,_ he thought as the phone rang and rang and rang.

"Yeah?" Dean whispered quietly, sounding shaken and tired all in one. Worry sparked with him but all he wanted at that moment was to get _out of there_.

"Can you please come get me?" he murmured guiltily into the phone.

"Cas, I…right now is a really bad time, I'm sorry, I-" Dean stammered apologetically, sounding guilty himself.

"Please."

"Cas, I'm sorry, I'm really tied up right now and I can't-"

Castiel's worry and desperation to get out of there turned into anger when he realized Dean wasn't going to be coming to pick him up. It was irrational but he couldn't stop it, could only growl, "Fine," and then hang up the phone without waiting for a response. He tugged on a jacket and ran out of his room and down the stairs. His parents were in the living room so he moved toward the kitchen, struggling to ignore their snarling voices as they ignored his presence.

"You're such a hypocrite!" his mother was screaming.

"Like you're one to talk!" his father shouted back.

After a moment of brief hesitation, Castiel grabbed a couple of bottles of his father's beer and tucked them away in the large pockets of his jacket, knowing that he would need something to rid himself of whatever it was he feeling inside at the moment. Besides, it wasn't like he was driving, right? He thought he deserved a little release, some time to forget, and this would help him achieve that. It worked for his father, didn't it? So why not for him?

He had never tried alcohol of any kind before, and he knew it was wrong to want to use it now. But he was old enough, right? He knew plenty of people who had started drinking as young as fifteen, and he was older than that. In a few years he would be twenty-one and it would be legal.

Besides, as he told himself, he wasn't going to get drunk or anything. He was just going to try and forget.

Just enough to forget.

He ran out of the house, wanting to escape.

* * *

It had been two hours since Castiel had called. Dean felt guilty about not being able to go get him, even when Cas had begged him to, but the police had been there discussing how they were going to handle the whole 'Jimmy being murdered and the Winchesters possibly having to be relocated' situation, and he hadn't been able to leave, that much had been clear.

He called Cas's place as soon as possible, though, already climbing into his car. He would make up for not being able to get him earlier. He would.

At first, it seemed like no one was going to answer. But then Castiel's mom did.

"Hello?" she asked tiredly, seemingly worn out. Dean knew what that felt like.

"Is Cas there? It's Dean," he told her.

"Oh, um…" There was a pause. "I think he left. He…I think he saw us fighting and…he took off. I'm sure he'll be back later, though, if-"

"Thanks," he said, cutting her off as he hung up, growling to himself.

He had to find Cas and hopefully make things right. It wasn't his fault he hadn't been able to leave, though, right? But then again, Cas was more important than some conversation about relocating. He should have just left to get Castiel anyway, conversation and police or not.

He had to apologize.

* * *

Castiel wasn't sure where he was, exactly. His mind felt all fuzzy and unclear from the alcohol, which was making him feel kind of fuzzy and warm inside, he had to admit. He staggered along the street, unsure as to where he was going or why, only knowing that he needed to keep moving for the time being.

Being angry with Dean for not coming to get him was stupid. He had just hung up on him after growling at him, and he felt guilty about it now. He went down an alley and took another deep guzzle of the frothy liquid he carried with him. He'd already emptied three bottles, but who was counting? It was strangely addictive after a while.

Ha, addictive. Hmm. Castiel cracked a dizzy smile. The world around him felt hazy and unreal, which was strange. Was this why his father seemed to enjoy it so much?

"Cas?" a familiar voice asked as someone stopped and backed up so they were looking down the alley at him. Their voice sounded familiar but not the voice he really wanted to hear, which was Dean's. He looked up at the sound and saw Aeron from Drama Club watching him with a frown. "Is everything okay? What's wrong?" Aeron moved toward him slowly. "Castiel?"

"Mmm," he mumbled, grinning stupidly in response, just happy to not be alone at the moment. He stood and stumbled forward. Aeron grabbed his arm as though to steady him.

"Are you…" Aeron wrinkled his nose. "Drunk? You are, aren't you?"

"Maybe," Castiel agreed with a goofy smile, leaning forward somewhat, his vision blurred. He knew what and who he wanted, in his heart, but his hazed mind couldn't quite tell the difference.

* * *

Dean drove around town, searching for Castiel, but he wasn't finding him anywhere. It was really starting to worry him. What if something happened while Cas was out? What if he wasn't in his right state of mind because of his parents' fight? It would all be Dean's fault for not coming to get him earlier. He would be to blame if something happened, and he prayed it didn't.

"C'mon, Cas, where are you?" he murmured to himself, talking to himself like an insane person. He scrubbed a hand over his face as he stopped at a light.

That was when he turned his head a little and saw Castiel and Aeron standing down an alley. Cas looked more than a little unsteady on his feet and Aeron just seemed confused. Dean swallowed and quickly parked the Impala a little ways away in the first available parking spot, and then ran back toward the opening of the alley.

And then he stopped, his eyes wide as he stared.

Castiel was kissing Aeron.

_Cas _was kissing Aeron. Not the other way around.

Cas was kissing Aeron.

* * *

I really hope the characters aren't too far off? lol I just know that wanting to escape can change your judgement on things...but anyway! Thanks so much for reading! Hopefully I update soon! Please continue to review! Thanks again!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	11. Chapter 11

Sorry this chapter is short, haha. And it's all in Dean's POV, but yeah, lol. Anyway, thanks so much for the review! They make me so happy :D And make me want to update quickly! So please continue to do so! There's maybe about...nine chapters left? Give or take a few? lol not sure, but around there! It's gonna probably be shorter than Hear Me Now.

Anywho, thanks again!

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Eleven

"What the hell is going on here?" Dean asked lowly, narrowing his eyes at the two of them as he stood in the entrance of the alley. Aeron jerked away from Cas and Castiel looked very confused for a moment, before he looked at Dean and stared.

"It's not what you think," Aeron said quickly, holding his hands up defensively. "He's drunk, it's not what you think, Dean."

Dean shook his head. "Lead him to the car, Aeron." Then he turned before he could say something he would later regret. Gritting his teeth, he marched back toward his car. Castiel and Aeron followed behind him slowly in a staggering gait. Dean climbed into his car and revved the engine while Cas climbed into the passenger seat. Aeron bit down on his lower lip and waved them off as Dean pulled away from the curb. "Seatbelt," he muttered to Castiel as the silence consumed the car.

"Dean-" Cas started with a slur in his voice.

Dean wrinkled his nose at the foul smell of alcohol. "Seatbelt," he said again, cutting him off as he continued looking out toward the road and not at Castiel. His grip on the steering wheel was tight, his knuckles beginning to turn white. His fingers began to lose feeling but he didn't care.

"Dean, I'm-"

"Quiet. Let's just be quiet," he said shortly, narrowing his eyes. Talking meant that he would say something he would later regret, and he wasn't willing to do that at the moment. So far, this had been the worst day of his life. As if he didn't have enough to feel guilty about as it was. Now he'd allowed Cas to leave the house and get drunk and kiss Aeron.

A growl formed in his throat at the thought but he swallowed it back down. Cas could kiss whoever he wanted, right? It was a free country. Dean hadn't come to get him and so he'd been angry with him, right? So it was his fault…

He scrubbed a hand over his face and continued driving. Castiel didn't try to start a conversation again, but that was probably because he passed out in the passenger seat. His alcoholic breath filled the car.

_Really screwed up this time, didn't you, Dean?_ he thought with a frown, chewing on his lower lip worriedly. Was he to blame? Cas didn't seem like the type of person to go and kiss people randomly. He was drunk, that was for sure. Even so, surely there had to be a reason he'd kissed Aeron. Obviously Dean had driven him away or something…right?

He dropped Castiel off at his house and helped him inside. Castiel held onto him tightly and Dean swallowed thickly, smelling and practically tasting the alcohol. How had Cas even managed to get a hold of the alcohol, anyway? Why would he have?

_Because I didn't come get him…_ he thought to himself. He should have left to pick him up anyway. Wasn't Cas more important than some stupid conversation about relocating?

He knocked on the front door of the Novak household. Castiel's mom, Bethany, answered, looking tired and worn through. Her eyes went wide when she saw Dean and Castiel standing there.

"What happened? Is that alcohol I smell?" she asked, wrinkling her nose.

Dean nodded wordlessly as he led Cas into the house and helped him sit on the couch. Bethany knelt in front of the couch and looked her son over.

"Is he okay?" she asked quietly.

"I think so," Dean said, "just…drunk. How did he get the, um…alcohol?"

She shook her head guiltily. "I don't know…maybe he snuck out with it when we were fighting…"

Dean nodded and moved toward the door, not knowing what to say or what he was doing there. "I'll just, um…be going, then…" He edged toward the door, watching them to make sure he wasn't needed.

"Thanks for bringing him home, Dean," Bethany said gratefully.

"No problem…" he said. He should have been there in the first place, right? To pick him up so he wouldn't have gone out to get drunk anyway. He shook his head and took his leave, exiting the house and quickly pulling away from the curb once he climbed back into his car.

When he got home, he slammed the door to his room closed without speaking a word to his father or Sam. And if they said anything about it, he didn't know.

* * *

Hours later, there was a faint knock at his door. Dean grunted, not wanting to get out of bed. He'd been lying there since he'd gotten home, just staring up at the ceiling and trying to forget the twist of pain he felt in his heart every time he thought about Cas kissing Aeron. Why Aeron, of all people? Sure, Castiel was drunk, but wasn't that when people gave into their hidden urges? Did Cas like Aeron? Was he getting tired of Dean?

It wouldn't have been the first time someone had gotten tired of him, after all. It seemed that people only stayed in stages. Soon, everyone always left.

And maybe everyone always would.

Sighing, he climbed out of bed when the knocking at his door continued. He pried it open a crack and scowled. "What, Sam?" he asked, if not a bit too harshly.

Sam stared at him, frowning. "Is…everything okay? You've been in your room since you got home. Did something happen? Why did you leave?"

"Not now, Sam." Dean slammed the door closed in his brother's face, locking it. It probably wasn't the best move to make in the world, but at the moment, he couldn't find it in him to care. He was just so confused, and he didn't know what to do or how to fix things. How had things gotten so screwed up so quickly?

He couldn't blame Cas, right? He had been the one to send him in that direction, hadn't he? He had been acting weird lately toward Castiel, and he knew that. He did. But it was only because he was trying to find the right way and the right time to tell him about how the police wanted him and his family to relocate elsewhere for the time being. It was hard, though, trying to tell the person he loved that he might have to leave, that he probably wasn't going to get a say in it.

Maybe it would be better if he left, he decided suddenly, narrowing his eyes. Castiel had enough on his plate right now, what with his cousins in town, school, and the way his parents were fighting all the time…he didn't need Dean there causing more problems or putting his baggage on him.

And because Dean had been hiding it thus far, Castiel had probably thought that Dean just didn't feel like coming to get him and pick him up from the house, when in reality, he hadn't been allowed to leave in the middle of the discussion. The police had required that they all three be present. His father had needed someone there for him to see what the police were showing them because he himself couldn't. And Sammy had needed him there at the time, had been a little frightened at the fact that the person who had killed Justin could potentially come after them as well.

Dean had been forced to be in the conversation. He couldn't have just left his brother and father there alone, right? But still, when Cas had called, sounding so upset, he should have gone to get him.

But he hadn't.

And now things were so messed up.

And he didn't know what to do or how to fix it.

Someone was knocking on his door again. Dean swallowed and stood, knowing that he couldn't just ignore it like he wanted. What if it was important? Plus, he had slammed the door in Sammy's face, and that was wrong on so many levels. His brother had just been worried, after all. Nothing wrong with that, right?

Except that he was the older brother. He was supposed to make sure that Sammy never worried, and especially about him.

He unlocked his door and opened it. John stood there, his eyes bandaged but a scowl plastered on his face.

"You made Sammy upset," John said.

"I know…I'm sorry," Dean murmured guiltily.

_Another thing I screwed up._

"You should go talk to him."

"…Alright." Dean sighed and moved out of his room and past his father. He moved down the hall and to Sammy's room, where he knocked on his door. Sam answered after a moment and frowned at him. "Sorry I slammed the door in your face," Dean apologized. "I just…have a lot on my mind."

"It's okay…wanna talk about it?"

"Nah, I'm good." He definitely didn't want to talk about it. He didn't even want to _think_ about it, but he had to. He couldn't escape his own mind, after all.

"Did something happen?"

"Sam…"

"Was it Castiel that called?" Now Sam narrowed his eyes.

"Yeah, but-"

"I see. What happened?"

"Sam, not now," Dean said quietly. "I'm not in the caring and sharing kind of mood right now. Let's do this later."

_Screw later…how about never?_ he thought.

Sam sighed heavily. "Fine…but don't think you're getting out of this! We're going to talk." He crossed his arms stubbornly.

_Just like Dad…_

Dean scrubbed a hand over his face. "Alright. You win. We'll talk later. Are we good?"

"Yeah."

"Cool. I'll just, uh…be in my room…then…" After a brief moment of hesitation, he turned and stalked back down to his room, where he entered and closed himself in, surrounded by the silence and darkness of the four walls around him.

* * *

Dean did wander out after supper, though. John had saved a plate of food for him, and all Dean had to do was heat it up. He sat at the table in silence and ate alone, not even bothering to turn the kitchen light on.

The light did come on, though, about five minutes after he'd started eating his food. He looked up, blinking at the change, to see Sam entering the kitchen. Sam sat at the table next to him, frowning.

"Do you…really think we'll have to leave?" he asked worriedly, chewing on his lower lip with apprehension.

Dean paused mid-chew and then swallowed. "I don't know," he said honestly. "I hope not."

"Are you gonna tell Cas?"

Dean looked down and said nothing.

"…Did Castiel do something, Dean?" Sam asked after a moment of silence.

"Drop it, Sam."

"Did he? He did, didn't he?"

"No. Now drop it."

"Dean-"

"I said drop it!" Dean snapped, glaring as he stood so quickly that his chair toppled over. Glaring at the chair and then at his half-eaten food and then at Sam, he stalked out of the room.

For the second time that day, he slammed his door shut without a word.

And if Sam had anything to say, he didn't hear it.

* * *

O.o Well Dean seems conflicted, haha. Anyway, thanks for reading! I should have some Cas POV in the next chapter. Please continue to leave your wonderful reviews! Thanks again!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	12. Chapter 12

Hehe first off, you can blame the angsty-ness of the last two chapters on the song I'm listening to, Fallen by Sarah Mclachlan. It's great for getting in the angsty mood!

Second off, people (several of you) have messaged me angrily about what's happened. It is just a story! I meant to have this happen from the beginning. It was one of the only plotlines that have remained unchanged since the beginning of this story. Alright? Every couple has their ups and downs, please understand. You know how Hear Me Now was! It still had a happy ending, didn't it? lol.

Enough about that :D Thank you all so much for your lovely reviews! I apologize for what happened, but it had to be done! lol.

Anywho... Wow three chapters in two days? Gasp! That's a lot for this story, huh? haha.

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Twelve

Castiel's mind felt groggy and slow. He had the worst headache he'd ever had in his life when he woke the next morning. Groaning, he buried his face under his pillow as light filtered through his window, brightening his room. He didn't know what time it was, didn't really care at the moment, only knew that he wanted to go back to sleep to escape the pain of his headache…and the nagging fear that he'd done something horrible, something he deeply regretted, but he didn't know what…couldn't remember.

He groaned tried to smash his head with his pillow. Maybe that would stop the pain, but somehow he doubted it. He was on the verge of a painful memory, but he couldn't quite tell what it was. He didn't really _want_ to know, because somehow, he knew that he'd done something wrong. He wasn't even sure what had happened to have him have this bad of a headache, couldn't really think on it right now, but he knew it was his fault and he hated it. Guilt gnawed at him painfully.

The phone rang shrilly in his ear. He groaned, waiting for someone to pick it up so he didn't have to, but it seemed that no one was home. Either that or they wanted him to answer it. Swallowing, he lifted his head. The phone stopped ringing and he gave into a heavy sigh of relief, wanting to go back to his darkness.

Then the phone started ringing again. Obviously this person wasn't going to stop until someone answered. Groaning, Castiel sat up and shakily reached for the phone, his vision blurred and his balance unsteady.

"Hello?" he whispered faintly once he answered, rubbing gently at his aching head.

"What did you do to Dean?" Sam growled through the phone angrily, obviously displeased with him.

Castiel frowned. "What? What do you mean?" he asked, because he couldn't remember doing anything…but then again, why else would that guilt be gnawing at him so powerfully?

"He came home yesterday from going to get _you_ and he was completely pissed! He snapped at me twice and has been hiding out in his room! What the heck did you do to him?" Sam snapped.

"I…I don't…" Castiel murmured, struggling to remember yesterday through his hazy mind.

His parents had been fighting, he remembered that. It had gotten bad and loud fast, and he'd called Dean…except Dean hadn't come and he'd gotten angry and had taken off out the back door…after taking his father's alcohol…

"I got drunk," Castiel revealed to Sam, still struggling to remember the details, but he really couldn't. It was all pretty much a blur after that.

"What did you _do_?" Sam asked. "Because I doubt Dean would have been that made simply because you got _drunk_."

"I don't…I don't remember," Castiel confessed, combing his fingers through his hair and pulling in frustration as he struggled to think through the fog clouding his mind. The guilt ate at him all the more as he tried to do so - he had definitely done something, then, but _what_? "How mad is he?"

"Very," Sam said with a heavy sigh. "He won't talk to me. He just snaps and walks away. Didn't even finish supper last night."

Crap. That was bad - very bad. Dean missing a meal, even half of it, was never a good thing.

"I don't know what I did…" Castiel murmured quietly. "I don't know how to fix it…not if I don't know what I did."

"Maybe you should come over here," Sam suggested. "Talk to Dean, because he won't talk to me. He's just moping in his room and he won't come out. He just slams the door in my face, and Dad's not here right now."

"Why not?" To Castiel's knowledge, John didn't work.

Sam hesitated. "Just…Justin business, I guess…"

"Oh…I'm sorry."

"It's fine. So are you going to come talk to him? Please?"

"I…Yeah. I'll try to find Jimmy and have him give me a ride or something," Castiel told him. He was going to go over there and try and fix things, find out what he did and make things right.

"Thanks," Sam sighed, "because I don't know what else to do. I haven't seen him like this before."

_I wish I knew what I did…I can't fix it unless I know,_ he thought worriedly, biting down on his lower. "I'll see you soon," he promised. "Keep an eye on Dean for me."

"Alright - just hurry," Sam told him.

"As soon as I can, I'll be there," Castiel assured him.

"Okay…bye."

The two hung up and Castiel swallowed thickly, feeling sick to his stomach.

He was never, _never_, getting drunk again. If this was indeed what a hangover felt like and he had to deal with memory gaps, then he didn't wish to have it happen again.

But then again, wasn't that what he'd wanted in the first place? To be able to forget for a little while?

And in the midst of forgetting, he must have done something stupid.

He just hoped he could fix it.

He wasn't sure what he would do if he couldn't.

* * *

It was harder getting a ride than he'd anticipated. Wherever Jimmy was, he had his phone turned off or something, because he wasn't answering any of Castiel's calls. He had no way to get to Dean's unless he walked, but that was a long walk and he really needed to get there quickly. Walking would only slow matters down and take time, time he maybe didn't have if he really wanted to fix things.

In a last ditch effort, he wound up calling Gabriel's cell phone. He prayed his cousin answered and would do this for him, because he wasn't quite sure what he would do if he didn't.

The phone rang and rang and rang, and for a moment, Castiel was sure that it was hopeless, that Gabriel wasn't going to answer either.

Then his cousin did answer. "Yes, Cassie?" he drawled in greeting, but Castiel wasn't in any mood to mess around.

"I need you to come pick me up and take me to Dean's," he said quickly, urgently.

There was a brief pause. "Is something wrong?" Gabriel sounded concerned.

"I got drunk yesterday and-"

"Whoa! _You_ got drunk?"

"Yes! And I don't remember what I did, but obviously it was something bad, and I have to make it up to Dean! So please come and get me and take me to his place. I'd walk but it's far and I really need to get there in a hurry. Please, Gabe." He wasn't sure what he'd do if Gabriel couldn't take him. This was urgent, as far as he was concerned.

"Calm down, I'll be there in a few minutes," Gabriel assured him.

"Thanks, Gabe, you're a life-saver," Castiel breathed in great relief.

"No problem. Just make things up with Dean, okay? I know how good you two are together."

Castiel nodded even though Gabriel couldn't see him. "I plan to…if I can. I don't know what I did…just hurry, okay?"

"Be there in a few," Gabriel promised. "See you then."

They hung up and Castiel sat heavily on his bed to wait.

* * *

It wasn't a long wait, thankfully, and soon Castiel was on his way to Dean's. Gabriel wasn't saying anything, which was more than a little creepy, but Castiel couldn't think much on it now. His mind was so fractured at the moment that he barely remembered to put his seatbelt on. He had a vague memory of sitting in the Impala while Dean looked straight ahead and flatly told him to put his seatbelt on.

Crap, what he done? It must have been bad…

What if he couldn't fix it? No, he couldn't think like that. He had to be able to fix it, because he loved Dean. He couldn't let something so stupid come between them. Just because he'd gotten drunk and had obviously done something bad, he couldn't let it tear them apart, because he loved Dean too much for that.

Just the thought of losing what they had together scared him more than he cared to admit, and Gabriel must have seen it written on his face, because he grabbed Castiel's shoulder and said, "I'm sure it'll be okay, Cassie."

Would it? Castiel wished he could be as sure as Gabriel.

"Dean loves you," Gabriel said reassuringly, releasing his shoulder. "I'm sure he won't let something you did when you were drunk tear the two of you apart."

Castiel hoped so. He really did.

They stopped outside of Dean's house soon enough, and Castiel all but ran from the car. He stopped with his hand raised, ready to knock on the door, but he heard angry voices coming from inside.

"You can't do that!" Dean was yelling, and it felt good to hear his voice, but it was chilling at how angry he sounded. "That's not fair!"

"I'm your father and you will do as I say!" John snapped.

How loud were they yelling if Castiel could hear them from _outside_?

He knocked lightly against the door after a moment of brief hesitation. Sam answered, tears gleaming in his eyes when he saw him. "Cas," he whispered shakily. "Now isn't a good time."

"You told me to come," he said, staring. Why did Sam look like he was getting ready to cry?

"You don't control me! I'm eighteen!" Dean growled from somewhere inside the house, causing Castiel to flinch. "I'm out of here!"

Sam was pulled out of the way and Dean began to dart out of the front door, only to stop when he saw Castiel standing there. He blinked, looking shocked for a moment, before his face suddenly went flat and expressionless. Castiel swallowed thickly, wondering how badly he'd messed up when he was drunk.

"H-Hi," he stammered, staring at Dean.

"Hi," Dean said back slowly. After a moment of hesitation, Dean stepped back. "…Come in."

Castiel slowly stepped into the house, wondering what they had been arguing about. John was nowhere to be seen. Castiel figured he must have gone to his room or something to cool down. Sam quickly moved out of the way, watching the two of them worriedly. After a look from Dean, he quickly made himself scarce, disappearing into the kitchen. Dean nodded his head in the direction of the hallway that led to his room, and the two began walking there silently. Castiel had never seen Dean like this before, and it definitely worried him.

They entered Dean's room and Dean quietly closed the door behind them. Then he turned to face Castiel, his face still somewhat expressionless. "How do you feel?" he asked evenly.

"I…Hangover," Castiel said guiltily. "I'm sorry for…Dean, I'm sorry for whatever I did when I was drunk. I honestly don't remember it but I know I was wrong, whatever I did, and I'm _sorry_."

Dean paused momentarily. "Do you like Aeron?"

"From Drama Club?"

A stiff nod was his response.

"Um…as a friend, yeah," Castiel said, confused. "Why?"

"Do you _like_ him?"

"No. Why would I?" Something in his stomach twisted uneasily. "What did I do?"

Dean shook his head slowly. "Nothing, Cas…nothing. I'm just…being weird, I guess. It's been a bad day."

"Is everything…okay?"

_Are we okay? Are we good?_

"I guess," Dean replied quietly. "You honestly don't remember anything?"

"No, it's just this big blur," Castiel told him truthfully. "I'm so sorry for whatever I did. I didn't mean it, honest. I was wrong, whatever I did. I'm sorry."

Dean had to believe him, right? Castiel wasn't sure what he'd do if he didn't. He didn't know how to prove it because he didn't even know what he'd done in the first place.

He stepped toward Dean slightly, wanting him to understand that he was _sorry_, whatever he did, he was _sorry_. He just wanted things to be okay again. "Dean?" he asked when Dean remained quiet. He lightly reached out and touched his arm tentatively.

Dean shook his head. "It's fine, Cas…I understand."

Castiel breathed a heavy sigh of relief. "Really?"

"I guess, yeah. And anyway…I don't want to fight. I've had enough of that today. I don't want to be mad."

"…What did I do?"

"Nothing. It was nothing…you were just drunk, that's all."

But it felt like there was something Dean wasn't telling him. Castiel frowned at him. "Are you sure?"

"…Yeah. I'm sure." Dean shook his head and moved toward Castiel, smiling faintly, a tired look in his eyes. Castiel happily allowed himself to be pulled into the tight embrace as Dean's arms wrapped around him like a warm, reassuring blanket.

"Are…we okay?" Castiel whispered nervously.

There was a pause. Castiel held his breath.

"Yeah," Dean breathed finally. "We're okay."

* * *

Um, I hope I captured the personalities and anger and guilt and everything okay? Truthfully I have no experience with doing something bad while I'm drunk...I've never had alcohol, lmao, sooooo yeah. And I've never been in a good relationship, so yeah! The feelings and stuff might be off. Let me know! Thanks again for the reviews, they're what made me want to update so quickly! Please continue to review!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	13. Chapter 13

Haha sorry it's been so long! I really wanted to finish Green Eyes :D And I did. So yay! My computer is being mean and messing up :( But oh well I guess. Uhhhh this chapter is kinda short and full of fluff...O.o I guess that's what mood I was in, lol. Anywho, thanks for all the reviews so far, and please continue to leave them!

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Thirteen

Dean had said everything was good between them, but sometimes Castiel couldn't help but wonder. It had been three days since he'd gone to Dean's, desperate to fix whatever it was he'd done when he was drunk, three days since he'd shown up at Dean's house listening to Dean and his father argue. To this day he still didn't know what they'd been shouting about - Dean had immediately clammed up on the subject and had changed topic quickly, as though eager to leave the matter behind, and Castiel was going to respect his wishes…especially when it already seemed as though he was on uneven, shaky ground with his boyfriend as it was. He just wished he'd never gotten drunk, and that they could go back to how they had been before.

Dean wasn't really treating him any different - he was still kind and loving, and the two talked every evening on the phone if they couldn't see each other during the day, but it just felt like he was more guarded now, maybe a little distant, and Castiel knew, on some level, that it was all his fault. If only he knew what he'd done when he was drunk…but Dean wouldn't tell him.

Maybe, a part of his mind whispered, Dean's behavior had nothing to do with him. Maybe it had something to do with the argument John and Dean had been having when Castiel had shown up at the house, he wasn't sure. Maybe it was a mixture of both - his stupid, drunken mistake, whatever it was, and the argument that had taken place between the two Winchesters. Castiel wished he knew, but unfortunately, Dean wasn't willing to talk about it, and he didn't want to upset him or anger him further by asking about it a lot. So he kept quiet on the matter, wanting to just be there and show Dean how sorry he was and how much the green-eyed man meant to him each time they were together.

Currently, though, Castiel was alone. He was in his room. His father had left the night he'd gone out and had gotten drunk, and he hadn't returned yet. He wanted to worry - maybe on some level he was - but really, he was almost relieved that his father was out of the house. That meant there was less shouting. His mother seemed almost happy for the first time in a long time, more like her old self, and while Castiel loved his father dearly, part of him was glad that he'd left. It wasn't that he didn't want to see his father - it was just that the house was no longer so angry and tension-filled. He no longer woke in the middle of the night to loud shouts coming from the hallway or downstairs. He no longer had to listen to those harsh words spat between his parents when they thought no one was listening. He not longer had to watch them pretend that everything was okay, when clearly it wasn't. And that was good - the fact that his mother seemed at peace, finally. Life in the house was better now, but he did hope his father returned soon…so he could at least see him again.

Soldier was currently running around in his room, full of energy. He had a torn up tennis ball that he kept picking up and throwing through the air. It smacked against the ground with a dull thud and then bounced up a little, causing the dog to wag his tail happily. He was easily satisfied, after all. Sometimes Castiel wished human life could be so simple. Unfortunately, it wasn't, and he was left with much confusion and many jumbled thoughts.

"Good boy," Castiel mumbled as the dog brought the ball to him and dropped it in his open and waiting hand. His fingers curled around the ball, feeling the dampness caused by Soldier's saliva, and then tossed it lightly to the other side of the room. It bounced slightly off the wall and rolled toward his desk. The dog hopped at it happily, pouncing like a kitten with a ball of yarn. Gabriel had kittens once - the family cat, Smokey, had wound up being a female and had shown up after weeks of being missing with newborn kittens, carrying them into the house one by one. Castiel could still remember the little round balls of pink and small tufts of fur, their ears laid flat against their heads, their eyes closed and their mewls high and squeaky.

Soldier barked at him, wagging his tail as he sat before him expectantly. Castiel frowned.

"What?" he asked, reaching out to scratch Soldier behind the ear. "You've got your ball. What do you want now?"

Soldier happily licked at his hand, showing his affection. Castiel sighed and smiled at the dog. He shook his head and lay back on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. Dean should have been getting off work any moment now. Castiel really wanted to talk to him and spend time together, at least for a little while. He was suffering from what he'd dubbed to be 'Dean-less-ness'. That was all he could come up with, anyway.

_I just hope everything is really okay between us,_ he thought with a heavy sigh, struggling to not let his fears get the best of him. He wasn't sure what he'd do if things weren't okay between them. He didn't know how to fix what he couldn't remember.

Why couldn't he remember? Why had he gotten drunk? Who knew he was such a damn lightweight?

Well…none of that mattered, because the fact of the matter was that he'd done something stupid and wrong while intoxicated, something he couldn't remember but nevertheless felt guilty about. He wanted to fix it so badly, but didn't know what to do or how to go about doing so. How could he fix it if he didn't know what to fix?

_I'm really sorry for whatever I did._ He hoped Dean knew that. Surely he did, right? He had said things were okay between them, that he wasn't mad, but sometimes Castiel still wondered. Sitting up slowly, he glanced at his clock and then grabbed his phone, dialing in the familiar number.

"Yeah?" came Dean's voice after several brief rings.

"Hey…I'm not interrupting you, am I?" Castiel asked.

"Nah, I was just on my way home. Are you okay? Is something wrong?" Obviously he'd caught onto the tone of Castiel's voice. It was amazing, really, how well Dean seemed to know him. No, Castiel mentally corrected - how well they seemed to know _each other_.

"I'm good," Castiel told him. "How are you today, Dean?"

"Pretty good, I guess," Dean sighed. "Long day. I'm ready for a hot shower. Are you hungry? We could go out to eat or something, if you want. I mean, we don't have to, but-"

"I'd love to," Castiel said, cutting him off with a smile even though he knew Dean couldn't see it. Hopefully he could hear it in his voice, though. "When?"

"I'll be there in about ten minutes, is that enough time?"

"Sure," Castiel told him. "Just let me get dressed - Soldier tackled me earlier and got dirt all over my clothes."

"I always knew you were dirty at heart," Dean said with a small snicker, and Castiel was so relieved to hear him acting normally after so long of being more distant and guarded. Maybe that meant things really were okay between them. He hoped so, anyway.

"Whatever," he said. "I'll talk to you then - love you."

"You too," Dean said, and then hung up.

Castiel smiled down at the dog. "I'm going out with Dean and you have to stay here." He couldn't help but stick his tongue out, smirking at the way Soldier wagged his tail at the sound of Dean's name. He obviously knew had gotten him and saved him, who had given him to Castiel. He stood and stretching, yawning, before he raided his closet for the seemingly perfect clothes to wear, at least for now.

He couldn't wait to go out with Dean today. It had been a while - days - since the two of them had seen each other face-to-face, and Castiel was having hidden urges to hold him close and kiss him, just like he always wanted to. His dreams were proof enough of that. The thought made him smirk and release and faint chuckle that echoed quietly through the room.

Dean arrived soon enough. Soldier heard his car before Castiel did, and happily bounced toward the window, peering out as Dean pulled up along the curb. Castiel allowed his hand to glide softly along the top of Soldier's head before he exited his room, leaving his door open for Soldier to follow after him if he pleased. But his dog seemed content to watch from the window, a silent observer.

No one was home at the moment - his mother was working and he honestly wasn't sure where Jimmy was. He left the house, locked it up behind him, and then smiled as he made his way toward Dean's car. Dean smiled in return, his green eyes glistening brightly. "Hey," Castiel said as he slid into the passenger seat and buckled his seat belt.

"Hey yourself," Dean said, pulling away from the curb. "Did you find some clean clothes, you dirty boy?"

Castiel rolled his eyes. "Yeah, and I'm not dirty."

"Yeah right."

"Takes one to know one."

Dean smirked. "Touché." He paused. "Where do you want to eat?"

"Wherever." He was just happy to be with Dean for the time being, no matter how sappy that might have sounded - it was what he was feeling, and more than anyone, he liked to be honest with his feelings. Some people called it wearing their heart on their sleeve, or something like that, but to him it was just the way he was.

"Milkshakes, then," Dean said, winking at him.

Castiel smiled. "I can live with that." He could really probably live with anything so long as things were okay between them, so long as he'd fixed what he'd done. And so long as Dean was by his side.

_Stop that before Dean asks if you're a girl again and starts to relentlessly call you Cassie or Cassandra,_ Castiel said with a hidden scowl, refusing to let it overtake his face because Dean, who wasn't part of the conversation in his mind, would only think he was upset or something, and he wasn't. He didn't want his boyfriend to jump to conclusions when things were going so well today, better than they had in a while now. And Castiel was completely happy with that. He knew there was probably some things Dean wasn't sharing - such as what he and John had been arguing about and what he'd done when he was drunk - but he wasn't going to press the matter, wanting Dean to feel comfortable. He knew Dean would tell him when he was ready, just as he'd done before when he'd admitted what Justin had done, and how he came across the bruises and cuts that he'd shown up with various times. Castiel sighed as he thought back on the memory, and settled more into his chair, looking for comfort. Right now, the feel of Dean's arms around him would be nice, but unfortunately, Dean was driving and so that most likely wouldn't happen, not if they didn't want to risk wrecking.

So he settled for just watching Dean instead. Dean seemed to really feel at home in the Impala. His head bounced lightly to the rhythm of the music playing quietly in the background, just a small noise to occupy the empty space between them. His fingers tapped lightly against the steering wheel in time with the drumbeat. His eyes were open wide and bright, his expression seemingly open and happy.

"Take a picture," Dean said suddenly.

Castiel blushed and Dean smirked at him. "Sorry…"

"Nah, I know I'm awesome," Dean said, nodding to himself as though it was a known fact or something. "But you know what?"

Castiel paused, thinking. "What?" he asked innocently.

Dean grinned widely at him, making him feel oh-so-warm inside. "You're not so bad yourself."

* * *

Thanks again for reading! Sorry it's short and fluffy, haha. Please continue to review!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	14. Chapter 14

So sorry it's so short! I just wanted to update and I'm not feeling that great :( Been sick the past few days, waaaaaah! Feel like crap right now, wanna throw up but can't :( Sniffle. I'm gonna have sooooooo much homework when I go back to school...waaaaah!

But here is the next chapter. Hopefully they will start getting longer O.o at least I hope so. lol. Um...yeah I skipped Dean's birthday. I wanted to write it in this chapter but I honestly wasn't in the mood and it was time to move on. lol. But I might write a little one-shot about it or something later on, if you really want to know about it that much :D

Anywho, thanks for reviewing thus far, please continue to do so!

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Fourteen

Dean smiled faintly to himself as he woke to warmth nestled against him, arms trailing around his waist, a body buried into his back. He could seriously get used to this, and he honestly wanted to move in with Cas so they could wake like this every morning…but there was stuff he had to do first. And with the way things were going…Dean grimaced, shoving the thoughts aside. Right now certainly wasn't the time to be dealing with them, because right here and right now, he just wanted to be with the guy he loved. It had been a week since the incident with the alcohol, and Dean was ready to really put it behind him. They all got drunk and did stupid stuff occasionally, right? Castiel had apologized even though he couldn't remember what it was he'd done.

Luckily, Aeron hadn't said anything as of yet. They'd been in Drama Club and he hadn't spoken a word, for which Dean was grateful. Dean's birthday had been four days ago, and now he was nineteen. God, he felt so _old_! They hadn't done much for his birthday, but Dean had managed to sneak away from his family and celebrate quietly with Cas that night, and boy, it had been _awesome_. That was the only way to describe it. They had watched movies, played Twister which Dean had won yet again - as he said, nobody could bend like him and Cas was always inclined to agree, with that amusing sparkle in his eyes - and then they had slept in each others' arms. Cas's mom had agreed to allow Dean to stay the night on a school night since it was his birthday, when she usually didn't allow it…even though they were both adults and didn't necessarily need to really ask for permission. It was the thought that counted, though.

Things were pretty much back to normal, and he couldn't have been happier. He just wished this whole thing about his uncle would disappear. Honestly, he was tired of it all. He hated Justin, and especially now that he was still causing his family trouble from beyond the damn grave. How was it that he managed to torment them like this, even though he was now dead?

Why would anyone want to come after Dean and his family? They weren't connected to Justin in any way except blood. And if they were really after Dean, Sam, and John, then they seriously needed to rethink the situation, because if Dean and them were really connected to Justin, why would they send him to jail? One had to think these things through. But the cops were persistent in that obviously they needed to leave, but why, Dean didn't know. He was old enough to make his own decisions, right? Why did he have to relocate if he didn't want to? Sammy, sure, he could see why he would have to relocate. And John, too, because there was no way they could send Sammy away without their father. But him, Dean? Why did he have to consider leaving? He was an adult, nineteen now, and more than capable of taking care of himself. He could sort all of this out, right?

He hoped so, because he really didn't want to leave. His life was here, and it was high time he set out on his own, right?

Castiel shifted against him, causing Dean to sigh and rolled over, coming face to face with loving, tired blue eyes that blinked open sluggishly. Cas looked cute - not that Dean would ever admit to using that word - when he was just waking up, his hair all tussled, his expression mostly innocent and sometimes confused as he blinked the sleep away. "Morning," Dean said with a smile.

"Morning," Castiel said with small yawn. "Sleep okay?"

"Of course," Dean replied, grinning. "You?"

"Mmm…" His cheeks reddened suddenly. "It's always better when you're around."

"Aw, Cas, keep that up and people might start to think you love me," Dean joked, wrapping an arm around Cas in return, kissing slowly at his neck. Castiel smiled and kissed back, stealing his lips when he went in to kiss his neck again.

"I do love you," Castiel said happily.

Normally Dean was not an emotional kind of guy. Words like that irked him, but when they were coming from Cas, they were okay. In fact, they made Dean smile as he was consumed with a warm feeling. "Love you too, Cassie." He kissed at Castiel's forehead and grinned when Cas wrinkled his nose.

"Don't call me that."

"Okay…Cassandra."

"Dean."

"Not a Cassandra? Alright, Cassidy." Dean grinned and sat up, stretching as Castiel scowled at him. "Anyone here?"

"No - Jimmy stayed at his friend's, remember? And Dad…he…" Cas looked away and shrugged. "Mom's at work."

Dean understood. Cas's dad had left and hadn't yet come back. It was depressing, and it hurt him to see how much this was affecting Castiel. "Right. I'm cooking. Up, up." He jumped out of bed, stretching again.

"You?"

"What?" Dean frowned. "I'm an excellent cook! Ask Sammy!"

"I don't think pie and milkshakes count as breakfast, Dean…" Cas said, but he was grinning and thus Dean knew he was joking.

Dean rolled his eyes and scoffed. "Pfft, maybe not in _your_ world, but in _mine_, they are freakin' delicacies." He grabbed Castiel by his arm and left the room, leading him downstairs. He sat him in the living room, on the couch, and handed him the remote. "Sit. Relax. Watch TV - no porn." Then he thought about it for a minute and smirked. "Okay. You can watch porn. But none of that weird stuff we caught your dad watching that one time."

Castiel laughed, and it was a great sound to hear. "I'm gonna say 'no'."

"And I'm gonna be okay with that," Dean said. "Now, I'm off to play housewife - and I can't believe I just said that, but cut me some slack, I only just woke up not long ago - and make you breakfast. You're gonna be surprised and you're going to _love_ it and admire it and be damn grateful I fed it to you." Grinning again, he disappeared into the kitchen, leaving Cas laughing behind him.

* * *

Castiel had to admit, Dean was actually a great cook. Of course, Dean had cooked for him before - small things, like soup when he was sick, pizza or something - but never a full coarse meal. And yeah, it was good. It tasted delicious and Dean sat proudly next to him, watching him savor every bite. "Where have you been hiding your culinary skills?" Castiel joked between delicious bites of pancakes, sausage, bacon, and a side of eggs - how much did Dean think he ate in the morning? Sheesh. But it was amazing.

"Oh, I just never had need of them. I can't have people thinking I'm great at _everything_, am I right?" Dean asked smugly, wiping his nails on his chest in that 'I'm awesome' sort of way. "I mean, how unsatisfactory would they feel?"

Castiel rolled his eyes. "Right…" He shook his head and continued shoveling food into his mouth. Dean was next to him, doing the same. It was a picture perfect morning, and Castiel wanted every morning to be like this. He couldn't wait until they had enough money that he and Dean could buy a place together and every morning could be identical to this, with him and Dean together, eating breakfast and waking next to each other. A little corny, maybe, but it was how he felt. "What next, O God of Cooking?"

Dean raised his brows in amusement at that. "I was thinking TV, a rousing game of Twister, and then perhaps we could pick Sam up and go play laser tag later. If you want to, that is."

"Sounds perfect," Castiel said, because it really did.

"I'll just have to go home and shower first, change my clothes…Check in on Dad."

Castiel nodded. "Alright."

But before he had to share Dean with Sam, he was going to enjoy himself for the time being.

* * *

Castiel was at his house, waiting for Dean to return from his shower and checking in on his family. Everything had gone perfectly today, and he was a little surprised by it. He couldn't imagine a better day even if he tried. If someone had told him that one day he would feel like a glob of Jell-o around another guy, he would have laughed in their face at the craziness. But now…he couldn't picture it any other way.

He sighed to himself and flipped through the TV channels. Nothing of interest was on, but he had to do something to pass the time. Dean had already been gone for nearly twenty minutes. He hoped Dean returned soon so they could play laser tag, with Sam in tow. They hadn't been to play laser tag since that first time, when he had still been coming to terms with the fact that he had feelings for the green-eyed Winchester.

The phone started ringing and Castiel sighed again, standing as he paced across the room, toward where the phone had been left near the TV. He pressed the green 'TALK' button and brought it to his ear. "Hello?"

"Don't freak out," Jimmy said quickly, seemingly out of breath and in a panic.

Castiel frowned. "Jimmy? What…What do you mean? What's going on?" he asked worriedly, clutching tighter at the phone.

"There's been a fire, Cassie."

"Fire? Huh? At Roger's?" That was the friend Jimmy had stayed with the night before.

"No, Cassie…at the Winchesters'. They're calling it arson."

"They're…_what_?" Castiel gasped, barely able to choke out the word through his suddenly clenching throat as the words swirled around in his head. A fire at the Winchesters'. Arson. "Dean? Sam? John? Are they okay? Jimmy?" He had to know.

"John wasn't home at the time, he was with the cops, talking over some stuff apparently."

"Dean?" He swallowed thickly. "Sam?"

"They're at the hospital. I'm on my way to pick you up. Don't freak out," Jimmy repeated, and then abruptly hung up, leaving the dial tone ringing loudly in his ears.

_Fire…Dean…Sam…in the hospital…No, no, no. Not again._

Castiel sank to his knees, dropping the phone next to him as he released shaky breaths. He didn't know what to do, how to react, or where to start. The day had seemed so perfect…and now this.

Dean or Sam could be dead. No, they wouldn't have taken them to the hospital if they were dead. They were alive - but most likely hurt, injured greatly, burned…

Why had this happened?

* * *

Hmm to me, Dean just seems like he'd be an awesome cook. I mean, if he practically raised Sam, wouldn't he be a good cook? Spaghetti o's had to get old! lol. Anywho, thanks for reading, and please review!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	15. Chapter 15

Well...this chapter is a little longer than the previous two? heh. I tried to make it a bit longer, but I thought I kept you guys waiting long enough. Sorry for the tone of this chapter, I guess it's just the mood I'm in.

If you haven't heard yet:

My papaw is in a coma and is dying. His stupid family didn't contact us to tell us, finally, where he was until like late Saturday night and we went to see him Sunday. So I've been depressed all week, and so has Mom, and I've stayed home from school. Now I'm going to have to deal with his family when he passes. It's going to suck so very much. So, if I haven't been around much lately, you know why. I will try to update quicker, but it really just depends on what mood I'm in. Generally, this story has a more happy/fluffy tone (at least I think so) and thus I usually have to be in a good mood to write it...

Ok...scratch that...Dad just told me he passed away...so...yeah...:( Time to cry for about...four years? Yeah. Then I'll be good.

Onward...

* * *

Chapter Fifteen

_No._

That was all Castiel could think as he waited for his brother to pick him up. How long had it been since he'd hung up the phone - or rather, had dropped it and the battery had popped out? Forty years? That seemed about right. But a glance at the clock assured him that only a minute and a half had passed by since then, and he felt like clawing his eyes out and pulling at his hair in frustration. His breath came in short, quick gasps as he struggled to keep himself calm, but damn it, it was hard. How was he supposed to be calm and 'not freak out' when he'd just been told Dean and Sam were in the hospital? His boyfriend and his boyfriend's little brother.

It just wasn't right. It wasn't fair. Hadn't Dean and his family been through enough already? Why was this happening? Who would have set fire to the Winchesters' house? Why? It wasn't making sense and it was starting to drive him crazy. Everything had been going so well for the first time in a while, and now this? Why did something bad always have to happen?

_Be okay,_ he silently pleaded, unable to form words as the seconds ticked by like hours as he stared at the clock, willing it to move faster so his brother would get there quicker and they could get to the hospital. He had to see Dean. He had to see that he and Sam were okay. He had to find out what had happened. He had to know…

There was a lot he wanted to know. And this waiting was driving him insane.

_Hurry up, Jimmy_.

Not two minutes later, the front door was thrown open and Jimmy stood there, frowning at him. "Are you ready?" he asked. Castiel didn't bother responding as he darted out of the house and toward Jimmy's car. Jimmy climbed in as well and the two sped away from the curb.

"So what happened?" Castiel asked once he managed to find his voice. The words came out shaky and he cleared his throat.

"I don't really know," Jimmy said. "I was just driving by and saw them loading Dean and Sam into ambulances. The police said arson."

"Were they okay?" Castiel asked quickly. "Dean and Sam? How were they?"

"Unconscious," Jimmy answered, and Castiel felt a dark pit tighten in his stomach. Unconscious wasn't good. He remembered the last time Dean had been in the hospital after passing out in Drama Club after the hit and run, which they had later found out to have been caused by Justin. "I didn't see much, but they were okay…I think. I'm pretty sure. They wouldn't tell me much and they left in a hurry, but they were both breathing. Calm down, Cassie - it's not going to do anyone any good if you panic."

Castiel, on some level, did know that. But that didn't matter at the moment because all he could see in his mind was Dean's still form, the way he had looked when he had been in the hospital form, still and quiet in the large bed, the room smelling of antiseptic and medicine. He shuddered at the thought, and at the thought of Sam being there as well. He cared also for the younger brother, because Sam seemed to be an attachment of Dean. The brothers were close and were together a lot, bringing Castiel along as well. They did a lot with the three of them, just Castiel, Sam, and Dean. He didn't want either of them to be hurt, or worse.

_No,_ he chided himself quickly, _don't think of worse. They're okay, you heard Jimmy. Calm down._

But how was he supposed to calm down when he'd just heard his boyfriend had been unconscious, as well as his boyfriend's little brother? It just wasn't right - none of it was right. This was all so very wrong and he just didn't know what to do. He hated this. He wished he could rewind time and somehow warn Dean beforehand, but he couldn't and he hadn't known before. He knew it wasn't his fault, but he still felt somehow responsible. There was a dark pit hiding in his stomach, twisting and turning and making him feel overly nauseous each time he thought about it, about earlier today with Dean and the food, about this morning, about all their times together, and Sam…

"Calm down," Jimmy said as they pulled into the hospital parking lot. Castiel took a few deep breaths and he did try, but it was hard. All he could think about was all the hardships they'd already gone through, first with coming to terms with the fact that he and Dean liked each other after Dean ran from the kiss, then with Dean getting put in the hospital from the hit and run, then the headaches and the whole police thing that had happened when they'd finally gotten Justin put away…and now all of this. It just wasn't fair. When would all the bad things stop happening? Hadn't Dean and Sam been through enough already? It wasn't right. And that was all Castiel could think as he and Jimmy entered the hospital.

A police officer was standing at the end of the hallway, talking to John, Dean and Sam's father. Castiel swallowed and moved toward them, Jimmy quietly following after him. "John?" Castiel asked quietly.

John stiffened and nodded in his general direction. Bandages were wrapped around his head, shielding his eyes. Even so, Castiel could see some of the marred flesh from the burns that had taken his sight. A part of him wondered, briefly, if Dean and Sam would now wear those kinds of burns, but he quickly shook the thought away. He couldn't think about that right now. "Castiel?" John asked as though for clarification. He sounded tired - overly so.

"Yeah." Castiel took in a deep breath, struggling to say what he wanted. Next to him, Jimmy shifted. "I…how are they? Are they okay?" He desperately needed to know, but yet he was afraid of the answer. What would he do if they weren't okay? What if they…what if they were _dead_?

_Stop that!_ his mind growled. _Stop it. Don't think like that, be positive._

But it was so hard…

"We…don't really know right now," John said roughly. "They haven't told me anything yet."

"Do…what happened? Do you know? Arson?" Jimmy asked as though sensing that Castiel couldn't form the words at the moment. Castiel sent his twin a grateful glance.

The officer touched John's shoulder and then walked away, reaching for the small radio he kept on his belt.

John sighed heavily. "The police think that someone broke in earlier today…and turned on the stove, just the gas. And then…they lit it when the kitchen was filled with it. That would have been about the time Dean got home, or so they tell me. Sammy…was in his room. I'd left earlier to…haggle out some of the Justin business." He took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. "The fire spread quickly, but help responded quickly as well. I don't know how Dean and Sam are. I'm sorry."

Castiel's head felt like it was spinning. How could this be happening? It just wasn't fair! "But why…would someone want to do that? Why would they do that?" He didn't understand. It just didn't add up.

"Has…Dean said anything about Justin?"

"He just…" Castiel frowned. "He just said he died in jail and that the police suspect he was murdered. Why?"

"Well…the police also suspect that…whoever killed Justin will come after us. We were supposed to leave and go into protective custody…but Dean didn't want to. We've been…fighting about it, lately. He didn't want to leave you and his life here. He said he was eighteen and didn't want to go if he didn't have to. And since there hadn't been any signs that the police were right and the person was after us…" John paused momentarily. "We didn't go. We stayed…."

This was all news to Castiel. He stared at John for a long moment, his mind scattered for the time being. The police thought the person was going to go after the Winchesters? Why? And why hadn't Dean said anything? Why hadn't he told Castiel he might have to _leave_? That no, things were _not_ okay. Why hadn't he _said_ anything? Castiel just couldn't fathom it at the moment. Dean hadn't told him. He hadn't even mentioned it, hadn't let him know anything was wrong. Why not?

"I know he didn't tell you," John sighed. "I tried to tell him to. I did. But he…Dean just didn't want to worry you if…there was a chance we could stay and not have to leave. Please don't take it out on him - it's been hard on all of us, and…" He trailed off slowly, his voice a low whisper by the time he was done. Castiel could see this was hard for him.

It was hard for Castiel too. There was a lot he wanted to talk to Dean about, but right now wasn't the time. He didn't even know if Dean was _okay_, let alone able to talk about it, and that was hard to think about. Those horrible images were bombarding him yet again and he couldn't get them to stop.

"When…" Castiel licked his lips and swallowed thickly as Jimmy put a hand on his shoulder as though for reassurance. But the feel was all wrong, because at that moment, the only person he wanted next to him was Dean, like it had been earlier. He just wanted everything to be _okay_. He wanted _them_ to be okay. "When do you think they'll tell us anything?"

"I don't know," John sighed tiredly, scrubbing a hand across his face. "They just…told me to wait. That they'd let me know when they could…"

Castiel nodded even though he knew John couldn't see.

Waiting really was the hardest part. Waiting and not knowing whether one was going to get good news - everyone was okay - or bad news…like that someone had died, or…

But he couldn't think about that. He forced the thoughts away and tried to tell himself that everything was going to be fine.

But after what he'd just heard…he wasn't so sure anymore.

* * *

It was nearly an hour later when someone finally entered the waiting room, where John, Castiel, and Jimmy were sitting. Castiel all but jumped to his feet, desperate for good news as he watched the doctor looked at them. Jimmy stood as well while John just stayed sitting in the hard, plastic chair. "Family of Dean and Sam Winchester?" the doctor asked.

"I am," John said. "That's my son's boyfriend and his brother."

The doctor paused for a moment and then nodded. "Very well, then." He cleared his throat. "Sam Winchester suffered a third-degree burn to his left shoulder and smaller burns around his torso and a few minor cuts and lacerations on his face. He's responding well to medication and we cleaned up the burns and gave him antibiotics. He should be just fine, and should wake within the next few hours."

"That's great," John said with a massive amount of relief. Castiel was also very glad to hear that Sam was going to be okay. It felt like a weight had lifted from his shoulders. "And Dean?"

"Dean suffered a blow to the head from where, we suspect, he was thrown around due to the small explosion that occurred. He also suffered minor burns and lacerations, and he got a pretty nasty fracture to his right ankle. I recommend that he stay off of it for at least 2-3 weeks, and if the pain gets worse, to contact me."

"How's his head?" Castiel asked worriedly, remember Dean's previous head injury from before.

"He suffered a minor skull fracture and there was swelling, but we managed to get that down with no complications. He is currently being kept unconscious for recovery reasons, but we will take him off the sedatives by tomorrow at the latest. He, too, will be fine."

Castiel released a massive breath he hadn't known he'd been holding until then, his legs feeling overly weak with relief. _Oh thank God,_ he thought to himself, and saw the look on Jimmy's face as well. Dean and Sam were both going to be okay.

"Both of your boys were very lucky, Mr. Winchester," the doctor said, stuffing his hands in his giant white coat. "They will both need time to recover, but bearing no complications, they should both be allowed to leave here within the week."

"That's great," John sighed in relief. "Thank you, Dr…"

"Gerald."

"Dr. Gerald, thank you," John said. "Can we see them?"

"They are both resting. Sam is currently already in a room, but Dean is still in recovery from where we relieved the pressure. He, too, should have a room very soon, but if you would like to see Sam for now…"

"That would be great," John said. "Please take me to him." He paused. "Do you boys want to come?"

"Yeah," Castiel said, because he had to see for himself that both Dean and Sam were okay. He would see Dean later, but right now, he did want to see Sam.

"Me too," Jimmy spoke up.

The doctor nodded slowly. "Very well, but don't stay for too long. He's resting right now, and he needs all the rest he can get."

"We understand," John said.

The doctor nodded again and turned to lead them from the room.

* * *

...thanks for reading...please review...bye.

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	16. Chapter 16

This chapter is a little short, but oh well. At least it's here :D

Thank you all so much for your wonderful support from my last chapter. I really, truly appreciate it. It's been a hard week, but I think I'm okay. At first it didn't really sink in. I kept thinking "Oh, next time I see Papaw we should...oh. Right...he's gone." And I kept having to remind myself. He'd been MIA for so long because of his family that it just felt like that still. Like I wasn't seeing him, but I would again someday and he was still out there, you know? But no. He's dead. And it hurts, it really does. I have almost 18 years of memories and they just keep attacking me at the worst of times, like when I'm at school. The funeral was...difficult, kinda.

Get this - his family didn't include us in the obituary, or the funeral. We made our own private ceremony and just said stuff about Papaw because we didn't have a reverend or anything. Mom read my memoir I made for him outloud. I got hugged sooooo many times O.o now I don't want anyone touching me, that's how much I was hugged. Sheesh. It was...um...weird, seeing his grave. The dirt, all padded down but, you know, fresh. And what his family did...I think it's the betrayal that hurts the most, because I spent 4 years with those people. We went to cookouts all the time, moto-cross races, holidays, vacations...everything. And they just turned their backs on us.

I didn't tell him I loved him the last time I saw him. I wanted to. But I had a horrible headache that day (really bad) and so I was pretty quiet. I sat next to him and stuff but didn't know what to say. He was awake and alert and talking but I didn't know what to do or say...I have a bad habit of that. Hospitals freak me out. But I've been in them so much that when someone tells me someone's in the hospital, I'm just like "alright, when are they getting out?" and I'm not really phased. Which sucks. I really miss him. I want him back. But I know he's happy where he is now, with his brothers and Mamaw. He wrote on a little napkin after Mamaw died that he was just counting the days until he could see her again. He kept it with her picture.

If anyone wants to see the memoir (though I don't know why you would) just let me know and I will either send it to you or post it on one of fictionpress accounts, haha. It was just a nice way to get everything off my chest, even though it was written before he died...so it's not really in past tense.

Anyway I am so sorry for boring you with details of my life! It's just that I was moved by the strong response you guys gave me. Thanks so much! It helped.

I will end this long rant and say...

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Sixteen

Sam looked so small in his hospital bed, despite the fact that he had grown like a weed since Castiel had known him. Castiel stared down at the pale form of the normally active teen and frowned worriedly, his brother at his side and John standing in front of him, right at Sam's bedside. Castiel slowly moved around without making a sound and stood on the other side of the bed, looking down at the static figure and the slack face. His fingers reached out and brushed lightly over the skin of Sam's wrist, as though reassuring himself of the younger Winchester's presence, and he felt a little relaxed at the natural warmth of the body. Sam was okay - just unconscious.

So was Dean. They were both fine. They would both be okay. Maybe they were hurt now, but everything would be okay. He had to keep reminding himself of that. They would both be okay and Castiel wasn't losing anyone today, or any time soon. He felt almost like he could breathe again, but he knew he wouldn't really be able to relax until he got to see Dean and touch him and feel for himself that he was there and that he wasn't just some figment of Castiel's hopeful imagination.

Jimmy's hand rested briefly on his shoulder. He slowly tore his gaze away from the slack-faced teen and glanced at his twin. "I'm going to go get something from the cafeteria, give you guys some time…do you want anything?" he asked generously, his expression showing how sorry he was.

But Castiel didn't want people to be sorry. It wasn't anyone's fault except the bastard who had set fire to the house in the first place. If people started saying how sorry they were, then it would make this all the more real and he wouldn't be able to pretend everything was okay. People only said sorry when things were bad, and he had to believe things were going to be just fine. The doctor had told him everything was going to be okay, that everything looked good, and he kept that in his heart as he just shook his head and looked back down at Sam.

There was a thick patch of bandaging on Sam's shoulder, where he'd been burned. His face was a little scratched up but otherwise fine. IV drips were attached to his right arm, the side John was on. Castiel was glad to see, though, that the only machine he was hooked up to was the heart monitor, which showed a steady, even rhythm. Sam was okay. And he would be waking up soon, according to Dr. Gerald.

"John?" Jimmy asked, glancing over at the blinded Winchester.

John gruffly shook his head and gave a noncommittal grunt in reply. His fingers stretched out and wrapped firmly around Sam's wrist as he felt around for a chair with his legs. Jimmy went around and pushed a chair toward him, which John accepted with a nod, and then Jimmy exited the room, leaving them alone with Sam.

"I can't believe this happened," John said, scrubbed a hand across his face. His cracked voice shattered the silence of the room and Castiel looked at him fully. The man looked ruffled. His clothes were rumpled, his hair tussled as though he'd been running his fingers through it far too often, and he just looked tired. Exhausted, really, as though this experience had taken years from him.

"I know," Castiel whispered back in reply, because he couldn't believe it had happened either. He still couldn't believe what he'd been told, that the killer may have been after the Winchesters as well. Dean was probably going to have to leave after this attack, and so even if he wound up being okay, he was still going to get taken away from Castiel, and that thought cut him to the core. It made his throat close up and his chest tighten, and suddenly it was hard to breathe. He took a moment and tore his gaze away and toward the floor, where he stared as he struggled to get his breaths under control. When he thought he was steady enough, he looked back up.

"I'm sorry you had to find out this way," John said sympathetically. "Dean just…I don't think he wanted to worry you unless he absolutely had to. He wasn't sure if…we had to leave. None of use were."

"But…" Castiel said, because he could hear the but in John's soft-spoken words. And he knew he wasn't going to like what he was about to hear. A part of him wanted to shut down his hearing, or shout at the top of his lungs until he couldn't hear the man's next words, but a much larger part forced him to stay quiet and listen.

"But we will probably have to definitely leave now," John said slowly, as though trying to placate Castiel with his words, not matter what the words were. "It won't be permanent."

Sure…it wouldn't be permanent. They could say that, but could they mean it? Because who knew when this guy would be caught, or how many people it actually was, or what they really wanted…For all Castiel knew, if they left, he would never see Dean again, or Sam or any of them. They had become like Castiel's second family and he loved them both dearly, and the thought of never seeing them again…

It hurt. A lot. His eyes stung but he blinked back the wetness.

He didn't know what to say in response to John. All he knew was that it felt like there was a hole gaping in his chest and it just kept growing wider.

It felt like he was losing everything.

* * *

It was nearly an hour later when the doctor told them they could see Dean. John allowed Castiel to go first, saying he was going to go down and get himself a cup of coffee to help calm his nerves. He looked like he needed it, too. He kept twitching in his seat and scrubbing at his face like his skin was itching.

Castiel followed the doctor down a long white hallway. Nurses in scrubs wandered from room to room, occasionally stopping to look over their clipboards before they continued moving on. Castiel ignored them as best he could and focused instead on the doctor. The doctor stopped in front of a door and gestured inside. Castiel nodded his thanks to the man and then twisted the knob and entered the room.

Machines were what he saw first. A heart monitor that showed a slower-than-normal rhythm and a ventilator. A clear mask covered Dean's mouth and nose. It misted briefly when he breathed, and the machine whirred with it. Castiel slowly approached the bed. Dean, too, looked smaller than normal, covered in the thin white blanket in the equally white bed. Maybe the doctors had such white beds and covers and pillows so it would make the patients not look as pale as they would otherwise. Still, though, Dean was pale. His freckles stood out starkly in contrast. His long dark lashes showed easily on his closed eyelids.

Equally white bandaging covered Dean's forehead in a small ring. It almost look like he was wearing a bandana but Castiel knew better. A few of Dean's longer bangs dipped onto the bandaging, showing its dark blondeness. A few IV's stuck out of Dean's left arm, the one furthest away from Castiel, and were hooked to a machine. It looked like a medicine drip but Castiel wasn't sure. Patches of bandaging covered his arms in haphazard patterns, probably from the burns the doctor had mentioned. He almost looked like his arms were sun-burnt. His left ankle was elevated slightly and encased in bandaging. He looked like a half-wrapped mummy.

Castiel heaved a sigh and sat down next to the bed on a white plastic chair. Without hesitation, he reached a hand out and delicately grabbed a hold of Dean's, gently rubbing his fingers over the bruised and rough knuckles. Blood was present under Dean's fingertips. It looked as though he had smashed his finger. It was covered in a clear bandage, probably just to keep air out and to keep the medicine in. Castiel could see the swelling. For a moment, he just stared at his boyfriend's hand and then he finally looked away and focused on Dean's face.

It was slack and pale just like Sam's. The contrasting color of the freckles just helped to magnify the pallor of his skin.

"I wish this didn't happen," Castiel sighed. He knew it wouldn't change anything, but he felt like saying it all the same. He just wanted to talk to Dean, to somehow reassure himself that everything was okay. "I love you, you big idiot. Why do you keep checking yourself into hospitals? I thought you said the food sucks." He smiled somewhat bitterly to himself and sighed yet again.

The room smelled sterile and like medicine. It made Castiel remember the liquid medicines his parents used to make him choke down when he was sick as a kid, before he'd started taking medicine in pill form. He wrinkled his nose in contempt, remembering a particularly horrid yellow liquid that had made him want to throw up just thinking about it when he'd been younger.

"You look like shit," Castiel felt like telling Dean. He could almost hear Dean's stubborn protest in his head, and it made him want to smile, and so he did. Faintly, but he smiled nevertheless. "Sam's fine. So is your precious car. And your father. So just worry about getting better yourself, okay? We're all here for you." He didn't know what to say, but he didn't want to stop talking. It was easier to convince himself everything was going to be okay if he just kept talking to Dean.

Dean didn't respond in the slightest. Castiel didn't expect him to. The doctor's had said they were keeping him sedated for the time being. He was unconscious. He probably wouldn't be waking any time soon.

But Castiel desperately wanted him to wake up. The two had a lot to talk about. And he wanted to see Dean's eyes again, to know he wasn't lying when he said he was 'fine'. Was that so much to ask? Why did this kind of stuff have to keep happening? It wasn't fair! Not to anyone. Especially not to Dean, or Sam. Or John.

None of this was fair.

At all.

"I hope you wake up soon. I could really go for hearing your voice right about now."

Maybe that sounded cheesy. He could almost hear Dean complaining about chick-flick moments.

The thought almost made him grin. Almost.

"Wake up soon, man. It's too quiet otherwise."

Everything had been going so fine…and then this had happened. Hadn't they all been through enough?

_Why, God?_ Castiel thought. _Why does this stuff keep happening?_

He didn't understand. He didn't know what to do.

He just felt helpless all around.

Sighing, he scrubbed a hand across his face. He tightened his grip on Dean's hand, wanting to feel it clutch back, but nothing happened. He didn't really expect anything to, but he'd been hoping something would. He'd been hoping that Dean would respond in some way, but he really was unconscious.

Castiel wondered if Dean could even hear him.

He used his other hand and lightly touched the tips of his fingers to the bandaging around Dean's head. Then he combed those fingers gently through the dark blonde hair. "Wake up soon," he said again. "I'm tired of you making me worry about you. If you want to be in a hospital so much, become a doctor or something."

He shook his head and sighed yet again. He seemed to be doing a lot of that, he noticed, but he honestly didn't know what to do. He felt so helpless, so useless…

What could he do to help Dean? Or Sam?

"Everything will be okay," he said aloud.

He wasn't sure if he was saying that to himself or to Dean.

Maybe a little of both.

* * *

Heh hope it sounds okay! Sorry not much happens, lol. Thanks for reading and please review!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	17. Chapter 17

Sorry it's been so long XD Almost a month, gasp!

Reasons/excuses:  
*I have been sick and I STILL have my stupid cough three weeks after the fact...  
*Been working on original stories such as Tasteful, Never the Same, and The Real Bloodsuckers  
*My birthday came XD I am 18 now, yay. Though it would have been better if Papaw were there :(  
*A stray cat showed up at my house, I now call her Amity and we are slowly integrating her into an inside cat without Dad knowing...  
*Laziness...  
*Government takes up half my stupid time 'cause it takes forever and is very repetitive. Ends the 23 though.  
*Writing camp! Yay! :D I love writing camp XD But it's over now :(  
*Several bad headaches in the month since I've last posted. Also neurologist visits and EEG tests and stuff. Fun, eh?

Anyway :D To try and make up for my delay, this chapter is a little longer and hopefully makes you smile. Um...I'm not sure how great it is, but pie is mentioned XD and smiting. And brotherliness at the beginning, maybe? Hmm. Anyway, I'm trying to get my edge back on this story after all that happened with the family and stuff, and thank you all SO VERY MUCH for your wonderful support! You guys are so completely awesome! I would name you all here but that would take up a whole chapter itself O.O That's how many of you wonderful people there are here. Anywho. I'm going to shut up now because I have a feeling I am ranting and boring you...

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Seventeen

Castiel never left Dean's bedside, except to occasionally check on Sam. According to John, Sam had woken briefly, taken a few sips of water, and had then went back to sleep after learning Dean was okay. He had only been awake a few short minutes and so Castiel hadn't seen him awake. Only John had…or, rather, John had known he was awake, since he couldn't necessarily see. Dean, on the other hand, had yet to wake, but the doctors didn't seem too concerned about that yet. They kept assuring him that Dean would wake in his own time and that everything was fine. The prognosis was good. Dean and Sam would both be okay.

So why did Castiel feel so damn edgy? His skin felt itchy, like it didn't belong to him. He kept tapping his fingers against his knees as he sat like a couch potato in the plastic chair next to Dean's bed. Occasionally he ran his fingers along Dean's knuckles. Sometimes he squeezed his hand, wanting Dean to squeeze back and wake up, but that never happened. It was too soon to worry, though, according to the doctors. Dean would wake up soon. He would be okay.

It was hard to keep thinking that, though, when he kept allowing his gaze to wander back to the bandaging on his head. Castiel was reminded of before, when the truck had nearly run Dean down with Justin behind the wheel. That had been a scary time indeed, and he felt now much like he had back then - helpless to do anything and desperate for Dean to wake up.

Of course, it was worse now, almost. Because the two had only grown closer in the time since then, and while it had been hard then, it was much harder now, seeing Dean lay there, still and quiet, two things that were completely wrong for him.

There was a soft, faint knock at the door and Castiel moved his hand away, glancing toward the door to see his brother enter the room. He sighed as Jimmy came toward him and stood at his side.

"Mom's getting worried," his twin said softly. "We should probably go. Visiting hours will…end soon anyway."

"I can't leave," Castiel said before he could stop himself, but it was the truth. He couldn't just leave. He remembered Dean's shock that first time in the hospital, how he'd behaved so confused as to why Castiel was even there to see him. He had to stay, to let Dean know he was there and that he wasn't going anywhere. Why did this have to happen, and after they'd finally gotten back to normal? It wasn't fair. "I can't leave," he said again, his voice just a low breath of air this time as he swiveled his gaze back toward the motionless form in the bed.

Jimmy sighed heavily next to him. "I know you think you can't, Cassie, but we have to. Visiting hours will be over soon and we have to get home. You said you didn't want Mom to come up here, right? Well, she's worried and wants us to come home soon. I hate making her worry, especially with how Dad…" he trailed off and looked away. Castiel blinked and glanced at his twin because that was the first time he'd heard Jimmy mention their father since he'd packed his bags and left the house and hadn't returned.

Now, looking at his brother as though for the first time in a long time, Castiel could see the way Jimmy's eyes were open just a little too wide, were darting around just a little too fast. His brother was worried. Not just for Dean and Sam, but for their father and mother as well. Jimmy was also hurt. Castiel could see it, and now that he thought about it…that strange feeling that had been niggling at his chest the past few days, it wasn't his. It was Jimmy's pain. His twin brother's hurt at how their father had left.

Of the two of them, Jimmy had been closer to their father. Castiel had connected more with their mother as the more quiet and shy of the two of them, while Jimmy had been more…well, more. Jimmy and their father had bonded over cars, which was probably why Jimmy now had a car and Castiel didn't even though they were the same age. The fact that Jimmy was a few minutes older had nothing to do with it.

It was making sense, now. Jimmy had been staying away from the house lately. Castiel had thought Jimmy had just found new friends and hadn't wanted to spend time with his brother anymore. Why would he? He'd thought that Jimmy was just tired of being home all the time, when in reality, he just didn't like the thought of the fighting, of their father leaving. It had hurt him, and somehow, for this long, he had managed to hide it from Castiel.

Castiel felt like the worst brother in the world. He had no doubt in his mind that if it was Sam that had felt hurt, Dean wouldn't have missed something like this. Dean was the best brother out there, he was sure.

"Jimmy…" he murmured, sighing, not sure as to what to say. Words had never exactly been his forte, after all. "Look, Dad, he…he'll come back. He…"

Except, he wasn't sure. Their parents had fights before, sure, like all parents. They weren't perfect. No one was. They were human. They had their disagreements. Sometimes they slept in different rooms, one in the bedroom and one downstairs on the living room couch if the spats got out of hand and couldn't be resolved by bedtime. But this was by far the worst of them all. Never before had their father walked out on them. Castiel himself didn't know what to think about it. Maybe he was still in denial that it had happened. Half the time he was able to convince himself that Dad was just working. Sometimes his father went on business trips and was gone for a few days. Sometimes they went days without seeing each other, so that sort of made it easy, but now…

He swallowed and shook his head. Jimmy offered him a faint smile and shook his head, resting a hand lightly on his shoulder. "It's okay," he said very quietly. "I just…I didn't think he'd really leave, that's all. I thought he'd at least call to…see how we were doing, if anything. We're his kids. And Mom…"

Castiel nodded but decided to keep his mouth shut, mostly because he had no idea what to say, or how to make this situation better. It seemed as though everything was going wrong at once and he didn't know how to fix it, or even if he could. What could he do? Nothing. It was out of his control.

"But…" Jimmy took in a deep breath and tightened his grip on Castiel's shoulder reassuringly. "Everything will…it'll be okay. Dean will be okay, Sam will be okay…Dad will be okay. Mom will be okay. We'll all be fine, in the end. Right?"

Castiel nodded. "Right." Because he had to believe that as well, even if his brother was only trying to make him feel better. He willed Jimmy's words to be true.

* * *

Castiel returned to the hospital the next day, early in the morning, as soon as visiting hours started at nine. He had Jimmy drive him there but his brother didn't stay, thankfully. He thought Jimmy knew he wanted to be alone to check on the Winchesters. First he checked on Sam, who was sleeping soundly. He itched to go to Dean but he had been with Dean longer and he wanted to spend a little bit of time with Sam as well because he was worried about him too, so he sat down in the empty plastic chair and sighed. The sound echoed around the silent room, the sound only broken by the blips of the heart monitor and the sound of Sam's deep and even breaths. They sounded a lot better than yesterday.

Sam was getting better. That meant Dean probably was too, as the doctors had said, and they would both be okay. Castiel had to have faith, but that was hard when he was forced to watch two people he cared about lay motionless in hospital beds under white sheets in a room void of color.

He wondered when John would be arriving. Probably not until later, though. He had probably managed to convince the doctors and nurses to let him stay past visiting hours, demanding to stay with his sons, or so Castiel thought, and so he had probably left the hospital late.

Castiel really abhorred the hospital. The scent of it alone was enough to make him want to upchuck his food if he had eaten. He hadn't though, today. He had woken, showered simply because Jimmy had wrinkled his nose at him and declared that he needed to bathe or his stench would make Dean wish to remain unconscious, and then he'd been driven to the hospital where he now sat in Sam's hospital room. He wasn't hungry. He hadn't eaten last night either. Come to think of it, he hadn't eaten since Dean had fixed him food yesterday. Was it really only yesterday? God but time flew. So much had happened in so short a time…

He swallowed thickly and tried to keep himself calm. His stomach was churning at the moment, thinking of all that could happen in a mere moment, of what all could go wrong…

_Stop that,_ his mind snapped at him, sounding surprisingly like Dean's voice.

_I'm trying,_ he said back stubbornly.

He wished the Winchesters would wake up soon. He wasn't sure how much more of this he could take. Only a day and already he felt like this, his nerves on edge, his stomach knot of dread and fear, of worry and anxious hurt.

Like magic, Sam's fingers twitched on the bed. Castiel only noticed because his gaze was downcast and thus he'd caught the bare movement. He stared for a moment, unsure as to what he'd seen. Maybe his mind was playing tricks on him. Could a day of worry cause someone to have hallucinations? He would have to look this up sometime in the future, he decided. If the Winchesters were going to make this hospital thing something regular, he would definitely need the knowledge.

But then the movement came again, and Sam released a small groan as he tossed his head to the side. Castiel watched, transfixed, as the dark hazel eyes fluttered open and stared vaguely at the ceiling for a moment before rolling his way.

"…Cas?" Sam squeaked after a moment, his voice rough with misuse. Castiel instantly grabbed the cup of water on the bedside rolling table and moved to hand it to him, where he then proceeded to gently - very gently - move a hand around to Sam's back and help him sit up enough to drink the refreshing liquid. Sam swallowed a few sips and then Castiel took the drink away, releasing him and allowing him to lay back down. "Thanks."

Castiel nodded. "How do you feel?" he asked, frowning in concern.

Sam seemed to think about it for a moment, flexing his fingers. "Numb," he decided finally. "Tired." He blinked sluggishly. "Hospital?"

"Yeah," Castiel said.

"What happened?"

"A, um…" Castiel wasn't sure how much to tell Sam. Sam knew about what John had told Castiel, right? Sure he did. "A fire."

"A fire?" Sam looked confused for a moment before his eyes suddenly flew open wide and he scrambled to sit up. Instantly Castiel pressed a hand against his chest to stop him and press him back down before he hurt himself. "Dean! Is he okay?"

"He, uh…" What could he say to that? "They said he should be okay, yes." He would use the doctor's words.

"Should be?" Sam echoed. "What's wrong?"

"A few burns and scrapes, mostly, like you. He hit his head but they say he should wake up soon. They had to sedate him."

"Sedate him?" Sam asked and Castiel could practically feel his panic upping a few notches.

"He had a minor skull fracture," Castiel said, deciding he needed to just come out and say it before Sam took it the wrong way and thought he was hiding something much worse. Sam's eyes widened again and he started struggling. Castiel tried to keep him down as best as he could without hurting him or touching his bandaged shoulder. "Sam!" he hissed angrily. "Stay still! Let me finish!"

Sam finally assented and glared at him. "Tell me," he snapped.

"They got the swelling down and he's fine," Castiel said quickly even though he himself wasn't entirely sure of his own words - the doctor had assured him Dean would be okay, but he wouldn't believe it until Dean was awake and he could see it with his own eyes. "They sedated him for precaution while they fixed him up, that's all. He should wake sometime today. Okay?"

"What else?" Sam huffed, clearly unhappy.

Castiel released his hold on Sam, hoping the younger brother was done with trying to climb out of bed and out of the room. "He fractured his right ankle. He needs to stay off of it for a few weeks."

Sam nodded. "I'll make him. Is…is that all?" he asked somewhat timidly.

Castiel nodded. "Other than a few cuts and burns like you, yes, that's all. Now, as for yourself…you got a third-degree burn to your left shoulder and smaller burns around your torso," he said, practically quoting the doctor. "Also cuts and stuff. You're both going to be okay."

Sam nodded, seemingly satisfied, at least on that matter. "Can I see Dean?"

Castiel blinked. "I don't think they want you out of bed. In fact, I'm pretty sure of it. Besides, your eyes are going crazy on me. You're tired."

Sam scoffed. "You've been…hanging out with…Dean too much," he said through a yawn.

Castiel smiled at the sleepy Sam. "I'll take that as a compliment," he declared.

"Take it…however you want."

"Go to sleep. Your dad will be here soon - and no, before you ask, he wasn't in the fire. He's fine."

Sam nodded sluggishly, his eyes already drifting shut. "But I'm not…tired."

Castiel rolled his eyes. "You give Dean this much trouble?"

"All the…time. 's my job."

"Yeah, well…go to sleep."

Sam didn't say anything else on the matter as his breaths evened out as he drifted into a peaceful slumber.

Castiel chuckled quietly to himself. He hadn't realized how much he'd needed that little bit of normalcy, that little chuckle and slight banter with the younger Winchester, until it'd happened. He felt as though he'd been renewed with hope, like there was a light at the end of the tunnel.

Maybe things would be okay after all.

The door to the room opened and he turned to glance toward it. A nurse was leading John into the room. Castiel stood so the nurse could lead John toward the nearest chair which was his. "Sam woke up," he declared.

"That's great," John said with relief. "He asleep again?" He sat heavily in the chair, nodding at the nurse in gratitude. The nurse smiled and left the room.

"Yeah."

"Dean woke up."

Castiel's eyes flew open wide at the news. "He wh-…he did?"

"Yeah. Snapped at me to check on Sammy for him. I swear, that kid doesn't know how _not _to be a big brother." John shook his head, smiling fondly. "I think he'd like to see you."

"I…y-yeah," Castiel said, nodding quickly as he moved toward the door. "I'll tell him Sam woke up." He exited the room and quickly moved through the halls, eager to see Dean.

It was kind of interesting when he thought about it, and yet totally like the Winchesters. They'd both woken up at the same time and demanded to know about each other. It was wonderful to know how much they cared.

A smile was widely taking over Castiel's face even before he got to Dean's door. But when he entered Dean's room, saw the way Dean's marvelous green eyes lit up when he saw him, and heard the elder brother's happy "Cas!", the smile damn near broke his face.

"Dean," Castiel breathed happily, unable to talk clearly because of the smile as he moved toward Dean's bed. Instantly he leaned down and pressed his lips to his boyfriend's, feeling the warm swell in his chest when Dean kissed back just as enthusiastically despite the fact that he had been unconscious the last time Castiel had seen him, so still and motionless in his bed and-

But who cared? He was awake now. He was awake and his eyes were shining with that warm, loving glow that was reserved for Castiel and Castiel alone. That hadn't been stolen away from him.

And if that didn't make him happy, he wasn't sure what did.

He threw his arms around Dean's neck, careful of the bandaging on Dean's head. Dean chuckled warmly into his neck. "Miss me?" he asked jokingly.

"Jerk!" Castiel said as he pulled back, still smiling. He was sure his face was going to freeze that way but he couldn't help it at the moment. He was just so happy both Dean and Sam were awake and okay after having worried so much…

"Bitch," Dean replied automatically, smirking faintly despite the somewhat tired look in his eyes.

"How do you feel?" Castiel asked, fighting the smile away. "Do you hurt anywhere? How's your head? Any memory loss? Headache? Blurred vision? How's your ankle?" He rapid-fired questions.

Dean blinked at him. "Whoa! Stop. Hold up. I?" He pointed at himself. "Am okay. First off, no, I don't hurt. Good drugs. Very numb. Floating on a cloud, all that jazz. My head? Is fine. They better not have shaved off my hair or I will smite them with pie. Yes, before you ask, it _can_ be done! I'm just that awesome." He flashed Castiel a smile. "Memory loss? Clearly I wouldn't know if I have forgotten anything because, you know, I've forgotten it. And…headache. Again, no pain. Numb. Vision. Hmm…well. Does two of you count? Because I think I kind of like that. That has potential. And my ankle? What the hell is wrong with my ankle? No one said anything about my ankle." He started to lift the white sheet to peer under it.

Castiel chuckled and stopped him. Dean's usual witty yet joking response left him feeling as though everything was finally going to be okay. Dean clearly felt well enough to joke around and mention pie. Before he could stop himself, he was sitting in the chair next to the bed and leaning forward again, connecting their lips like long-lost magnets that had finally found each other.

"I like your bedside manner," Dean chuckled against his mouth, the sound reverberating off his lips. Castiel almost rolled his eyes.

Almost.

Except he was a little busy kissing his boyfriend.

* * *

And there ya go :D My goal was to make people smile but, meh, whatever. My writing skills are rusty XD Too much TV! (Seriously, I have been watching it a lot lately even though I usually don't...but hey, it's summer, c'mon!) Thanks so much for reading, and as always I apologize for any mistakes you may find. All mine. Thanks again and please review!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	18. Chapter 18

Yay, chappie eighteen! Sorry for the delay O.o Like...what, 2 and a half weeks or so? Hmm. 3 weeks? Anyway. The reason/excuse behind my delay:

I AM SO LOOPY! XD It's...not fun at all. If any of you have gotten messages/reviews from me, then you know allllll about it. Cuppie especially (she forced me to take them and laughed at me when I got loopy...=-= glare!).

Why am I loopy? Wellllll...Remember I said I went to neurologist? XD Funny story. They gave me headache meds, right? Well they didn't work so they upped the...the...? How strong it was. There. And the side effect is that it makes me reallllllly sleepy XD So I sleep sooooooo much now and if I'm not sleeping I'm mega loopy and spacey O.o and I can't remember the last word I typed. So typing is kinda out of the question...so yeah XD But I'm kinda used to it now so I can kinda type when i'm loopy...ish...sorta...this chapter was typed when I'm loopy so we will see how well it's working out, yeah XD Lemme know! XD Poor Dean is sex-deprived hahahaha my loopiness apparently makes me want to see stuff like that O.O wow.

Anywho wow long note.

And thank you all so much for your wonderful and lovely reviews! I love them all and cherish them and read them over and over like some creepy person who should be locked up XD Thank you!

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Eighteen

School was unpleasant without Dean. Well, perhaps that wasn't the right word. It was mostly the same. People were still friendly to him - sometimes even more so, giving him sympathetic looks. He collected Dean's homework for him in the classes they shared, and the teachers always asked how Dean was doing and how his family was, and how Castiel himself was taking things and about his general well-being. He knew they meant well, but honestly, it was grating on his nerves. He wished they would stop, because it was hard to pretend everything was normal when they were behaving so strangely.

He had been back to school for four days now. Dean was to be released from the hospital today, and he was overly excited about that. Sam had been released two days ago, and according to John - who he saw on his daily visits to Dean at the hospital - the younger brother had been irritable in the safe house the police had gotten them in town.

Safe house. Castiel shuddered every time he thought about it. He tried not to think about it too much, or give it too much thought because, honestly, it hurt to think about. The police wanted to send Dean and his family away for their own safety, and after that fire, it was probably the best move. Even Castiel had to admit that. That didn't mean he liked it. In fact, he hated it. The thought of Dean leaving, the thought of not being able to see him every day…

Not being able to see him at school right now was torture enough as it was, and he was only in the hospital. Castiel visited him every day. He had also visited Sam when the younger brother was at the hospital as well but he had been released. Dean would be going to the safe house today as well and he would get to see both brothers together again. Dean would be happy about that. Sam had been told not to move too much simply because of his burns and whatnot. Since he was still in his early stages of healing, the doctors didn't want him leaving the safe house for a few days, and neither did John so he hadn't been able to visit Dean in the hospital. According to John, who Castiel had talked to in the hospital, the younger brother had been increasingly grumpy at the safe house.

Castiel didn't bother going to Drama Club without Dean. It just wasn't the same, and he simply wasn't in the mood for it. He still saw the majority of the people in it throughout the day in his classes and at lunch, though. Anna kept asking about Dean and Sam and had visited the hospital once with Hunter. Castiel had debated about telling her about the safe house and about Dean maybe having to leave - he wasn't sure if Dean wanted her to know, though, so he didn't tell her, in the end. He would wait and let Dean make that decision on his own.

Jimmy drove him to the hospital after school. He wanted to go with Dean to the safe house. John had already signed Dean out but Dean couldn't leave until the police officer arrived to take him to the safe house after the officer's shift ended. John wouldn't be here today, though, since he was home with Sam and his eyes were bothering him these past two days.

Castiel rode the elevator up to Dean's floor and quickly walked to Dean's room, smiling as he entered and saw Dean looking at him. Dean smiled back at him with that cheeky grin of his, the TV remote held in his hand. "Hey, Cas," he said in his usual greeting. " 'bout time you got here. I need my dose of Cas a day."

Castiel suppressed the urge to roll his eyes as he sat in the hard plastic chair next to Dean's bed. Dean was certainly looking better. He still had bandaging around his head, but it wasn't that thick bandaging anymore, only a thin line of it that was mostly hidden by his bangs. He wasn't as pale anymore, just the kind of pale someone was because they were inside for so long. The heart monitor beeped a steady rhythm.

"This place is so _boring_," Dean complained like he always did as soon as Castiel entered. "You should totally sneak in here at night and we can-"

"Dean," Castiel cut him with a quirked brow.

"What? Can you blame me? I'm touch deprived here, man! And…" Dean's eyes roamed over him eagerly. "C'mon, you can't just sit there looking all delicious and not let me even speak my mind. This is America, we have rights. Look at the first the first amendment, I can speak my mind!"

"You were actually paying attention in Government? I thought you slept first period."

"…Okay so I was semi-conscious. So what? I was having dreams of doing naughty things with the first amendment that included you." Dean wiggled his brows.

Castiel couldn't help but chuckle as he shook his head. "I don't think that's what the teacher had in mind when he was giving us those lectures, you know."

"Yeah, well, he should have thought about that when he was using those words. I have a right to think _anything_ and say _anything_…just, you know, not in school…or yell 'fire!' in a crowded building…oh, idea! What if I yell 'sex!' in a crowded building? What would happen then? No one said anything about that and I think that has some potential. We should collect more data on this, Cas."

"You have officially lost your mind."

"I think you're right. You wouldn't have found it, have you?"

"What are you feeding you?"

"I don't know, but it tastes awful. Please bring me cheeseburgers and pie like I've begged you - _begged_, Cas - several times!" Dean looked at him with shimmering green eyes and a pouting expression.

"They won't let me. Besides, you get out today anyway. What would be the point?"

"I love you, that's the point."

Castiel sighed heavily.

"When am I getting out, exactly?" Dean asked, leaning back into his pillows with a heavy sigh.

"I don't know," Castiel replied truthfully. "Sometime around four or five?"

"That could be an hour or two hours away…damn it! I want out of here. It's boring. My skin itches. I don't like these sheets. This room is too white. This bed sucks. The TV is too high on the wall. It's almost on the ceiling. I hate this remote. The food here tastes like shitty cardboard and I don't even know how I know what that tastes like. My ankle itches and they won't let me touch my own leg. It's _my_ leg for crying out loud. Sammy keeps calling my room. He's talking my ear off and he's not even here. Where's my cell phone? I'm bored, have I mentioned that? And you're laughing at me. Stop laughing. I hate hospitals." He crossed his arms across his chest petulantly.

Castiel snickered, unable to stop. "Well…you sure have a lot of problems, huh?"

"I'm troubled."

"I can see that."

"No you can't, you're looking at my ear. Stop looking at my ear!"

Castiel laughed and rolled his eyes, looking away from Dean's head. He'd only been looking at the side of Dean's head because Dean had been looking at the TV and he'd been looking at Dean. "Someone's hyper today."

"I'm not hyper, I'm bored. There's a difference. I want to leave."

"Soon."

Dean slid his gaze toward Castiel suddenly, smirking. "Well…I know of a way you could distract me."

"Dean. We're in a hospital."

"Point?"

"And you're hurt."

"I feel a lot better and it's mostly my ankle…which they won't let me touch."

"No."

"Cas."

"Dean."

Dean huffed out a breath. "You're so mean to me, sitting there all sexy like and just….gah."

"You'll thank me when you're better."

"Doubt it."

* * *

Dean was so thrilled when he finally got to get out of the hospital. The only bad thing was that he had to use a wheelchair - both because it was lousy hospital policy and because of his ankle, which he had to stay off of for at least two to three weeks. He had no doubt that Sammy would definitely make sure he did just that, and Cas too. Castiel pushed his wheelchair for him as the cop led the way out of the hospital. Once they made it down to the car, Cas helped him into the back of the vehicle where they sat next to each other while the police officer folded up the wheelchair and put it in the trunk of the car.

Then they were finally off, pulling away from the hospital. Dean watched it disappear in the background, a grimace on his face. He hated that place. If he never ended up in that place again it would be too soon. The food there was awful and he just hated it all around. He shuddered at the thought of those rooms, the whiteness of it all, the scent of medicine and everything…

He yawned as they drove. The safe house was just outside of town in a small house. Sammy had been talking nonstop about it. There were only two rooms so he would be sharing with his little brother. _Great_. Right? He sighed heavily and leaned his head on Castiel's shoulder. He normally wouldn't do such a thing but he was tired, still a little drowsy from his medicine, the last dose he'd gotten from the hospital, the painkillers for his head, the burns, and his ankle. John or someone was supposed to get his prescription filled later today. The cops were supposed to get drive John wherever he needed to go. Sammy said the Impala was at the safe house. That was good. Dean would need it when he was able to drive again.

He wondered, briefly, how this safe house thing was going to work. He also knew that Castiel knew what was going on now, about how they were probably going to have to leave to go into protective custody. Castiel hadn't said anything about it to him, but surely he knew. They were going to a safe house - of course he did. But he hadn't said anything. That worried Dean a little, but he didn't want to talk about it right now. Maybe later, when things settled down a little.

Yeah, later. Then he would talk about it.

"Sleepy?" Castiel murmured, startling him out of his light doze. He blinked his eyes open slightly and peered at his boyfriend.

Cas's blue eyes were peering down at him.

Dean nodded, burying his head into Cas's shoulder a bit more. "Mmm…." he said in response.

"We'll be there soon," Castiel said. "I'll wake you when we get there." An arm came around him to keep him from falling over as they turned around a corner.

Yeah…Dean had the best boyfriend ever. He got to use him as a warm pillow.

* * *

The safe house really was small. A board had been placed over the steps so Dean could roll up them on his wheelchair and onto the small porch. It was only one-story tall and not very wide at all. Dean frowned as the front door opened to reveal a happy Sammy who lunged toward him. Quick arms tried to strangle him as Dean brought his own arms up and wrapped them around his brother in return. "Shouldn't you be, you know, following doctor's orders and resting and not moving much?" he asked with a teasing tone of voice as the stopped hugging.

Sam rolled his eyes. "Like you ever listen to doctors," he scoffed.

"Well, I have a feeling you're gonna make me and Cas has already made a point of making me." He sent a narrowed look Cas's way and Castiel just nodded, unashamed. He sighed and looked back at Sam. "So you have to listen to doctor's orders too. Where's Dad?"

"In the kitchen," Sam replied, beginning to push Dean into the house, taking over Cas's job. The cop was still in the car, just sitting there. Okay, awkward. Dean shook his head and was wheeled into the house.

He felt like such an invalid. Good thing this was only temporary. As soon as the two mother hens were out of sight, this stupid chair was _gone_. Of that much he was sure. There was no way he was staying in this thing for longer than he was forced to do so.

The inside of the house was furnished with small furniture. At the rate Sam was growing he wouldn't fit on it much longer, Dean was sure. But it wasn't like they would be staying here too long. The thought nearly made him sigh, but he held it in as he was pushed through the living room and into the kitchen. Castiel was walking next to the wheelchair - and if he thought about the wheelchair one more time he was going to stab his eyes out - his hand just brushing against Dean's. Sam was damn near snickering. Dean felt like smacking his little brother. Ah, to hell with it. He reached back and thumped his brother on the side.

"Dean? Sam? That you guys?" John asked from where he sat at the small, wooden kitchen table that only sat four people. In front of him sat an ashtray. Dean stared at it. John wasn't much of a smoker. He only smoke in stressful situations. He had done it after Mary's death but had stopped months later. That he was doing it again now made a pit of dread form in Dean's stomach.

"Uh, yeah, it's us," Dean said after clearing his throat. He stared a moment longer at the ashtray. His whole life his father had never smoked. He'd heard stories of John smoking but he'd never seen it until Mary had died in that fire. Then John had smoked. It had been hard at first - with his eyes and everything - but he'd gotten around that and worked his lighter and cigarettes and everything. It was easy if one knew what they were doing apparently. Now that he was doing it again… "Cas is here too."

"How are you feeling, Dean?"

"I'm okay," Dean replied. There was no smoke in the air or cigarette in his father's hand at the moment but the ashtray was out sitting on the table all the same. He glanced at Castiel and then at Sam, but if Sam noticed the significance, he didn't show it. "Are you?" he shot back at his father, unable to stop himself.

"I am," John replied. "You and Sam will have your own rooms. I have decided to sleep on the couch. Sam, show your brother to his room, please."

Sam shrugged behind him and back-wheeled him out of the kitchen. Cas followed after them as they left the kitchen and moved back through the living room to go through a small hallway. In the hallway, Sammy opened one of the doors and pushed Dean inside. "This is your room," Sammy said. "It's…the bigger of the two." He sounded like it wasn't his choice to give Dean this room.

"You can have it if you want," Dean sighed.

Sam shrugged. "Nah, it's okay…I don't need it."

Dean shrugged and looked around the room. There were two window right next to each other in it. They were locate on the far wall. No curtains were in it as of yet. Only a twin-sized bed was in the room so if Cas stayed over it would be kind of hard for them to sleep together unless they smashed together…but come to think of it he kind of liked that idea. He smirked. There was no closet in the room, just a medium-sized dresser that stood next to the door.

"Is the room okay?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, it's okay," Dean replied, glancing at Castiel.

Castiel smiled at him.

Sam rolled his eyes. "Lovebirds," he scoffed before squinting his eyes at Cas. "Can I trust my brother with you?"

"I think so, yeah."

"Alright, good. Or do I need to give you another brother lecture?"

Cas smirked. "No, I don't think that's necessary."

Sammy nodded. "Good. I'm hungry." He left the two of them alone in the room, shutting the door behind them.

Castiel shook his head and moved to sit on Dean's new bed.

"God, I hate this chair," Dean commented as he shifted in the wheelchair, grimacing.

"It's only temporary," Castiel said. "You have crutches you can use as well."

"Gee, thanks. That's so reassuring. I look like a dork either way." He sighed heavily. "My ankle feels fine."

"That's because you have painkillers running through you."

"Yeah, well…" He had no comeback for that. "Can't I hop?"

"What are you, the Easter Bunny?"

"Everyone loves my candy."

Cas rolled his eyes. "You're full of it."

"I taste like apple juice, I can't help it."

He sighed. "Do you hear half the stuff you say?"

"Not really…I tune myself out." Dean smiled. Then he bit down on his lower lip and shifted his gaze away slowly. "I…you know…Cas…this safe house…"

"I know, Dean. You…protective custody…" Castiel's voice went low and quiet, a soft whisper that Dean could barely hear as he, too, averted his gaze, his fingers curling around the sheets of Dean's bed.

"I'm…I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I just…I didn't really know how, and…and I didn't want to worry if…we didn't have to leave," Dean tried to explain even though he was sure he sounded a lot like a moron, stammering his words, but he was so nervous.

"You should have told me," Cas said quietly. "I…would have listened. You should have told me, Dean. I thought…I thought we didn't keep secrets."

Ouch. That was an accusation if he'd ever heard one.

Dean turned his head away and swallowed thickly, bringing a hand up to scrub it across his face, feeling as though he'd just been slapped multiple times. "I'm sorry," he said pathetically. "I should have told you. I know I should have. I just…I didn't know what to say. And…I didn't wan to worry you if…if we didn't have to go. If nothing was wrong. I'm sorry."

Castiel took in a deep breath and released it slowly. For a moment nothing was spoken and Dean held his breath, waiting. Then finally, Cas did speak. "I guess I understand," he murmured. "But…you still should have told me, Dean. I would have wanted to know anyway, even if…even if it turned out that you didn't have to leave, you still should have told me. Okay?"

"Okay," Dean said back quickly.

"But…since you did it in my best interests, you're forgiven," Castiel said, a soft smile hidden in his voice.

Dean looked at him. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. On one condition."

"…What's that?"

"You tell me what I really did when I was drunk."

* * *

Yuh oh, walked right into that one, didn't ya, Dean? XD Well...there's my loopy chapter...what do ya think? Let me know, please, and review! Reviews are love :D

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	19. Chapter 19

Gasp, another chapter! Already! For me, it's in the same day because I haven't slept yet! XD Hahaha! Anywho O.o I'm not sure where the ending came from...but yeah, haha. Anywho. I'm loopy again...so...yeah. Sorry if it's bad? Or if there are mistakes? I have family coming tomorrow/today since it's like two thirty in the morning and so yeah...I wanted to go ahead and write it because I can't write when they are here. hehe. Um. Sorry if the whole parents fighting thing isn't realistic...I mean my parents fought when I was like eight and stuff but I didn't mind...because it just didn't really affect me because it just really got me more attention because...well it didn't affect me. I got to have more time with both of them, you know? So, sorry if it's not realistic. I don't have experience with it :( But I try! Anywho. I tried. Sorry if I failed with Jimmy. Sigh.

Anywho.

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Nineteen

"_You tell me what I really did when I was drunk."_

Castiel's words echoed around Dean's head like a thick haze, a buzzing in his ear like a bee that simply wouldn't leave him alone. Dean stared at the black-haired guy sitting on his bed, sure that it wasn't Cas, his Cas, because that was a matter that was in the past. Right? They had put it behind them. It was done, it was past. It took a moment for the word to form in his mouth, but it finally did. "What?" he uttered quietly, his gaze narrowed and locked on Cas, his heart stuttering in his chest as he struggling to think of what to do, his mind already reeling back to that night in the alley, when he'd watched Castiel kissing Aeron.

The anger and hurt he'd felt from then reared up within him and he struggled to press it back down because it hadn't been Cas's fault - he'd been drunk, as he kept telling himself. It had been Dean's fault for not going to pick him up like Castiel had wanted. Dean hadn't gone to get him out of the house, away from the fighting. It had been the fighting's fault. Not Cas's. Castiel had just been searching for an outlet, that was all. And Aeron had been there - and Dean hadn't, and-

"I just want to know," Castiel said, breaking Dean, thankfully, away from that horrible whirlwind of thoughts. Blue eyes locked onto Dean's and held his gaze, and just like that, the anger dissipated somehow like magic. Dean released a slow breath. "I…" Castiel released a slow breath and stood from the bed, moving toward Dean. He knelt in front of him so they were the same height and Dean once again hated the fact that he was in this stupid chair. "I think…I deserve to know. I may have been drunk but it was me. I did it. Whatever I did, it was wrong of me. I know it. I hurt you. It was wrong and I'm sorry and I think I deserve to know what I did."

Dean shifted nervously in his chair and winced when his movements made a twinge form in his ankle. Castiel frowned worriedly and lightly touched a hand to his leg. The heat of his hand calmed Dean and made him sigh heavily. "Cas…do we have to do this? Can't we just…I thought this was in the past? Can't we just forget about it?" He really didn't want to talk about this. It would only make things awkward and make Castiel feel bad, and Dean didn't want that happening. Castiel didn't deserve to feel bad.

"Dean…please. Tell me. You didn't tell me about the protective custody, right? Well. Now you have to tell me what I did."

Dean winced. "I…" Well. Cas had him there, he had to admit. He bit down on his lower lip. "Are…you sure, Cas? There's nothing else you want to know?"

"Tell me." Castiel narrowed his eyes in a hard look of determination. Dean knew that look well. Yes he did.

He sighed heavily and lowered his head in defeat, averting his gaze from Castiel's eyes. "Alright…fine," he huffed. "You win."

"Okay. Tell me, Dean. What did I do while I was drunk?"

"You…well, you wandered off and went down this dark alley, which, by the way, is totally girly and cliché."

"Noted. And? What else?"

"Aeron found you."

There was a brief pause and Castiel's grip on Dean's leg tightened. It was his good leg, though, so it didn't hurt or anything. It just felt sort of reassuring and calming, letting Dean know he was there. It felt nice. "Does…this have anything do with why you were asking if I liked Aeron?"

"Well…sorta. You…Well. When I found you, you…kissed Aeron."

"I…what?" Cas asked like he didn't understand.

"You kissed him."

"I…Dean, I'm so sorry," Castiel said guiltily, horrified as he pulled his hand away and released Dean's leg. "You know I don't like him, right? You do know that? I don't. It didn't mean anything, I swear. I was just drunk and…and…I didn't know what I was doing. I don't even remember it, and-"

"Calm down," Dean said quickly, looking at Castiel, who glanced at him with wide blue eyes full of guilt and hurt. "I don't blame you or anything, okay? I know you were drunk. You didn't know what you were doing…it's okay."

"But…Dean, I-"

"It's okay."

Cas bit down hard on his lower lip. "I'm so sorry."

"It's in the past, Cas."

"But how can you just forgive me like-"

"You were drunk."

"But-"

"What, do you want me to hate you or something?"

"No!"

"Then?" Dean asked.

Castiel swallowed and shook his head, confused. "I just…I'm sorry. I don't know what to say. I'm glad you told me but I…I'm sorry, Dean. It didn't mean anything. I don't like him, you know that, right?"

"Yeah." At least, he was pretty sure he did. It was definitely nice to hear Cas say it. "I know."

"I'm so sorry."

"Stop apologizing," Dean said with a scowl. "You were drunk, it was a while ago - let's put it behind us, okay?"

Castiel nodded slowly. "I love you."

"Love you too, Cassie. Even if you are a girl sometimes."

Castiel smiled and leaned forward a bit, smashing his lips to Dean's, and Dean happily responded, wrapping his arms around Castiel's neck, pulling him into his lap, causing Cas to give a somewhat startled yelp.

Well…okay, maybe there were _some_ good things about this stupid chair.

* * *

Castiel woke early the next morning - like around three in the morning - to the sound of glass breaking downstairs and the sound of raised voices. It had been a while since he'd heard that. He snapped awake and sat upright in bed. Soldier growled at the foot of his bed, lifting his bed from his balled, sleeping position, his ears, standing upright on his head. Castiel rubbed a hand along the top of his head as he walked past his bed and dog and out of his room. Jimmy met him in the hallway and together, the two of them went downstairs to see what the commotion was about.

Their father, Mark, was having a heated discussion with their mother, Bethany, in the living room. A glass vase had fallen to the ground and shattered from its position atop the TV stand. What the two were arguing about, neither of the twins were really sure, for their voices had lowered somewhat and they were mostly having wild hand gestures at each other now and making weird and angry faces. Castiel was pleased to see his father, he had to admit, and by the look on Jimmy's face as he darted quickly into the living room, he was happy to see him as well.

"Dad!" Jimmy exclaimed as he ran at his father gleefully. "You're back!"

Mark turned and smiled at the sight of his two sons as he threw his arms up and wrapped them around Jimmy tightly. "Jimbo!" he said happily. "Nice to see you!"

"Missed you," Jimmy said, which was an understatement.

Bethany sighed and combed her bangs back and away from her face as she turned away from the two of them, her eyes narrowed at the ground. Castiel moved toward his father. Mark opened his arms for him as well and soon it was a group hug for father and sons as he was enveloped in it as well.

"Missed you boys," Mark said.

"Are you coming back to stay?" Jimmy asked as the embrace was broken and they all pulled away.

"No, uh, not yet," Mark said while sending a look Bethany's way. Bethany sent him a nasty glare in return.

"Oh," Jimmy said, looking crestfallen. Castiel put a comforting hand on his brother's shoulder, knowing how disappointed his brother was feeling right now. He could see it in the dark look in his twin's eyes, in the expression on his face, in the way his shoulders were held, the way he was standing. Jimmy wanted his father to come home. Jimmy was closer to their father while Castiel was closer to their mother. He wanted Mark home. "When?"

"I don't know yet…but we'll, uh, figure it out soon," Mark said, avoiding the issue, Castiel noticed. He frowned at his father and then glanced at his mother. He knew that whatever the problem was between his parents, it was his father's fault. He'd gotten that much from the arguments he'd heard between the two of them.

He could guess what had happened.

His father had cheated on his mother and his mom had caught him. Mark had broken it off with whoever, but it had been too little too late and things had gotten out of control. They had sought counseling and hidden it from Castiel and Jimmy for years, really - Castiel was surprised they hadn't seen it sooner - but it had all come busting out when their job frustrations had gotten too much and then their arguments had turned to what had happened years ago. The past always seemed to come back to haunt them.

And that just made him think about this thing with Dean. What he'd done when he was drunk. Was it really in the past, or was it just there waiting to pounce, to bite him in the ass, as Dean would say? Was it really in the past, over and done with, or was it waiting to strike and hurt them both, tear them apart? He wasn't sure what he would do without Dean, didn't even want to think about it - _couldn't_ think about it.

He swallowed thickly and tightened his grip on his brother's shoulder - not for Jimmy's sake, but for his own.

"You should leave," Bethany said after a moment of silence had passed in the room among the family members. A tense silence, Castiel noticed - not a comfortable one. It seemed that things could go sour even between family members who loved each other.

"I…yeah," Mark mumbled before looking at both of his sons. Then he turned and took his leave without even once looking back.

"Dad-" Jimmy took a few steps after him but then stopped and stood there, staring at the door as it closed behind their father. His hands, held limp at his sides, clenched and un-clenched into fists.

"I'm so sorry, honey," Bethany said as she came up behind him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, pulling him against her.

"Why did you make him go?" Jimmy asked in a quiet whisper. "I wanted him to stay. Why did you make him leave?" His voice was growing louder with each word. "Why do you always make him go! You always push him away! I hate you!" Then he tore free of her hold and pushed past Castiel and ran upstairs, out of sight. His door slammed shut a moment later, leaving them in bitter silence.

Bethany's shoulders shook for a moment before she turned to Castiel, her eyes shining with tears. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

Castiel allowed himself to be pulled into a hug, but he didn't know what to say except, "I love you, Mom."

"I love you too, sweetie."

* * *

After that morning's events, Castiel desperately needed to see Dean and get some relief. However, he didn't feel right leaving his mom all alone in the house with the way Jimmy was behaving toward her. His twin had left around eight o'clock this morning as soon as he'd gotten up, had left without a word to either of them. Castiel hoped Dean would be able to somehow come over even with his ankle. So he called the safe house using the number he'd been giving the day before.

The phone rang several times and for a moment, he was sure no one was going to answer and he'd have to try again later. Then, finally, Sam answered.

"Hello?" Sam asked with that teen sort of politeness - or, as Dean described it, the kind was polite but only just, the kind that just seemed to be tolerating the caller even though they didn't even know who it was yet.

"Hey," Castiel said, "it's me."

"Hey," Sam said cheerfully in a change of voice. "I'll get Dean, hang on."

A moment later, Dean's voice said, "Hey, Cas."

"Hey," Castiel said warmly, surprised at how much more calm he felt now that he was talking to Dean despite this morning's events. "How are you?"

"Pretty good," Dean replied. "You? You don't sound so good. Did something happen?"

It was sometimes a little creepy how well Dean knew him. "Well…sort of," he admitted.

"What? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. It's just…Dad came back this morning."

"Cas, that's great!"

"…He left again," Castiel told him.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Dean said sympathetically. "How's Jimmy taking it?"

"Not well," Castiel said with a heavy sigh. "He snapped at Mom and now he's not talking to us."

"I'm sorry," Dean said.

"Yeah…is there any way you can come over here? I want to…be with you for a while but I can't leave Mom after this morning and how Jimmy's acting. I mean, I don't want to, anyway, but I guess I can…"

"Well…I guess I could ask," Dean said. "I can be very convincing when I want to be. Plus I have my pills so I don't see why I can't."

"Alright - cool."

"But…you'll, uh…have to help me up your stupid steps into your house if I can, dude."

"Oh. I didn't think about that. Yeah, okay, if you can," Castiel said.

"Okay, hold on - lemme ask." There was the sound of the phone being put down, probably on a table. Castiel waited patiently, biting down on his lower lip, silently hoping that Dean would be able to come because he really didn't want to leave his Mom right now. Even if he was going to be in his room with Dean or in the living room with Dean or something, at least he would still be in the house with his Mom and she wouldn't be all alone. Presence of mind or something, right? A moment later, Dean returned to the phone. "Okay…Dad said I can but Sammy said no. So I can go but Sammy's going to be calling every half hour. Okay?"

"Alright," Castiel said with a chuckle. "Sounds good. Is the, um…"

"Yeah, the cop people are taking me over there. I'll be there in about twenty minutes. They'll honk."

"Okay. I'll be waiting."

"Alright - see you then."

"Alright - love you."

"You too, Cassie."

* * *

"Dean, would you like some pancakes?" Bethany asked, poking her head in from the kitchen. Dean and Castiel were sitting in the living room on the couch, watching TV. The glass from earlier that morning had been cleaned up. It had been gone by the time Castiel had gotten up this morning.

"Oh, God, yes. Cas, I think I'm in love with your mom," Dean said happily, smiling brightly.

Bethany chuckled and disappeared into the kitchen again. Castiel rolled his eyes. "You say that every time she cooks for you, man. It's lost all meaning."

"But I mean it every time so it should actually mean more."

"That makes no sense."

"It totally makes sense. It makes so much sense that I have cents."

"What?"

"I make so much sense that I have so much cents that I have made a change."

Castiel blinked at Dean. For someone who went around trying to make people think he was a moron, he really wasn't. He could really confuse people when he wanted to. And more in the 'twisting your words' kind of way, too. "Alright…has Sam been spiking your food again?"

"Dude. One time."

"Uh huh…"

"And it was revenge because I put Nair in his shampoo…"

Castiel snickered. "I think you deserved it, personally…At least he didn't mess with the Impala, right?"

"Hey, don't joke about that." Dean gave him a hard look. "He knows better than to mess with my baby."

Bethany poked her head back into the room. "Would you boys like some pie, too?"

Dean stared at her. "Marry me!"

"I'll take that as a yes," she said with a laugh and went back into the kitchen.

Castiel sighed and shook his head. "You're hopeless."

"Yeah but you love me anyway."

"I'm beginning to wonder."

"That's because I'm wonderful."

"Think you're hot stuff, huh?"

"I'm pretty sure of it, yeah."

"Ah."

"Ah? What are you, a dentist?"

Castiel could only shake his head and chuckle. At least Dean was in a good mood. He smiled and pulled his boyfriend close, sure that his mom was done asking questions for the time. He was pretty sure she knew, but…well…

When they got their apartment together, that was when he would officially tell his parents that he and Dean were together. Whether they knew already or not, that was when he would officially tell them.

Dean smirked and leaned into him. "Ah, my own pillow. Comfy la Cas. I could get used to this."

Castiel shook his head.

"Wonderful bedside manner there, Cassie," came an annoying familiar voice, and they both looked to Gabriel standing there, his arms crossed over his chest.

Dean and Castiel jumped apart just as Gabriel's mother stepped through the doorway carrying a suitcase.

"Thanks for leaving me with the luggage, Gabriel," she said with a heavy, tired sigh. Her hair, the same brown color as Gabriel's, was long and hung down over her shoulders in wavy trusses. Her icy blue eyes locked onto Castiel and Dean. "Oh, hello Castiel. Who is your friend?"

"This is Dean," Castiel said, standing up to greet his aunt. "Um…hey, Aunt Lacey. What…um…are you doing here?"

Aunt Lacey, Gabriel, Uncle William and Michael had just left not that long ago, so what were they doing back now?

"Your mother called me in tears about your father this morning…and I just had to come back. I caught the quickest flight I could," Lacey said tiredly, putting down her suitcase. "Gabriel came with me. He's ahead on his schoolwork anyway and his grades are up and he said he was worried about you and Jimmy, so I agreed that he could come. Michael is flying in later. William wanted to come for support but he got caught up in work so he can't make it."

"Oh," Castiel said, stumped. He hadn't even known his mom had made any calls or that she'd been upset enough to actually call in reinforcements. He shared a look with Dean.

Gabriel moved toward Dean and thumped him on the shoulder. "The hell happened to you?"

"Language," Lacey said, giving her son a look.

"Uh…long story," Dean said in reply to Gabriel's question.

"The food is d-" Bethany started to say as she emerged from the kitchen, but she stopped as she saw the rest of the people in the living room. Yes, Gabriel had indeed just barged into the house. "Oh, I didn't know you guys would be coming so soon!"

"Well, you sounded so upset on the phone that I wanted to come as soon as I could, and Gabriel wanted to come as well," Lacey said. "Michael will be flying in later. Will wanted to come but he got caught up in work."

"Oh. Thank you so much," Bethany said, and the two sisters hugged.

"No need to thank me," Lacey said. "How is Jimmy doing?"

"He won't talk to me," Bethany said, tears sparking in her eyes again.

Castiel looked away and felt Dean's hand lightly brush against his own. That did help calm him a little.

It was just all too much right now, really...

First all this stuff with the fighting in his family, then getting drunk, then Dean and the protective custody, now this?

He just wished all of these bad situations would go away.

* * *

Well, there's the chapter :D What did ya think? Sorry if there are mistakes...I'm still sorta loopy, haha and I'm tired...it's 2:30am sooo yeah haha. Bedtime XD Thanks so much for reading and please continue to review!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	20. Chapter 20

Sorry for the delay...even though it's only been, what...thirteen days? XD Even so, hehe. I tried to make this a longer chapter. 4,000 words, huzzah! :D Happy days! And it has humor. I'm in a good mood, soooo...no headache at the moment. I'm a tiny bit loopy, I will admit, so...XD I apologize for typos/mistakes in advance. Also, in this chapter, it mentions a game. If I messed up, I'm sorry :( Feel free to point out mistakes, I guess.

Oh, and if you haven't seen it on my profile, I don't think I'm going to be making any new Supernatural stories. I might make new Now 'verse stories (because they relate to this 'verse but that's something different and this is ongoing and a series). I will still finish series that I am writing (such as the Eyes 'verse and Dragon 'verse and Now 'verse and whatnot) but I don't think I'm going to be posting new stuff, like new, new stuff. I just...I haven't been watching the show or anything. I didn't even watch the second half of season six. It just...lost the edge for me? I dunno. But don't worry! It's happened before in season 5, in the middle of it. I stopped watching it but then got a craving again and started back up, so maybe it will happen again? But...yeah. Just letting you know. I will still take on challenges (to an extent if they're in my range of things I do) and stuff but...heh yeah.

Anyway O.o

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Twenty

"What are you wearing?" Dean asked over the phone with a smirk as he sat on his bed. Well, not his. His temporary bed, he supposed, but not really _his_ bed, because his bed had been destroyed in that fire. His _home_ had been destroyed in that fire, that…explosion.

Damn, but someone had tried to kill him, kill him and Sammy both. He bit down on his lower lip and tried to push the thoughts aside; they had no place in his mind because he was on the phone with Cas - _his_ Cas, his boyfriend, the black-haired, blue-eyed wonder he was in love with, and he couldn't be thinking about dark thoughts like attempted murder on his life when he was talking to him. That was just wrong. On so many levels.

"Really?" Cas intoned sarcastically. "This is the kind of conversation we're having now?"

Dean couldn't help but chuckle. Castiel always knew how to make him laugh. At least he was in a better mood now. When Cas's family had shown up at his house two days ago, there had been a somber feel at the Novak household as Bethany cried about Mark and Jimmy stomped around, clearly unhappy, but he did apologize for what he said. Clearly this was a hard time for him. He was close to his father and he was stuck in the middle of a family spat.

"Well, are you gonna tell me?" Dean asked, shoving those thoughts away as well and focusing on the person on the other line. "Or are you gonna leave me guessing? Because you know how creative my mind can be. Right now I'm picturing you in a leotard, getting ready for bed."

Castiel burst out with a tight laugh. "Dean, for the last time, I do not stretch and sleep with tight-fitting outfits."

"Aw, c'mon."

"I'm not a gymnast."

"Then gimme something to go on," Dean coaxed. "What are you wearing? Details! And don't skimp out on me, either. Every little nook and cranny."

Cas laughed again. It was a sweet sound in Dean's ear after the drama of these past few weeks. He smiled and lay down on his bed since he couldn't move much. Laying down was all he could do these days. It was annoying but, hey, who was he to complain that Sam was practically waiting on him hand and foot? Although he could do without the mother-hen-ing. That was sort of annoying.

"Dean, seriously."

"Seriously. C'mon, I haven't had my dose of Cas in two days! Two days, Cas, I'm dying over here!" He made coughing sounds as though to prove his point.

He could practically feel Castiel rolling his eyes.

"Don't roll those big blues at me."

"I wasn't - how'd you know?"

"Please. What don't I know about you?"

"Alright. What am I wearing?" Shit. Now he knew that bastard was smiling.

He glared at his ceiling. He'd practically walked into that one. Cas was getting sneaky. "Not leotards?" he guessed.

"Nope."

"Damn," he sighed sadly. "There goes that fantasy."

Cas chuckled. "Sorry to burst your bubble."

"It was popped ages ago. You can thank Hunter for metaphorically stabbing it."

"Doesn't he metaphorically stab everything you metaphorically create?"

"That's metaphorically besides the point," Dean said with a scowl. "And you're distracting me. Hmm. No underwear?" he asked hopefully.

"Dude. I don't go commando to bed. It's almost midnight."

Dean sighed. "Damn. Yet another fantasy ruined. A genie you ain't."

"Again, sorry." He didn't sound very sorry.

Dean smirked and shook his head. "Sweat pants, then. Gray. Socks. Probably a T-shirt that's a little big on you but comfy."

A brief pause. "That's…actually right." A bit of shock in his voice.

"Yes. I can read your mind. Bwahaha."

"Did you just…do an evil giggle?"

"Giggle? Did you just say an evil _giggle_?" Dean scoffed, sitting up with a small wince as his leg shifted. "I'm sorry, but 'Bwahaha' is _not_ a _giggle_. I have never once in my life heard anyone giggle like that."

"Dean."

"Seriously, can you picture it? Someone's just sitting in class minding their own business and all of a sudden they think of something funny. They start giggling and you hear this: BWAHAHAHA!" He did his version of evil, maniacal laughter. "Right in the middle of class when it's all quiet, but in _giggle_ form. That would freak me the _hell_ out. They should take out the evil laughter in movies and put that shit in it, I'd be the first to run out of the theater. Think about it, Cas. You're walking down the dark alley one night, minding your own business, checking your phone, and all of a sudden you hear this evil _giggle_ following you from the shadows…"

Castiel started laughing on the other end of the line and Dean smiled. _Success_. He liked making Cas laugh. He considered it a job well done when he was able to do so. Especially with all the drama and chaos that was going on at Cas's home lately. Making him laugh was a plus in Dean's book these days. "You're crazy," Cas told him with a sigh.

"That's what they tell me," Dean said back.

"Who's they?"

"I haven't figured that out yet. I'll let you know when I do."

"You do that."

"I will."

Castiel sighed on the other end of the line and Dean could picture him shaking his head in true Cas fashion.

"So what's up?" Dean asked slowly. "How's the, um…How's the family?"

"Pretty good," Castiel said surprisingly. "Jimmy calmed down. He's playing video games in his room with Gabriel right now. Michael's coming over soon."

"Michael…oh." Dean nodded. Michael was Gabriel's older brother, but he hadn't met him yet.

"Yeah, Gabriel's brother," Cas confirmed. "He wants to meet you."

"I, uh…um…okay…" he said slowly. Meeting Gabriel was one thing, but meeting Michael? He had barely heard two things about the guy - that his name was Michael and that he was Gabriel's brother. That was practically it.

"You don't have to," Cas said quickly, backtracking.

"It's fine," Dean assured him. "It's your family, Cas, it's fine. When?"

"I…When's good for you?" Castiel asked quietly.

Dean frowned to himself. "I dunno…tomorrow, maybe?"

"Alright…then tomorrow. Yeah. He can do tomorrow." He seemed to be talking to himself. Dean smiled slightly.

"Okay, Cas. If you're sure."

"Yeah…yeah, he can do tomorrow. That's good. Are you sure?"

"Yeah. It's fine."

"Okay. You don't have to."

"Cas."

"Dean."

Dean sighed. "Now you're just mocking me."

"I am not."

"You are."

"I am not!"

"No need to get defensive."

"I am not getting defensive!"

"Now you're shouting."

"I'm not - okay I am." There was a slight pause. "It's just…I'm not sure how well you two will like each other and I guess I'm kind of nervous. I mean…I…you don't have to do this, Dean."

"Calm down. It's fine. I said it was, didn't I? I said I'd meet him. Sheesh, Cas, it's not the end of the world, it's just your cousin. I met Gabe, right? He can't be worse than that hyperactive chocolate eater."

Cas chuckled somewhat. "Yeah…I guess you're right." There was a brief pause. Sure, it was midnight, but this was the only chance they'd been able to talk all day. Dean's pain pills made him sleepy and he'd slept most of the day and then had been hassled by Dad and Sam to eat and whatnot and this was the first time he'd been alone. He hadn't wanted to chance calling Cas, afraid he'd be asleep, but then Cas had surprised him by calling him before he'd gotten a chance to make up his mind. "So…tomorrow?" Castiel asked, dragging him back on topic.

Dean nodded even though he knew Castiel couldn't see him through the phone. "Yeah, sounds great. What time?"

"How about around three in the afternoon?"

"Awesome, I can sleep in."

"Yeah, same here." He could hear the smile in his boyfriend's voice.

It made him smile as well.

"Cool. Well, Cas…how about I let you go? That way I can get a head start on mother hen Sam tomorrow."

Cas chuckled. "Yeah, okay. I'll let you get some sleep, then. Love you, Dean."

"Love you too, Cassie. See you tomorrow."

"Yeah, you too."

The two of them hung up and Dean dropped the phone onto the bed beside him as he yawned, only realizing then how tired he actually was. He had been fighting sleep off and on for hours now, but it came and went.

He nuzzled his face into his pillow and dreamed of seeing Cas the next day.

* * *

Dean had mastered his crutches. Why didn't that surprise Castiel? He'd even managed to climb up the stairs with them on his own despite the fact that Castiel had told him to stay downstairs and not do anything too stressful. Did he listen? No, this was Dean they were talking about. When Castiel had gone to the bathroom, he'd disappeared from the living room. Castiel had returned to the room to find Dean gone and he'd then had to go _upstairs_ and had found his boyfriend sitting quite comfortably on his bed with Soldier sitting happily at his feet.

Dean had gotten up the stairs on his crutches. There was no stopping him now.

Castiel shook his head and sat next to Dean on the bed.

"I thought the doctor said no unnecessary movements?" he said, narrowing his eyes at the blonde.

"Oh, did he?" Dean asked innocently, scratching Soldier behind the ear as the dog leaned into his touch and happily wagged his tail as though he hadn't been touched in ages. That traitor. Castiel petted him every day and night.

"Did Jimmy help you up here? He knows better."

"No," Dean said, scowling. "I _can_ do things on my own, you know. I'm not an invalid. Getting up the stairs on crutches isn't all that hard."

"Dean…"

"It's fine."

"But - the doctors said-"

"They said a lot of things…but you have to just tune them out eventually or you'll go deaf listening to all their cryptic mumbo jumbo," Dean said with a small shrug as though it was common sense.

"Dean, they said those things for a reason. You have to listen to them," Castiel said worriedly. "How's your ankle? Are you feeling okay?"

He didn't look pale but that didn't mean anything. Of course he didn't look pale - anything better than the sheet pallor he'd been in the hospital was a dark tan.

Dean narrowed his eyes at him, a green glare fitted on him. "Cas, stop. I'm _fine_. And if you don't stop hovering I'm going to slap you. Do you understand me?"

"But-"

"No buts. Unless you want me to kick yours and show you just how _fine_ my ankle is."

Castiel took in a slow breath and released it quietly, nodding his head. "Alright…fine. But…tell if you start to feel bad, okay? You'll tell me?" He narrowed his eyes at Dean sternly.

Dean rolled his eyes in a quick swirl. "Duh, dude. No, I like being in agony too much. Of course I'll tell you." He sighed. "So, I take it Jimmy's hiding out in his room?"

Castiel sighed and nodded. "Yeah - with Gabriel."

"Playing video games?"

"Yeah."

"Ah."

"…We gonna join 'em? Michael's not due for another hour. I'm early."

Castiel frowned. "But I suck at video games."

"I can teach you, baby."

"Baby?" And he was going to ignore the way his heart skipped a beat whenever Dean decided to try new names for him. Yes, totally ignore it.

Dean smirked at him and stood from the bed with his crutches. Soldier jumped to stand next to him, a black, loveable lump of fur with blue eyes looking like it was just sticking out of his leg the way he was just sticking so close to him. Dean reached down and slid a hand across the top of the dog's furry head. "Let's play," he declared.

Castiel sighed. "Fine," he murmured, "but they're gonna eat us alive."

Dean's eyes flashed with good humor and mirth. "We'll see about that."

They exited his room and moved down the hallway toward Jimmy's room. Castiel knocked once before opening the door. Jimmy and Gabriel were both seated on Jimmy's bed with GameCube controllers in their hands. Jimmy put the game on pause before he turned his head and scowled at them.

"What?" he asked. "We're in the middle of a game."

"We're gonna join ya," Dean declared as he entered the room without waiting to be invited. He sat on the floor in front of the bed. "What are you play - oh, Super Smash Brothers Melee. I love this game!"

Gabriel laughed. "Why doesn't this surprise me?" He took a bite of chocolate which he had next to him on the bed - a large, king-sized Hershey bar. "You're in luck - there are two other controllers."

"But I…Do I have to play?" Castiel asked as he sat next to Dean, also on the floor. Soldier sat on Dean's other side, watching the paused screen in confusion, his pink, smooth tongue hanging out of his mouth.

Jimmy sighed. "Alright, fine…you two can join us. Cas, press the reset button while you're down there."

Castiel sighed. He guessed he was playing after all. He moved toward the black GameCube system and pressed the reset button before grabbing the two extra black controllers. He wasn't even sure how to _use_ these stupid controllers. Whatever happened to Nintendo? Why was that gone? It was so much easier. So simple. Now there were all these buttons…

"Choose your character," Jimmy said as a screen popped up with a bunch of characters on it. Castiel only recognized a few. He shrugged and picked Bowser - he recognized him. Bowser was tough. He used to be hard to be on the old Mario games.

Dean smirked and chose a character named Roy. Castiel had never heard of him. Jimmy chose Ganondorf. Castiel didn't know him either. Gabriel chose…Zelda? A woman? Castiel looked at his cousin oddly while Dean burst out laughing.

"Just don't ask," Jimmy groaned. "He keeps picking her. I think he secretly has a crush on her and wants to steal her from Link."

"It's the hair," Gabriel said with a smirk. "And that pointy chin. Pointy chins are my thing. They could take someone's eye out if you run away with them."

Dean laughed and shook his head. Jimmy put it on team mode, red against blue, and it was Castiel and Jimmy against Dean and Gabriel - Bowser and Ganondorf against Roy and Zelda.

Dean glared at Gabriel. "You better be good, woman."

"Fear not, hothead, this woman has intuition," Gabriel replied while eating more chocolate.

Dean sighed. "Well, at least this explains the choco cravings."

Jimmy picked a random location and the fight started.

Castiel had no idea what he was doing - he just started pushing buttons. The screen kept moving, growing larger and then smaller as the characters moved. He lost sight of his.

"Where am I?" he asked, looking around the screen.

"Dude, I just whacked you - you're on fire," Dean said, laughing. "Wait, nope, never mind. There you are - you're dead."

Castiel's health shattered and went back down to zero percent as his character reappeared. He sighed and jumped toward Dean's character of Roy, breathing his fire at him.

"Ack, what, no! I'm fire, you can't kill _me_ with fire!" Dean pressed buttons and had Roy jump away from him.

Zelda shouted something and was flung out of the screen where smoke shattered her figure. Her health shattered and she reappeared. Suddenly she transformed.

Castiel stared. "Did she just…turn into a dude?" he asked, gaping.

"Yes. Yes she did," Jimmy replied while kicking at Gabriel's character with his own. "His name is Sheik."

"Bloody transvestite," Dean murmured. "My team is an _it_."

"Hey, don't badmouth me," Gabriel said, "or I won't help you."

"You have to help me - or I won't help you."

"We could just leave them to argue," Jimmy said.

Castiel shrugged, still trying to figure out to work the con - he just jumped off the edge and died.

"Way to go, Cas, way to go," Dean laughed. "You're making my job of killing you very easy. One more life to go and you won't come back."

"Cas," Jimmy complained, "stop dying! Get behind me! You can't leave me alone against two people!"

"I told you I suck!" Castiel told him, because he had tried to warn them. But did anyone listen to him? No. No they didn't. "What are you doing?" He was watching Roy, Dean's character. He was currently just standing there with his blade raised. There was ringing sound…at least it sounded like it.

"I'm charging," Dean said.

And it was at that moment that Ganondorf happened to land in front of him. Roy released his pose and dropped his blade forward. A bout of fire hit Ganondorf at the same time as the blade sliced into him and he was sent flying out of frame, where he died. His health shattered and he reappeared a moment later.

"Damn it," Jimmy cursed.

"Heh, that's what you get for landing in front of me when I'm charging," Dean said as though he were king of all charging. "And that is why Roy is _awesome_."

Zelda - Sheik? - went all kung-fu on Bowser while Castiel was still trying to figure out the controller. He was knocked toward the edge but somehow managed to still hold on and climb back up. He pressed a button and suddenly reached out with a harsh punch and hit Zelda/Sheik hard, knocking them - it, her - out of frame and killer him.

"Finally," Jimmy sighed.

"Hey, I was trying," Castiel said. "I was just-"

Bowser walked off the edge and died. His final death of the game.

"Cas!" Jimmy growled. "Watch what you're doing!"

"Sorry!" he apologized. "I didn't know I was moving!"

Dean laughed. "It's okay, you'll learn with practice, you just have to play more often."

And with that, he swung his sword at Jimmy and hit him, killing his character for the final time.

And Dean's team, the blue team, won the game.

"New teams," Jimmy declared. "Dean, you take Cas."

Dean grinned. "When and how?" he asked, watching them.

Castiel's face flushed deep red. "Dean!" he hissed, swatting him hard in the arm, bringing his hands up to cover his face. Gabriel burst out laughing while Jimmy just shook his head.

"Ew, dude, no, TMI," Jimmy said after a moment.

"You might wanna change you're character, Cas," Dean said, grinning.

Castiel released a slow breath and took his hands away from his face. He grabbed his controller again and looked at the characters. He changed his character from Bowser to…Dr. Mario? Who was that and what did he do? Oh well, he was going to suck anyway.

"Dr. Mario, eh?" Dean asked, green eyes locked on him as a slow smile came across his face. "Dude, you better shoot some badass sleeping pills at these bitches or no milkshakes for you."

* * *

Michael Ramsey stood just about an inch or two shorter than Dean - well, regular Dean, not Dean on crutches. His hair was brown and cut short, almost like Dean's but not in the same spiky style that Castiel had come to know and love. Dean and Michael stood looking at each other for a moment as though sizing each other up and Castiel stood next to Dean worriedly, unsure as to how well this meeting was going to go but Michael had asked to meet him. Did Michael know they were together? He'd asked Gabriel not to tell him. He wasn't sure how Michael would take it.

He'd grown up with Michael and Gabriel but the two had always been different. While Gabriel had taken the news great and enthusiastically, Michael might now. What if he hated it? What if he was against it, against Dean?

Michael's blue-gray eyes were sharply focused on the person next to him. His cousin's eyes had always been like that, though, Castiel reflected. Sharp. Focused. Steady. Calm.

"This is Dean," Michael finally said.

It wasn't a question, but Castiel nodded all the same. Dean's green eyes narrowed at Michael.

"And you must be Michael," Dean said, his voice just as calm and sharp as Michael's as though he'd stolen it from him himself. "Gabriel's brother."

"Yes."

Castiel looked between the two of them. "So, uh…" he murmured, unsure as to what to say. He could feel a tension in the room and he wasn't sure why.

"What happened to you?" Michael asked, gesturing at the crutches.

"Oh, you know…accidents and all that." Dean shrugged. "I'm a bit clumsy."

"I see. And do you lie often?"

Dean's eyes narrowed into small slits. "I don't see how it's any of your business."

"So you do, then. Interesting." Michael nodded.

"Michael, you're being rude," Castiel said, glaring at his cousin angrily.

"And he's being a liar."

"I am not, you son of a-" Dean growled.

Castiel sent him a look, silencing him. The last thing they needed was to have someone get into a fight here.

"Michael…why don't you leave?" Castiel said, giving him a stern look that stated that he wasn't really asking, he was telling.

"Nah, Cas, it's okay," Dean said, smiling faintly at him. "I need to be going." He glared at Michael and then looked back at Castiel. "Have fun with your, ah…family."

"No, Dean…don't go," Castiel said, frowning at him. He didn't want him to go. He hadn't been there that long and he hadn't seen him in a few days. He looked at Michael, hoping he would get the message and go.

"Fine," Michael sighed. "I'll go." He shook his head like he couldn't believe Castiel really wanted him to leave, but it was true. Michael was being an ass. "See you later, Cassie." He turned and left the room. Footfalls echoed down the hall and down the stairs.

Castiel released a breath of relief and looked a Dean once he was sure Michael was gone.

"Dean…I am so sorry," he apologized regretfully. "I had no idea he would act like that. I didn't know he would…behave like that. I'm sorry."

Dean sighed. "I…It's okay, Cas."

He grabbed Dean's arm and pulled him back toward the bed from where Dean had been moving toward the door to leave. "Don't go."

"Cas…"

"Don't go. Please? He's gone. You can stay. Don't go."

He didn't want Dean to go. It had a been a few days since he'd last seen him and he hadn't been there very long anyway. Plus Michael had been an ass toward him already and he didn't want Dean leaving with that impression of Castiel's family. Also…he just…didn't want to be alone right now. Gabriel and Jimmy had gone out after their game - they'd gone to get something to eat and wouldn't be back until later, so he was alone in the house if Dean left. A part of him just really wanted Dean to stay.

Was that so wrong?

Dean sighed. "Alright…okay. I'll stay," he said, smiling faintly at him. "All you had to do was ask, Cas." He sat down on the bed and Castiel sat down next to him. "So…what do you wanna do now?"

"I don't know…but I'm really sorry for how Michael acted."

"It's fine. It's in the past."

"I know, but…but I'm sorry. I don't know why he was like that. He really shouldn't have been."

"Some people just are."

"I'm sorry."

Dean sighed with exasperation. "Don't make me shut you up."

Castiel frowned. "Dean, this is serious."

Dean shook his head. "No, this is silly. You're overreacting over nothing. Some people are just assholes sometimes, okay? It's fine. Honest, stop apologizing."

Castiel sighed heavily. "Sorry, I just…" He shook his head.

"It's fine," Dean assured him. His hand landed on his arm gently. "Honest. Just…how about I _not_ meet him again?"

Castiel nodded his head. Yeah. Yeah, he could do that. No problem. Dean and Michael not meeting up again sound okay. He could do that, make that happen. "Okay, yeah. Sounds good." He smiled at Dean. "I love you."

"You'd better," Dean said, grinning as he leaned forward and pressed his lips against Castiel's, the soft, hot and pliable surface feeling like a tender wonderland. "Because otherwise I'd feel pretty damn awkward when I said it back."

* * *

So :D Extra long chapter for now. Hope you like it! Thanks for reading and please review! :D

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	21. Chapter 21

Sorry this is so short! Haha compared to the chapters I've been writing, this one is shorter. But it had a good stopping point and I hadn't updated in a while, sooooo yeah, lol. Sorry for the wait! I just haven't been on FF very much lately due to the fact that I've been focusing on more of my original stories and their completion. But I'm back, at least for now XD lol. So I will try to get some things done :D Yays.

Thanks so much for all of your wonderful, lovely reviews! They are what inspired me to finally continue this story :D

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Twenty-One

Dean hated being practically bedridden. If he wasn't in his wheelchair or on his crutches, he was confined to his room by Warden Sammy. He wasn't amused in the slightest. His ankle felt a lot better now. It had been over a week since he'd been released from the hospital - why couldn't he just walk around on his own? His ankle and foot were in a small, immobile cast thingy anyway. Well, Dean couldn't call it a cast. It wasn't something someone could sign - otherwise he'd have made Sammy sign it and Cas as well. No, it was more like a little black harness thing that kept his ankle from moving the wrong way. It was very annoying but he was sure he could just walk around in it by now, and not worry about the wheelchair and crutches. He was fine.

As it was, though, he was sitting in his room in silence, staring up at the ceiling. They got TV reception here but the cops had only paid for basic channels - and more than half of them were either sports or news. Dean didn't mind sports, but he hated just watching them on TV. What was the point? Going to a football game at school was entirely different than watching one on TV. Playing in one was even better. One was more involved that way. So, no TV for him he'd decided for the most part.

He could read but it gave him a headache. Sam said it was probably a side effect from the skull fracture. That just made Dean sigh.

He could do some homework - Cas had been kind enough to get it for him, after all, he'd might as well do it - but really, he'd rather sit in silence than worry about math. Especially when he knew there was a cop car sitting outside for a _reason_, not just because the police felt like it. His family was being treated like this, being kept away from town in a safe house like this, for a reason. And as much as Dean tried to put it to the back of his mind, it kept pushing back to the front.

He was probably going to have to leave soon. Most likely, anyway. His home had been burned down and he and Sammy had been injured - of course there was a threat to them now. Whoever had killed Jimmy was seemingly after them as well, and Dean didn't know why but he knew it was dangerous. Sammy could have been seriously hurt in that fire - or worse. Hell, they both could have. And then where would that have left them?

It was getting risky, staying here. He knew this safe house was only temporary. He also knew the cops didn't like Castiel coming and going all the time, or Dean always going to his place, but damn it, Dean had a life too. He couldn't just put it on hold and twiddle his thumbs until the police decided what to do. That thought angered him slightly - what right did the police have to make that decision? To decide what was best for them given the circumstances?

The whole situation was touchy. John snapped at him and Sam more often these days. He was under a lot of pressure. Dean wanted to help him carry the burden, but truthfully, he just didn't want to know. He didn't want to know what the cops were thinking, what they were telling John, or how soon they might have to leave. He just wanted to enjoy the time he had at the moment, the time he could spend with Cas, and time he could be normal…

Because he was sure once they made his family leave, everything would change. And he just didn't know what to think about that. This was a situation he had never planned for, had never thought would happen.

His thoughts were interrupted when the phone rang. He had left it in his room earlier after ordering a pizza for the family and having the cops go pick it up for them so no one else, not even the freaking pizza delivery guy, knew where they were. It was awkward.

Now Dean grabbed the phone and brought it to his ear. "Hello?" he sighed, still looking up at the ceiling.

"Hey, it's me," Cas said.

Dean smirked. Talking with Cas always brightened his otherwise boring and glum day. "You know, you don't have to keep saying 'it's me'. I know it's you. You're like, the only one who has this number. Plus, I know your voice, Cassie."

He could hear Castiel's huff over the phone. "Well sorry - I happen to believe in common courtesy."

"Courtesy is dead, haven't you heard?" Dean retorted.

"It's on life support - it's not dead yet."

"Touché," Dean said, grinning. "So what's up?"

"Not much," Cas replied. "Took Soldier for a walk. He barks at every squirrel, did you know that? And when he sees tall grass, he simply _must_ roll in it."

Dean chuckled. "Sounds like the dog I got you."

"Mm, yes. Other than that, Gabriel and Jimmy are playing video games yet again."

"Of course they are - that's how they rule the world," Dean said.

"I can't picture them ruling the world. My mind implodes if I try."

"Well, we can't have that, now can we? We'll simply have to rule the world first."

Castiel chuckled through the line and Dean smirked. "How are you?" Cas asked.

"I'm great," Dean replied. "We ordered pizza and had the cops go get it for us like the delivery boys they are at heart, and I've been staring at my ceiling for the past hour or so. Did you know if you stare hard enough, you begin to get X-ray vision? Cas! I must try this on you."

Castiel snorted. "You're being ridiculous," he commented fondly.

Dean grinned to himself. "But being ridiculous is fun. It's so…ridiculous. Even the spelling of it is ridiculous."

He could practically feel the way Cas was shaking his head. "How's your ankle?" he asked, changing the subject. What a good idea.

Dean shrugged to himself. "It's fine, though Warden Sammy won't let me walk. I've been confined to my bed for the most part. You should come over - be confined to my bed too. I could think of a few ideas."

"Dean," Castiel said, but there was clearly a smile in his voice.

"I'm going out of my mind with boredom, Cas."

"Read something."

"Tried that, gave me a headache."

"Homework?"

"It's like you're a mind reader. No - math is too boring. I can't do it when I'm bored, it will only make me _more_ bored, don't you see?"

Castiel sighed. "Why don't you play cards with Sam?"

"I don't have any cards…but I could see if those cops have any. They're like my own personal shoppers. I need something, they get it, STAT."

Cas chuckled faintly. "Ah." There was a pause. "Do they…Have they said if you're…leaving yet?" he asked timidly.

Dean sobered and bit down on his lower lip. "I…No, not yet," he replied quietly, sitting up in bed. "They haven't said anything."

"Oh."

"That I know of, anyway. Dad's been snappy, though, so…maybe they've said something to him? I really don't know, Cas. Like I said, I've been pretty much confined to my room, so…"

"Oh," Castiel murmured.

Dean chewed on his lower lip for a minute before he sighed. "But, hey, don't worry, okay? I'm sure everything will work out in the end."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I just…I am."

_Things have to work out, don't they?_ he thought to himself. Because he couldn't picture himself leaving Cas any more than he could picture the two of them breaking up. The thought of not being with Cas was…well, it wasn't meant to be, really. The thought didn't want to form in Dean's mind, at least not completely. He didn't want to think about it. Things had to work out.

Castiel released a slow breath. "Well…okay. Then I guess I can be sure too."

"That's the spirit," Dean said softly.

* * *

Castiel couldn't feel his legs. He was sitting on his bed with his back against the wall, his legs stretched out in front of him, down the length of his bed, and he couldn't feel them. He put his book down and glared at his dog. Soldier lifted his head from where he rested on Castiel's legs. "You're cutting off my circulation," he accused. Soldier just wagged his tail. He shook his head and slid his legs out from under the dog.

He put the book on his bedside table. He hadn't really been that into it anyway - he couldn't even remember what it was about, at least not the main plot. He could just vaguely remember the last page he'd read and the main character's name. His mind was elsewhere at the moment, and though he'd been trying to distract himself with reading, it hadn't exactly worked.

He wanted to believe things would be okay, that everything would work out in the end, but really, how could they when so much had happened already? Castiel didn't know what to do to fix the situation. He doubted he even could.

He sighed and stood from his bed. Soldier stood on his bed, wagging his tail happily as he nudged his face into Castiel's side. Castiel patted his head and left his room to go downstairs.

His mother was in the living room, watching TV. She glanced over at him when he entered the room. "Hey, honey," she said with a warm smile. It was just the two of them in the house, seeing as how Jimmy had stayed at a friend's place for the night. She patted the couch next to her. "Sit."

Castiel sat. "What are you watching?" he asked.

"Just flipping through channels," she said.

"Dean likes to do that," he said before he could stop himself. It was just a connection he made in his mind and it sort of slipped out. Bethany smiled at him and nodded, turning her attention back toward the TV.

For a long moment, they sat in silence. Bethany stayed on a channel for a bit and then flipped to a different one. There didn't really seem to be anything on.

Castiel chewed on his lower lip. He wanted to talk about it with someone, but he wasn't sure if he should tell his mom. He still didn't know if Dean wanted anyone to know. However, this was his family and Castiel felt like he should tell them anyway. He glanced at his mom. "Mom?"

She looked at him. "Yeah, sweetie?"

"I, uh…well…" He shifted somewhat in his seat. How was he supposed to say this, exactly? "You know how…Dean and Sam were in the hospital, right?"

"Yes," she replied, frowning at him somewhat.

"Well…you know how the police think it was arson?"

"Yes," she said again. "What's this about, Cassie?"

He took in a slow breath. "Well, uh…the um…the police think it's connected with…Dean's uncle's murder in jail." He'd told her about it - of course he had - before it had hit the papers. She had then promptly invited Dean over to make him some pie. Dean, of course, hadn't declined.

"Connected? Connected how?" she asked, her frown deepening.

He hesitated - should he tell her, or not? But then he took in a small breath and pushed himself forward. "The police think that…whoever killed…Justin is coming after them. So…they're in a safe house. And…and they might have to leave. To be put into protective custody," he said, almost stumbling over his words.

"Oh, that's awful!" Bethany said. "How horrible! Why would someone be after them, do you think?"

Considering the fact Castiel tried to _not_ think about it, he didn't really have an answer. "I don't know," he murmured. "I just…they're going to be leaving soon. I think. I mean…unless they catch the guy who did this or whatever, because they think…this guy's the one who set their house on fire, and…" He took in a slow breath. "It's a big mess."

"I can tell," Bethany said, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry, Cassie. I know Dean's your friend."

_More than a friend,_ he wanted to tell her, but he and Dean had never discussed when to really tell Castiel's parents and he'd said enough as it was for one night. So he just kept his mouth shut and nodded tightly.

"Hopefully they'll catch the guy and everything will work out," Bethany sighed.

"Yeah…hopefully," Castiel mumbled.

He could hope, but that didn't mean things were going to be okay. That didn't mean Dean would get to stay.

That didn't mean he might not have to soon say goodbye.

* * *

And there it is :D My short-ish chapter, lol. Sorry if there are mistakes, I stayed home from school today due to a nagging headache and decided to write it, soooo yeah. And I don't have a beta, so XD lol yeah. Anyway, thanks so much for reading and please continue to leave your wonderful reviews!

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


	22. Chapter 22

Ahh, chapter twenty-two. Hey guys! I know, I know, it's been ages! Like 9 months, to be exact, and I am so terribly sorry! Life has gotten in the way, I'm afraid. And freaking Writer's Block! GAH! But, as much as I'm sure you want to hear my awesome excuses, I am too tired to give them right now. I basically wrote this whole chapter in twenty minutes (yeah...all this time and I didn't have a single word written of the next chapter -_- I suck, I know) and during that time, my meds started kicking in, so now I'm feeling quite loopy and in a minute, none of what I'm writing will make any sense. So. Bear with me!

Sorry for the long delay! I will try to be wrapping this story up soonest ;) Haven't decided on happy or sad ending, or if there should be a third book or just another one-shot or something :/ But, you know, let me know, I guess! You guys demand and I listen ;) lol.

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Two

Drama Club just wasn't the same without Dean. Castiel didn't even want to go, but after missing the past few meetings, Dean had finally convinced him to return to the club and 'spread the word of his awesomeness', whatever _that_ meant. Castiel as sure it just meant Dean had a big head which was growing larger, but whatever.

Anna seemed genuinely happy to see him, a wide smile overtaking her face as her eyes gleamed brightly. "Cas!" she crowed as she lunged at him. Taken by surprise, Castiel stepped back but was still engulfed in a larger-than-life hug which squeezed the breath from his lungs.

"Erm…hi, Anna," he greeted calmly as she released him.

"About time you showed back up," she said, grinning. "How's Dean?"

"Dean is…fine." Well, it wasn't a lie, was it? Dean was fine, so to speak. His injuries were getting better every day and Dean had even told him Sam would let him _try_ and walk now, even if it was just from the couch to a chair or something like that. It was something at least - it was a start.

However, it wasn't _fine_ that Dean might still have to leave. Dean didn't bring it up much and only really talked about it when Castiel was the one who mentioned it. Castiel wasn't sure what that meant. Did Dean really not know, or was he avoiding the issue? Had the police told him of their fate yet?

Fate.

Castiel sighed and closed his eyes, wishing he could block out this whole thing, but everything thus far had actually _happened_ and he couldn't go back and erase it, no matter how much he wanted to.

"Fine, huh?" Anna asked, like she knew the truth, except Castiel was pretty sure she didn't. As far as he knew, he was the only one who knew of Dean's…predicament.

The predicament which meant he and Dean might soon have to say goodbye, and damn if that didn't strike at his heart in such a way it almost left him breathless.

"As can be expected," he amended, hoping she'd drop it.

She did, thankfully, with a little nod and a small smile. "Well, everyone's going to be thrilled to see you! C'mon!" She snagged his wrist and led him toward the stage.

Castiel had to smile, felt it force its way onto his face. Her enthusiasm was almost contagious.

Hunter appeared near the curtains on the stage, grinning down at them. "Cas!" he said as he beckoned them toward him. Anna and Castiel climbed the stage and moved toward the curtains. It was then Castiel noticed no one else was in sight.

"Where is everyone?" he asked.

Hunter shrugged. "Back here," he said, gesturing behind the curtain, in the little back area. "Not everyone's here, but we're basically just chillin'. Aeron even sprung for pizza!"

"It's here?" Anna asked.

Hunter nodded. "Yeah! C'mon - before they steal all the food!" He grabbed Anna's wrist and hauled his girlfriend backstage. After rolling his eyes, Castiel followed after the two of them.

He was greeted by familiar faces and was a little shocked to realize how much he'd actually missed all of them. They'd really become his friends…almost like a second family to him, and having deprived himself from them for so long…

Well, it was nice to be back, even if Dean wasn't here right now.

But thinking about Dean made him sigh. He really wished Dean would return soon - nothing was the same without him.

And he couldn't let himself believe things would turn out badly. He couldn't let himself even think about the possibility Dean might have to leave…that the two might have to part…be separated…

A chill inched up his spine but was thankfully fought off when someone dropped a plastic plate of pizza in his lap. He was currently sitting in a beat up wooden chair, pulled up from under the stage. Around him were similar, worn out chairs and everyone was sitting around, having a great time.

He wished Dean was here.

"Thanks," he said to Ruby, who had handed him the pizza. Ruby just shrugged and returned to her seat. Castiel didn't know her that well, but she seemed okay enough. Kind of loud at times, and the two had never really spoken, but she wasn't bad.

No one here was really _bad_, and for the first time, Castiel sat back and took a moment to truly _appreciate_ this.

Appreciate his life here.

Appreciate his new friends…family.

Appreciate the Drama Club.

And most of all, appreciate _Dean_.

Things could have turned out so differently, but he'd been beyond lucky that first day, literally running into Dean when he'd entered room 124 for the first time. He'd been lucky to have Dean take even the smallest bit of interest in him, to have class with him, to be welcomed with open arms…

It could have been different. He could have been the outsider looking in, like usual, like all the times before. Dean could have picked Jimmy over him.

But things had worked out, and though Castiel wasn't sure why Dean had picked him, he wasn't complaining.

Honestly, he wouldn't have it any other way.

He just hoped things would continue to _stay_ this way - that his good luck would hold out and he'd be able to keep Dean here with him.

But thinking about that gave him a headache.

So he took a bite of his pizza and looked around at his friends' faces.

"So, Cas, how have you been?" Hunter asked, chewing loudly on a slice of pizza topped with three different kinds of meat - pepperoni, sausage, and bacon - and some kind of fruit…probably pineapple.

"I've been okay," Castiel responded truthfully. "Yourself?"

Let no one doubt his manners.

Even if courtesy _was_ on life support.

"School's been slow," Hunter said with a shrug. "Lunch is…boring."

Castiel couldn't agree more. Though he saw Hunter at lunch, as well as some of the other members of the Drama Club, he hadn't been talking to them as much anymore. Not since Dean was basically hidden from everyone…except him.

He had to keep telling himself that.

He knew where Dean was.

And this wasn't permanent.

"Anna's made some new, short skits," Hunter said as he bit into his pizza again. Sauce curled around his lips. "If you're interested."

Castiel cocked his head to the side as he thought. He hadn't participated in any skits in a while, and definitely not without Dean. Of course, as Jimmy was fond of saying - these were his friends too, and he couldn't rely on Dean for everything. It might be nice to distract himself from those horrible thoughts of upcoming possible separation.

So he gave a slow nod. "I might."

Hunter lit up and smiled. "Great! Do you know when Dean's coming back? I've got a perfect skit for him!" He snickered to himself, and while normally Castiel would find it humorous - Hunter's little plots with Dean - now he just felt his small smile fade from his face.

"I don't know," he answered quietly. He didn't know when Dean was coming back…or even _if_.

_Stop that,_ his mind chided. _Why are you being so negative? Everything will be okay._

It _had_ to be okay. Right?

He and Dean had come a long way since their Junior year, when they met. Things couldn't just…end, could they?

"How's Dean doing?" Aeron asked, stomping on an empty box of pizza. He picked it up and folded it before stuffing it in an ever-growing garbage bag.

"He's, um…he's okay," Castiel said, because he wasn't sure what else to say…what else he _could_ say. Dean hadn't specifically come out and told him _not_ to tell anyone, but he hadn't told him he _could_, either.

No, it was best left for Dean to talk about it.

When he could.

"Are you coming to next week's meeting?" Anna asked hopefully, eying him.

Castiel paused and then gave a slow nod. "I suppose so," he replied, and she broke out in a wide grin.

* * *

Dean lay on his bed, staring up at the ceiling in complete and utter boredom. While he could walk - limp - around a little bit, Warden Sammy was still on vigilant duty and wouldn't let him go very far. And besides, what was the point of walking - limping - if one could only move around in a stupid little cabin? Or whatever this thing was.

There was nothing to do here.

Cas had been collecting his homework, and in his boredom, he'd completed most of it this past weekend, to his utter shock and amazement. Time flew when one was so bored they actually _wanted_ to do homework. Dean never thought he'd see that day come.

He checked the little flashing, digital clock on the small dresser near the bed. It was nearly eight, his usual check-in time, so to speak. He rolled over, grabbed the phone, and dialed in that very familiar number. It rang a few times before a welcome voice answered.

"Dean."

"Cas," Dean said with a smile, "I'm touched you know it's me."

"It's our usual time," Castiel said.

Dean smirked. Lately Dean had been calling Castiel around eight at night, every day, without fail. It was the only way they could talk, really. The police had been edgy the past few days, and had changed the number to this place so no one had it. Dean himself didn't even know the number, so he couldn't give it to Cas. When he called Cas, the number came up as 'blocked' so that didn't help any.

Honestly, it was causing Dean to worry a little. Of course, if things were bad - as in, _moving_ bad - the police would have said something by now, right? Surely he would have been told if-

No. He didn't want to think about this right now. Preferably not _ever_, but definitely not now.

"So, Cas," he breathed, "what's up?"

"Not much," Cas told him. "I went to Drama Club today."

"You did? Awesome! What have they been up to?" To Dean's knowledge, this was the first time Castiel had gone to Drama Club without him, since he'd gotten out of the hospital this past time.

"They had a party today."

Dean snorted. "What the hell for? Did someone finally get Hunter some damn sporks?"

Castiel hummed in amusement, causing Dean to smile. It wasn't a sound he heard often, but when he did, he cherished it. "I don't believe so. I didn't ask why they had pizza, but they did, and a lot of it."

"Did you indulge?"

"Of course."

"That's my Cas," Dean said fondly.

"They asked when you were coming back," Castiel said quietly, hesitantly, and Dean swallowed and closed his eyes for a moment.

"I, uh…don't know."

"I know. Have they…?"

"They haven't said anything to me, no," Dean told him, as he always did when Cas brought this stuff up. He wished he had a better answer to give, but it was all he had right now. "But…" He chewed on his lower lip. "I'm sure things will be fine, Cas."

"How do you know? It's been weeks, Dean," Cas said, and _damn it_, it hurt to hear the, well…the _hurt_ in Cas's voice.

"I…I know," Dean murmured, hanging his head. "I don't know, Cas. I don't know what you want me to say."

"I want you to say you're not leaving," Castiel said, but then went quiet like he hadn't actually meant to let those words slip. They hung in the air for a moment while Dean snapped his eyes shut, taking a few deep breaths before he managed to speak again.

"I want to be able to tell you that," he admitted quietly, because it was true. More than anything, he wanted to be able to tell Cas with absolute certainty that he wouldn't be leaving…that he'd stay here and they could get a crappy apartment and be _happy_, damn it. But…he just couldn't. Not yet. Not until he knew for sure.

"I know you do," Cas sighed, and the weariness hidden in the breath was enough to make Dean's chest ache.

Sometimes he wondered if he was doing Castiel more harm than good. It couldn't be good for Cas to worry like this, to…think about this so much. It was a real possibility that Dean would have to leave and the two would be split apart. Cas would have to get over it and move on, like Dean would…well, like Dean would want him to.

Chances were, if he had to leave, he probably wouldn't be coming back…at least not for a while. Until the killer was caught, but whoever that was…no one knew. So no one knew how long it would take to find them, and put them on trial, and lock them away…and then have Dean come back for Cas.

He couldn't expect Cas to wait for him, if he had to leave. He'd expect Cas to move on, be free from any and all ties.

It was what his mind said was logical even as his heart refuted the point with a stab of hurt which ate at him.

_Damn it._

"Dean?" Cas asked quietly. "You, uh…you still there?"

Dean swallowed and nodded even though he knew Castiel couldn't see him. "Yeah," he whispered, "I'm here."

_Just not sure for how much longer…_

"Do the police have any leads?" Cas asked somewhat hopefully.

Damn it. Dean didn't want to burst his bubble. He wanted to breathe _life_ into that bubble and watch it float away.

"I don't know," he murmured. "Like I said, they haven't…said anything to me. Maybe Dad, but…Cas, I don't know."

_I don't know anything. I'm sorry._

"Oh."

_Oh._

Silence.

Dean scrubbed a hand over his face. He couldn't do this right now, _damn it_.

"Look, Cas, I…I'm gonna go, let you…get some sleep and do your homework or whatever, okay?"

"But, Dean-"

"I, uh…I'll call you tomorrow, okay?" he offered.

"Dean, wait-"

"Bye, Cas."

Releasing a quiet sigh, Dean disconnected the call.

* * *

And there's the end of the chapter ;) I actually have 3 pages of the next chapter written, so rejoice! It will be upon us soon! Huzzah! :D This thing is totally unedited and I'm tired so Imma go to bed now, 'kay then. Night everyone! And thanks for reading and please review! Sorry again for the delay!

~Averick~


	23. Chapter 23

I know, I know! It's been FOREVER! Again! I'm sorry. Really, I am. I had 4 pages of this chapter done for a long time, just...it got away from me. I'm trying to wrap it up soon because I don't like leaving people hanging over and over, and I am still working on Reverberating Footsteps - it's just hard because this story, that story and all the others are gone now, because my chip decided to die on me (well...Dad killed it, but still, it died) and so I lost inspiration. I even declared I was no longer writing _anything_ except for 3 obligations I had on another site. I didn't post anything like that here, so you need not worry about it, especially not now that I am back on track. For the fourth time I am recreating everything from scratch.

there was a recent tragedy at home - my baby boy, Blaze, died suddenly on Friday, Feb. 22, 2013. We don't know why. he was fine. He was playing and everything, and I even gave him a bath that day. he liked baths. He went to lay on Mom and Dad's bed and then about a half hour later he started puking. He was okay, just...a lot of puke, and I was with him for a bit but then went to the bathroom. When I came back out he wasn't anywhere in site so I thought he went into my room or something and he hadn't. He'd gone behind Mom and Dad's bed and I heard him getting sick and stuff. He came out and walked into the kitchen and started choking or something. Couldn't breathe. White stuff from his mouth. Dad tried to help, but...well...yeah. And he LOOKED at me, with so much _trust_ in his eyes, asking me for help, and I couldn't help him. He was my baby and I'm supposed to comfort him, but I couldn't. Instead I hid in the bathroom like the coward I am, because I couldn't watch him die. I couldn't sit there and remember that as the last thing of him. I didn't want to remember him like that. So I left the room. Plugged my ears. It was all so damn surreal. I just kept thinking it was a dream or something - wasn't real, you know? But. Yeah. I just don't understand. _Why_.

he disappeared the day before Papaw died. Four months later I was like "Please, I just need something. I can't take anymore. I need _something_." And the next day Blaze showed up again. I thought it was a sign, you know, like the worst was over and everything would be okay. Like Blaze was my sign, because he was good and the rest was wrong, and I loved him. And while it didnt' help that Papaw died, it was a start, you know? Like the road to finally healing. Then God took him away ruthlessly without reason, and I don't understand why. What's that supposed to say about "everything being okay" now?

Anyway...I am just ready to fall this crap to end. I'm tired of losing everything I love, over and over. To make things worse, my roommate and I are fighting. Why? I don't know. She just decided she was pissed at me and I don't know why, because I have done nothing wrong. We were fine, she went out to hang with another friend, came back and won't talk to me. I asked what her problem was with me and she just said "me, you and the other roommate are having a talk Sunday" so whatever. Fuck you too. You don't get to call meetings - you technically don't even live there, and I let you move into MY room, in MY apartment, because YOU needed to, so you better show me some damn respect. I am so tired of this shit. I am tired of giving and giving and people only taking and taking and never returning the favor. fine. Be that way. When you need help again, don't come crying to me because I am _done_.

Achem. Anywho. That's part of my absence. The other is I'm in college now. How is it going? Hell if I know. I don't even care about it anymore. I really don't. I don't know what I want to do anyway, so it's like it's just a waste of money until I know, and I have no idea. Life sucks anymore. Just waiting for the next thing to go wrong. My family never gets breaks. I should have learned this by now, but...well...yeah.

Anyway, sorry for the long rant, but I really wanted to get that off my chest, and now I feel a little better, I guess. Plus it explains my absence and I am really sorry it's been so long, but...yeah. I will try to write more soon, but I make no promises. I still have a short story I have to write for my creative writing class - any ideas? I'm open to them, because I suck at beginnings.

Anywho...I'm done whining.

Onward!

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Three

Dean didn't call the next day.

The fact kept rolling through Castiel's mind two days after Dean's phone call. Dean called every day - usually at the same time - but last night…yesterday…there had been no call. Castiel had sat up and waited…and waited…and waited but the call never came and he had drifted into an uneasy sleep.

Dean didn't call.

Why didn't he call?

It was hard to focus at school. Luckily the week was winding down so the work load wasn't _huge_, but he wasn't able to focus much at all. He heard people talking - teachers giving lectures - and saw marks on the front board from the lesson, but nothing seemed to really make sense.

_Why didn't he call?_

It wouldn't leave him alone.

_Why didn't he call? He said he'd call. Why didn't he call?_

Had something happened? Had they finally told Dean something?

A horrible knot formed in Castiel's stomach as a sudden thought entered his mind.

_What if he left? What if he's gone?_

No. No.

He couldn't think like that. Dean would have told him if he was leaving, if he had to go after all. There would have been a phone call, a visit, _something_. There would have been something.

Not just a missed phone call.

He was probably overreacting. Maybe Dean had fallen asleep and hadn't been able to call.

It was nothing serious.

Right?

* * *

The phone rang around six that evening. Castiel quickly snatched it up and whispered, "Dean?"

"Hey, Cas," Dean replied easily, and the tension that had been consuming Castiel's body all day disappeared. Just like that.

Dean had that affect on him, could calm him almost instantly.

Only Dean, though.

"Dean," he breathed, "why didn't you call?"

"Last night?"

"Yes. Why didn't you call?"

"Oh, uh, we got some news and-"

"News?" Castiel cut in sharply, his mind spinning suddenly. News. What did that mean? What kind of news? Did it mean Dean got to stay? Or did he have to leave? "What kind of news?"

"Well, they have a lead on who might have killed Justin and might be, you know…gunning for us, so to speak," Dean told him.

Castiel paused, unwilling to get his hopes up. "So they have a lead…are they hunting him down?"

"As much as they can, yeah."

"So…if they catch him…"

"Then I'm not going anywhere for a very, _very_ long time," Dean confirmed with an obvious smile in his voice. The tone itself was contagious because Castiel immediately felt a wide smile overtake his face. His face muscles ached at the intensity of the smile.

"That's great!" he chirped before he could stop himself, but it just made Dean laugh.

"I know," Dean agreed. "So now we just need to sit back and wait."

"How long?" Castiel asked, eager for things to get back to normal…eager to be able to see Dean whenever he wanted and not just when Dean managed to talk those officers into allowing them to interact. It had been torture lately, unable to just _be_ with Dean, hang out, as much as he wanted. If he was lucky it was once a week.

This past week and a half, he hadn't been so lucky. He hadn't seen Dean in what felt like _forever_.

"I don't know," Dean sighed. "I just know they said they think they know who did it. Now it's just a matter of tracking them down and, you know, proving it was them. But at least it's a lead!"

Castiel nodded enthusiastically before he realized Dean couldn't see him. "Yeah, and hopefully it will be over soon."

"I told you things would work out, Cassie," Dean said warmly.

Too happy because of this news, Castiel didn't even bother to correct him this time.

* * *

Two days later found Dean making his way through the house/cabin, whatever it was, triumphantly. He could walk! Hallelujah! He snickered to himself and ambled into the kitchen to grab a drink. He'd missed walking, to be honest. He hadn't realized how much he adored having legs until he'd been practically bedridden for so long.

But that was what happened when one had a panicky little brother with that stupid kicked-puppy face. That look could have stopped even Hitler in his tracks!

Scowling to himself, Dean opened the refrigerator and peered in at the contents. Hmm. Not much of anything, really. Some orange juice, milk, and cheese. Not even ham - just cheese. They didn't even have bread, either. So he couldn't make himself a sandwich. For a safe house or whatever this place was, there certainly wasn't a lot of food or, well, _anything_. It was boring around here, with only a few books to read, no TV to watch, not even a computer to relax with. Not even music! Well, okay, that wasn't entirely true.

The cops had finally broken down and gotten him an old, beat up radio. Most of the stations he tried to tune into were just static, lots and lots of static, but a rare few worked. Most of those were radio talk shows, though, and not much music. Still, if one was bored enough…they'd try anything.

But that concept didn't apply to food, especially when there was a surprising lack of it. There was a bit of cereal left, but Dean wanted to save that for Sammy's breakfast tomorrow. The kid was in the middle of a giant growth-spurt - he needed all the nutrition he could get, even if it _did_ come from Lucky Charms.

Lucky Charms which, even if Dean wanted some, Sam wasn't willing to share, even with his own brother.

Teenagers.

He decided to drown his hunger with stale crackers, which he found pushed aside behind the paper plates in the cabinet over the sink. _This will have to do,_ he told himself as he stuck his hand inside and pulled out a small handful. His nose wrinkled because he knew what crackers were supposed to smell like - and this was certainly not it. Oh well - he was too hungry to care right now.

He stuffed them into his mouth and chewed until they didn't taste like cardboard anymore.

After a few handfuls, he shoved the box aside and hoped the nasty crackers wouldn't be his downfall. The last thing he needed right now was to get sick when things were finally looking up for once. The police had a lead and soon all this would be over, and he could move on with his life - with Cas. They could be together like they planned.

The thought made a wide smile cross his face. Just the two of them in an apartment, graduating, celebrating birthdays and anniversaries, and-

_Whoa - getting ahead of yourself, aren't you?_ his mind chided.

_Yeah, yeah, no backseat thinking, mind._

He trudged back to his room because this was already a long day and he didn't know when Sammy and Dad were going to be getting back. There was a police officer at the door, waiting patiently, forever vigilant, but otherwise Dean was alone, and Cas was probably still in school. Therefore he figured he would sleep away the rest of the day to pass the time.

It was better than eating old crackers.

_Anything_ was better than eating old crackers.

* * *

Dean woke later to gunshots. He jolted into a sitting position and then jumped to his feet, ignoring the momentary twinge from his healing injuries at the sudden movement. He edged toward the door and then slammed himself against the wall as it opened. Maybe if he was quiet, it-

A hand snagged his arm, latched onto his clothing and tugged, causing Dean to stagger forward. The officer watched him, lips pursed into a hard, thin white line.

"Go," the officer said, shoving him out the door. "Now. Quietly."

"What?"

Dean exited his room to find Sammy in the living room, a wild look in his large brown eyes. Those eyes latched onto Dean and in an instant, his kid brother was holding tight to his side, hair a mess, evidence of how he must have been sleeping as well. How long had he been out? Surely not long enough for this stuff to happen, right?

"What's going on?" Sam asked quietly, and the officer gave him a narrowed eyed look and put a finger to his lips.

"Shh. Follow me out the back - quickly, c'mon."

Dean wrapped an arm around his little brother's shoulders as the two of them edged out of the house after the cop. Dad was nowhere in sight and he tried to ignore the bloody shoeprints the officer left behind.

He also tried to ignore the way Sammy trembled in his hold.

* * *

He had to make this quick.

With a swallow, Dean stared down at the little cell phone in his hand. It looked innocent enough. It didn't look like something that would soon be the end of his everything. Too innocent. Deceiving, even. It looked so normal when everything was falling down around him, and he didn't know _why_.

Sammy was asleep in the other room, in some apartment just outside of town. Just a resting place, he was told. Too dangerous to stay. Bloody shoeprints. Gunshots.

He shut his eyes. Tried not to think about it. Collected his thoughts enough to get his fingers moving, punching in the familiar number he'd dialed so many times before, but now it was different. Each stab at the number left a little piece of his mind shattered, and it became harder to think.

By the time the phone rang and connected, he didn't know what to do.

"Dean?" came Cas's cheery voice. "How is everything?"

He licked his lips. Tried to say something. Failed.

"Dean?" Concern laced the word now, like Cas knew, on some level, what was wrong. The hesitance in his voice left Dean swallowing a lump which should not have been in his throat.

_Pretend it's okay. Nothing's wrong. It's okay._

"Hi," he said weakly, more a breathy sigh than anything.

"What's wrong?"

He closed his eyes. "Nothing. Nothing, Cas."

_Lie, lie, lie. It's okay. Everything's okay. Nothing's wrong._

"Dean, don't lie to me. What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I just…h-how have you been?"

"You know how I've been - how are you? Dean?"

He chewed on his bottom lip. Fingers tapped against a wall and he pried his eyes open to find the officer watching him. He nodded and turned away from him as the man left the room, but he wouldn't stay gone for long.

"Is everything okay?" Castiel asked, voice all concern and hesitation, like he knew but was afraid to ask just the same, and Dean didn't know what to do to make that tone go away. He didn't know how to make Cas smile when he himself couldn't find it in himself to do the same.

"It's…It's okay. Just…um…I can't talk to you for a while."

"What? Why not?" Confusion, thick in his voice.

"Ran into a, um…bit of trouble. That's all. A snag. That's all. It's okay, though. Just going to go silent for…for a few days. So just…wanted to let you know so you don't…worry."

_Real smooth, Dean._

_Shut up._

There was a long pause, and Dean inwardly begged Cas to say something, because his time was almost up and he needed to absorb as much as he could. Silence was not what he wanted.

"I don't understand," Cas said slowly, and Dean cursed him for getting ready to poke holes in his logic, "you said everything was okay. You said they had a lead!"

"I know I did," he said quickly, combing his fingers through his short hair. It was getting longer, though. Steadily. He could actually grab at the strands now. "And it's okay. They do have a lead."

This wasn't a lie. If anything, they had even _more_ of a lead.

"So what's wrong?"

"Nothing-"

"Say that again and so help me God, I will hurt you," Cas said, voice a little more solid and somewhat harsh, leaving Dean pausing.

"Okay. Okay, stuff's wrong, but…but not that wrong."

"Then how wrong? Dean?"

"I…"

"Just tell me the truth," Cas murmured, and there was so much sincerity, so much hope, in those few words that Dean closed his eyes again.

He knew Cas deserved the truth. Knew Castiel _wanted_ the truth.

_Just tell him. You don't want the last thing to be a lie._

He took in a slow breath. "Cas…I gotta…_we_ gotta…we gotta go."

* * *

I'm not sure where the end came from, really, but whatever, there it is. I will try to write more soon. You guys are awesome for all your previous reviews :) Thanks.

~Muffy the Dough Slayer~


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